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Forum -> Inquiries & Offers -> Israel related Inquiries & Aliyah Questions
Realistic for single mom to make aliyah?
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 10:56 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
Wait, OP, you are from SA? And you are saying that your country is an economically depressed country?


Absolutely!
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:00 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Absolutely!
OK, thats a very different south africa than the one I know (my husband is from there and the people we know are living very comfortably)

If you are south african, I personally know that rbs has many ex SAers and I also know someone who runs/ran something for single mothers. I can try to find out about it more if you want more information.
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:18 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
OK, thats a very different south africa than the one I know (my husband is from there and the people we know are living very comfortably)

If you are south african, I personally know that rbs has many ex SAers and I also know someone who runs/ran something for single mothers. I can try to find out about it more if you want more information.


There are a lot of very wealthy south Africans making aliyah but I am not one of them lol.

Thanks! I'll take any info I can get.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:21 am
Deffinitely doable in my opinion! Finding a 2 bedroom in RBS for around 3000 shouldn't be too difficult. (Theres a few wattsapp groups to find apartments without any agent fees, in case that becomes relevant at any point).

And if you are willing to live simply then a single salary of around 8000 could deffinitely work. Your daughter will be eligable for free gan plus tzaharon for a minimal fee (like 50nis a month). That gives you from 7.45am-3.45pm to work without paying for childcare.

Not sure what field you work in but keep in mind that there arent a ton of job options in RBS when it comes to the tech fields etc, most of those are in JLM or TLV, which is commutable but you wouldnt be able to work full time without getting extra childcare.

Much hatzlocha!!
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:24 am
amother [ Violet ] wrote:
Deffinitely doable in my opinion! Finding a 2 bedroom in RBS for around 3000 shouldn't be too difficult. (Theres a few wattsapp groups to find apartments without any agent fees, in case that becomes relevant at any point).

And if you are willing to live simply then a single salary of around 8000 could deffinitely work. Your daughter will be eligable for free gan plus tzaharon for a minimal fee (like 50nis a month). That gives you from 7.45am-3.45pm to work without paying for childcare.

Not sure what field you work in but keep in mind that there arent a ton of job options in RBS when it comes to the tech fields etc, most of those are in JLM or TLV, which is commutable but you wouldnt be able to work full time without getting extra childcare.

Much hatzlocha!!


Thank you so much for this. Very positive when I have only been hearing negative for awhile. Most people seem to think I'm crazy for considering doing it by myself.
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:24 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
OK, thats a very different south africa than the one I know (my husband is from there and the people we know are living very comfortably)

If you are south african, I personally know that rbs has many ex SAers and I also know someone who runs/ran something for single mothers. I can try to find out about it more if you want more information.


Sa is very economically depressed even if there are wealthy people there
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amother
Ivory


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:35 am
OP, I currently live in Modi'in. We currently have a huge population of South Africans, and are also known for the amount of single parents living here. Our misread haklita is fantastic. You would have a tremendous support system. But, is it feasible? That depends on your job, and what area you would live in. For comparison, I'm currently in a 4 room 100 square meter apartment, paying 5,000 shekel a month. It's less expensive than Yerushalayim or Tel Aviv, but it's more expensive than other places. And I'm not even living in an area with a lot of anglos or dati people.

It's a great city, I would recommend it for most people, but especially in your case, please consider a pilot trip and start networking for jobs.
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amother
Linen


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:47 am
I think it is feasible.
I also think it's a good idea to live near friends.
Did you receive permission from your child's father to move countries? Because that's usually a huge obstacle.
About the job - someone mentioned securing one before you move. Israelis don't work that way. You get hired when they see you.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:48 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you so much for this. Very positive when I have only been hearing negative for awhile. Most people seem to think I'm crazy for considering doing it by myself.



I guess it's all a matter of perspective!

Yes there are many Anglo families in RBS and all around Israel that live luxuriously and may say that 8000NIS monthly is not enough to survive. Especially if they consider a car, take out food etc a neccesity.

But then you also have tens of thousands of kollel families, or not kolel but still living off one salary, and with multiple kids, and they survive. No car, no restaurants, no luxuries, but when many of your neighbours live the same way it's not such a big deal. That's what I love about Israel. The standards are simply lower, in most places that is.

What I've found personally is that the more money we make, the more expenses we end up having. We started with the kolel lifestyle and I was earning around 8000, with 2 kids, and we lived simply but happily. Many of my friends were earning around the same. Then my husband started working and our salaries both went up, we bought a home, we got a car and all the extra money basically goes towards those expenses, so we don't actually live that much more luxuriously. Not saying I'm not greatful, but I do sometimes miss the 'less posessions, less worry' lifestyle.

I do find that as people live a more expensive lifestyle they assume you need to make more money to survive, but can forget that a simpler lifestyle has less expenses.

I am an optomist though so not everyone will see things this way. But if it feels right to you, and with the right attitude, determination, and flexibility I don't see why you cant make it work. You may have to sacrifice some things but if it means that much to you to make Aliyah, it will be worth it!
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amother
Pewter


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 11:59 am
I lived in Israel for almost 3 years as a single mom, way way back about 40 years ago. My parents were in the States and I had no family in Israel. I had 2 very good jobs (one was a day job and one was as a contractor in my spare time) and I probably could have made it work indefinitely in that way. But...I had no family and only a couple of friends where I lived, and there just wasn't enough of a support structure for me. I finally left.

So the main thing I want to emphasize to you is, be sure you have a good support structure that you can count on. If you are looking for shidduchim, be sure there is someone who will want to help you with that also.

B'hatzlacha!
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banana123




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 3:30 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thanks for this Forestgreen. I wasn't aware that absorption centers still existed. Can anyone confirm? Do they take single moms with kids?

Last time I heard, absorption centers have long wait lists and many/ most people are rejected for lack of space. But it's worth asking the Jewish Agency.

Regarding what someone said that Israelis hire when they see you - this is true, and a rule of thumb is that you shouldn't expect to find a job until you've been here at least six months (though I've met some exceptions). That said, as a single mother, you have no choice but to have an income, no matter how long it takes you to find a job. So you'll need to do a pilot trip and pray hard, and/ or make sure you have an online job that you can do from wherever. Keep in mind that a non-Israeli employer won't pay your BTL (not an issue for the first year you're here, unless they've changed something), or your pension (definitely an issue - you're legally required to have one). Also keep in mind that if you work for a non-Israeli employer you will be considered to own your own business from the perspective of Israel's tax authorities, so you'll need an accountant. BUT, on the flip side, you'll have an income - food to eat, a place to live.

We did not do this in RBS/ Modi'in but we definitely did live on 5.5K a month, with more than one kid. It's doable. I don't know we would've been able to do it there.

Other thing is, people are writing like childcare is so cheap. So on the one hand it is, on the other tzaharon does cost, but unless you're one of the lucky few you're not going to be able to do pickup at 3:45 without paying a babysitter. Also you need to factor in the fact that you'll have 12 vacation days (not including the 9 holidays - R"H, Y"K, 2 Sukkot, 2 Pesach, 1 Shavuot, Yom Ha'atzmaut, and 1 Purim) and your child will have lots more - you'll need either lots of supportive friends, family, or to pay babysitters/ kaytanot. (Parents need more vacation days. No question.) None of these options are cheap.

I'm also going to note here that over half of olim leave within the first 5 years after aliya.
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finallyamommy




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 4:27 pm
If you do come to RBS, please come to us for Shabbos! And see if Lemaan Achai can help, and also PM me if you want, I can help in a different way but I don't want to reveal my identity.
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amother
Tangerine


 

Post Mon, Dec 02 2019, 7:29 pm
Just a thought I have

Does your daughter has visitation with her father? How will the move effect their relationship?

Can the girls father mess up your plans for aliyah?
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amother
Sapphire


 

Post Tue, Dec 03 2019, 5:46 am
if you can earn 8000 shek a month and have one kid I think you'll be fine. I know a single mom with one kid living in the merkaz who is managing on 6000. she's living in a one bed though and paying 2500 shek in rent. I think RBS is the most manageable place simply because tzaharon is so cheap so you can work.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 03 2019, 9:50 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thanks for the replies.

Bumping because I would appreciate more input.

I have chosen either RBS or Modiin as I have some friends there and I feel I will need some sort of support structure. I dont have family in Israel.

Does anyone have a standard budget for 2 people living in the Mercaz?

Anyone in RBS A - please can you tell me if its possible to rent a 3 room apartment for 3000NIS?


Where were you when I needed a roommate? I would have been happy to share my 3 room with you. Now I'm moving to a 2 room because I can't afford the 3 room anymore.

The last month or so I've been doing a ton of apartment hunting. I can tell you that Aleph has gone WAY up in price. There is no way you are going to find anything around 3000, even if it's a tiny converted basement. A lot of the smaller, less expensive apartments are illegally built and not up to code, so be very careful. I looked at one that was build on top of the roof of an apartment building, it felt like the apartment would blow off in a strong wind.

I'm moving to Givat Sharet. It's a lovely neighborhood near Old Beit Shemesh. Tons of Anglos are moving there, because they can't afford to get a place in Aleph for the same amount of room. I've heard that the schools are very good there, too.

I found a fairly large apartment on the bottom floor of a house, that has it's own courtyard and garden area. It's only 2,850 and that includes property tax (arnona).

Sign up here for alerts when new apartments come on the market, and get out there to see them within 24 hours. https://www.komo.co.il/code/na.....um=40 If you can't read Hebrew yet, right click on Translate to English if you have Chrome. Learn to use Google Maps to help you get an idea of where things are, and have a friend help you figure out what neighborhoods are what.

Check this site daily, as well. https://www.yad2.co.il/realest.....nly=1

Apartment realtors usually won't work with anyone for less than 4,000 a month, so doing the legwork for rent-by-owner units is worth it. Besides, there won't be a listing fee.

As for jobs, a new Ikea is opening on the outskirts of town (YAY!) and they are already starting to take job applications for all positions, and they do training. I'm not sure the exact opening date, but you should look into it.

Let me know if I can be of more help.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 03 2019, 9:54 am
PS: I babysit, and I already pick up a 3yo from gan on Thursdays. I'd be happy to take on a couple more days of pick up and after care, and I'm often available late evenings if you want to go out and do something fun with friends.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 03 2019, 9:56 am
Join this FB group! https://www.facebook.com/group.....0365/
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2gether




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 28 2020, 3:48 am
8,000 is just just enough
But who is going to watch your daughter if you have long hours, send her off-pick her up, vacation days etc.

Also if you don't receive support from your ex, you are eligable for social benifits (bituach leumi), but only if you earn less than a certain amount (for sure less than 8). So sometimes its worth it to earn less
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Aylat




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 28 2020, 6:00 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
If she is not from one of the countries that NBN work with, then only the Jewish Agency will help and the sal klita, while it helps, will not be something that anyone can live off of.
What jumpstart package are you referring to?


We made aliya with 4 kids and lived off sal klita at first. We stayed in a (barely bigger than) studio apartment belonging to family and didn't pay rent for 5 months. That gave DH enough time to do ulpan and look for a job. But we came knowing he would definitely get a job. If you can definitely get a job (though almost no one gets before they come so don't stress about that) with earning potential of 8000 that sounds doable, even with RBS rent. RBS has good public transport and if you can manage without a car that would help.

A 3 year old is in government funded gan already, so minimal or no fees. In my area (not RBS) tzaharon is about 300 a month. 3 is also a perfect age to come - the language transition is normally very easy. For my kids who came at 6 and 5, the first year was very hard, but in 2 years they were completely integrated and doing well in school.

A social network is crucial! Definitely go to where you have friends.
בהצלחה!
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 28 2020, 6:03 am
Aylat wrote:
We made aliya with 4 kids and lived off sal klita at first. We stayed in a (barely bigger than) studio apartment belonging to family and didn't pay rent for 5 months. That gave DH enough time to do ulpan and look for a job. But we came knowing he would definitely get a job. If you can definitely get a job (though almost no one gets before they come so don't stress about that) with earning potential of 8000 that sounds doable, even with RBS rent. RBS has good public transport and if you can manage without a car that would help.

A 3 year old is in government funded gan already, so minimal or no fees. In my area (not RBS) tzaharon is about 300 a month. 3 is also a perfect age to come - the language transition is normally very easy. For my kids who came at 6 and 5, the first year was very hard, but in 2 years they were completely integrated and doing well in school.

A social network is crucial! Definitely go to where you have friends.
בהצלחה!
Wow, thats amazing Smile when I made aliyah almost 20 years ago, the sal klita was enough to HELP with rent, but that was it. In other words, it was nothing to live off of. I guess the amounts are higher now.
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