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Friend rejected from Imamother



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RedRuby




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 06 2007, 10:00 pm
I have a dear friend who has a Reform background, and is looking for ways to incorporate more Judaism in her home.

She thought that by joining Imamother, she could learn more about Judaism from all sorts of Jewish women. She applied, answered honestly to the questionaire, saying that she does not keep Mikvah, is not Shomer Shabbos, etc. Yael politely told her to keep learning and then when she is fully committed, to come back and reapply.

My friend is not offended in the least. She totally understands that this forum is a place for Frum women (of all flavors).

She is adding in Mitzvos slowly, she has stopped eating milk and meat together, she lights Shabbat candles with her daughter every week, goes to Shul pretty often, and is generally always trying to add to her Judaism. But she wants to connect with other Jewish women.

Does anyone know of an online forum that might meet her needs?

Thanks.
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 06 2007, 10:07 pm
The hesitation I would have in recommending an online forum for that need is that she could run into lots of misinformation. Confused
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Lechatchila Ariber




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 06 2007, 10:10 pm
I agree with crayon.
she can get in touch with ask moses is she must ask question on the internet or she can browse around sites that aren't forums like chabad.org and others.

But her best bet would be to find a real life source to ask her questions and learn.

(Just in case there is any offence taken, imamother isn't a kiruv site, and its to her benefit that she doesn't join up here. She will end up getting very confused.)
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RedRuby




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 06 2007, 10:20 pm
Quote:
(Just in case there is any offence taken, Imamother isn't a kiruv site, and its to her benefit that she doesn't join up here. She will end up getting very confused.)


I know, Esti, I agree...

It's a wonderful support for me, but really would not be meeting any of her needs.
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catonmylap




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 06 2007, 11:28 pm
Tell her to join the Jewish Moms group on cafemom. The group has a "frum presense."
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Marion




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 1:54 am
You can pm me and I'll send you a link.
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willow




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 4:59 am
Why not refer her to Partners in Torah?
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shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 5:22 am
willow wrote:
Why not refer her to Partners in Torah?


That's a great idea, willow. If imamother will do her damage, the other forums will do even more damage (don't forget if they accept her, they accept other women at her level - and worse - and on a forum everyone's opinion is 'equal').
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hila




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 5:55 am
She can join a yahoo group called chozrim women.
They are really friendly and helpful.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ChozrimWomen/
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He*Sings*To*Me




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 6:08 am
Is your friend located near a Chabad? When I decided I wanted a more adherent way of life and observance, I sought out Chabad. It cradles and supports "beginners" like no other Jewish movement on the planet. It's the best thing I've ever done!
I'm not intentionally setting out to sound insensitive with what I am about to say, but she needs to separate herself from the Reform movement. I realize there may be other factors to consider, like her daughter's friendships and ties there, but if she chooses the path of frumkeit, it is better to make a clean break now, than have to deal with people's reactions later on when they begin avoiding her and her daughter for becoming "extremists", as I experienced firsthand in the conservative movement I broke from.
You are an amazing friend to approach this topic on here and to be as supportive as I suspect you are! She's fortunate to have YOU! Wink
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amother


 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 6:13 am
hila wrote:
She can join a yahoo group called chozrim women.
They are really friendly and helpful.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ChozrimWomen/


I second that!
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RedRuby




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 7:19 am
HeSingsToMe...you are so kind! Thank you!

She does not go to the Reform 'temple' for about 10 years. She grew up Really Reform (eating bacon and eggs before Sunday school) and now keeps milk and meat totally separate, looks for hechshers on food, says the proper Brochos before eating food, sends her daughter to Chabad Sunday school (with Kosher breakfasts beforehand!), and affiliates herself with Chabad, all the while knowing she has so much to learn.

She doesn't see herself becoming Orthodox (although her daughter seems well on her way...all of 8 years old!) but wants to increase her level of Judaism, and in that way she defines herself as "committed". As in, committed to growing, learning, adding Mitzvot.

I will send her the links that all of you have recommended. She is an inspiration to me, both as a person, and as a Jewish women.

Because aren't we all on our Jewish Journey?

Have a wonderful Shabbos and a Happy Chanukah to you and yours!
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Mommy3.5




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 7:53 am
A good forum for your friend would be the Jewish womens forum, www.jwnhome.com
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chocolate moose




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 07 2007, 10:18 am
Not evryone thinks so, Mommy3.5. That's what was politely meant above.
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Mommy3.5




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Dec 08 2007, 10:53 pm
Maybe its just you.
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He*Sings*To*Me




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 09 2007, 2:55 am
RedRuby, you haven't mentioned anything about your friend having a husband traveling along life's path alongside her...is it safe to assume she's either flying solo or married to a non-Jew?

Within the context of one of your earlier posts, you'd mentioned that she answered honestly about questions regarding mikvah, taharas hamishpacha, etc. I may be wrong---and someone PLEASE set me straight if I am wrong---but, in either of those two situations, I don't believe she would be obligated to know the answers.

I am just so hesitant to send her in another direction other than Chabad...there are so many "mixed messages" within Judaism. (Again, I am Mod-O, although I'm a wannabe Lubavitcher...haven't been able to make it to BT camp or school as of yet!)
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shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 09 2007, 3:01 am
Mommy3.5 wrote:
Maybe its just you.


No, I also think the same. I explained why above.
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He*Sings*To*Me




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 09 2007, 3:10 am
Ladies, this is the only site I am familiar with...it's 3:05 am and I'm on here b/c I cannot sleep...can you summarize the other website offerings, or should I just check them out for myself (I really don't want to have to sign up to them to find out.) I'm just curious... Question
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