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Forum
-> Household Management
amother
OP
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 9:25 am
A while ago, I had a cleaning lady who asked me to find her extra work. I know someone in the neighborhood (Mrs. X) that is always looking, so I told the cleaning lady her name - as soon as she heard the name Mrs. X, she said = "oh, no - no one wants to work for her, she's not nice".
I wasn't sure what to do with that information, so I kind of dismissed it.
Now I have a different cleaning lady, and we are trying to fill up her schedule, so Mrs. X is taking a lot of her hours, and called me up to work on scheduling - while I was on the phone with Mrs. X, I hear her commanding this cleaning lady what to do - no "please" or "thank you" whatsoever and she was using a quite nasty tone of voice. I'm worried that the cleaning lady will just quit on all of us if she's not treated properly by Mrs. X.
WWYD?
I wish I had a cute like article type of thing on "how to keep cleaning help happy", that I could text to Mrs. X, saying something like "isn't this cute - hope it works for us!", kind of hint, hint?
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happyone
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:24 am
keep your own happy that's all in your control .
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zaq
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:31 am
I would not refer anyone to Mrs. X. Period. There are plenty of other dirty houses in the world.
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amother
Pewter
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:36 am
That why I’m so careful who I refer my lady to.
Some people treat them so nasty.
I treat mine like a human and like a huge help in my home.
Food, drinks, few minutes of sitting down, extra pay, holiday bonuses etc
Just continue treating her nice.
I always make sure to inquire by her if the other homes are good work, if it’s working out there, etc
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amother
Jetblack
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:38 am
Anyone with full time help needs to make sure they are following labor laws. Otherwise she can sue you for back pay in a few years and win.
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thunderstorm
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:42 am
amother [ Jetblack ] wrote: | Anyone with full time help needs to make sure they are following labor laws. Otherwise she can sue you for back pay in a few years and win. |
Anyone with any help needs to make sure that they are mentchlich to their help, whether there are labor laws or not. Just because they clean your toilet doesn’t mean they should be treated like they are the toilet.
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groovy1224
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:46 am
Unfornately even if you sent such an article, I doubt she'd listen. The people who need such advice the most are the least likely to pay attention. Being kind and respectful to your cleaning help is kind of a given to any normal, decent person.
I doubt your cleaning lady would quit on you because of someone else though, she can just quit Mrs. X. The sad reality though is that she might need the money bad enough to put up with her behavior.
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amother
Seafoam
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:46 am
Ask cleaning lady regularly if she's happy and ok by all her jobs.
That's what I do.
If she's not happy you can tell mrs x she doesn't want to work for you anymore.
If she doesn't complain, don't mix in!
I do remind everybody to offer some food every single time she comes to them.
(I had someone complain to me about why does she have to give her a sandwich when really lady from before should.... )
I took it for granted that you have to be nice to your cleaning help,experience has shown me otherwise!! It's sad!
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Ruchel
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:47 am
Follow laws, be a human, don't be a friend to an employee. BH my ladies love me because I'm never on their back, but I am not going to feed anyone or to befriend anyone.
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amother
Violet
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 10:58 am
I also know someone who treats her help poorly, so I never refer anyone to her when she asks. I don't want that on my head.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 11:23 am
Thanks all for your responses. The problem is that this lady will quit on everyone if we don't "fill up her schedule" (or if she gets a full time job elsewhere) and Mrs. X is willing to take a large amount of hours. I'm not really able to find other people that want slots, everyone seems to have help already...
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amother
Pearl
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 11:45 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Thanks all for your responses. The problem is that this lady will quit on everyone if we don't "fill up her schedule" (or if she gets a full time job elsewhere) and Mrs. X is willing to take a large amount of hours. I'm not really able to find other people that want slots, everyone seems to have help already... |
You are not going to change Mrs. X. All you will do is alienate her from you if you send her the article.
Either you will find someone else who needs hours or the cleaning lady will. There aren't so many people that can afford fulltime help.
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amother
Coffee
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 11:48 am
Ruchel wrote: | Follow laws, be a human, don't be a friend to an employee. BH my ladies love me because I'm never on their back, but I am not going to feed anyone or to befriend anyone. |
There's nothing wrong with being friendly.
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ShishKabob
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 11:49 am
You can only control that what is in your control. Whatever help you are meant to have will come to you, whether with or without Mrs. X. This lady may just drop you like a hot potato if she finds other arrangements with or without Mrs. X's added schedule.
Hashem should give you clarity to deal with this the right way.
Bhatzlocha
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Ruchel
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 11:52 am
amother [ Coffee ] wrote: | There's nothing wrong with being friendly. |
If we happened to become friends, sure. But for now I haven't felt the desire. I haven't also befriended most people I worked with. I'd be very wary of someone who asks you to fill their schedule.
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Amarante
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 12:06 pm
I think sending a booklet to Mrs, X would backfire. In my experience, people who are nasty don't think they are nasty so she would think you have a lot of nerve to do something like that.
In terms of helping my cleaning woman - if she is good - I would make it a point to ask people if they needed someone to clean so that she would have clients besides Mrs. X.
I would also try to make her aware that if she doesn't want to work for Mrs. X she shouldn't feel obligated to and that you are happy to continue to employ her.
In my experience, full time cleaning help/housekeepers and hourly jobs are really different. No matter how many clients you find for her, if she wants to be a full time housekeeper and the right job comes along she will take it because in general it's easier to be a housekeeper and less stressful - you know where you are going every week - you know that you have a regular pay check coming in and in general it's easier to perform housekeeping stuff when you work there full time versus the hard type of cleaning everyone wants their hourly cleaning lady to do. A housekeeper doesn't scrub toilets every day - an hourly cleaning lady is doing the hardest stuff (kitchen and bathrooms) multiple times a day or week.
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amother
Seafoam
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 12:56 pm
I don't think there's anything wrong with giving hints to mrs x that cleaning help mentioned that she's not happy and "we" have to treat her extra well or else she wil look for another job!!
And if she's really clueless you can give her examples: please give her food, thank her a few times for coming, compliment her on a job well done... after all you are not calling to criticize her, you are helping her keep her cleaning help!!
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amother
Pearl
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 12:57 pm
amother [ Seafoam ] wrote: | I don't think there's anything wrong with giving hints to mrs x that cleaning help mentioned that she's not happy and "we" have to treat her extra well or else she wil look for another job!!
And if she's really clueless you can give her examples: please give her food, thank her a few times for coming, compliment her on a job well done... after all you are not calling to criticize her, you are helping her keep her cleaning help!! |
Ain't going to help.
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gamanit
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Mon, Dec 09 2019, 1:24 pm
I just wanted to say that unfortunately cleaning help is too used to being treated poorly. I once got cleaning help from amazon services when they had a special. When the woman came to my house I asked her if she wants anything to eat or drink before she starts working. She told me that I was the first person to offer her that all day (and this was in the late afternoon). It's always important to remember to be a mentch and treat everyone with respect.
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