My dd10 is always BORED

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children

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amother

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 4:09 pm

Dd10 is so bored always. She cries from boredom. I dont know what to do. I have tried to get her into things ... art, cartooning, sewing, etc but she's not interested in those type of things. I'm reluctant to introduce computer games.... ideas people? I'm at a loss. Shes a little artsy, a little creative, very social, not motivated.

ra_mom

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 4:15 pm

Does she have neighbors she can socialize with? And classmates she can invite once a week after school?

Rachel8177

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 5:19 pm

My daughter this age is lately obsessed with puzzles. The dollar store has quite a variety of 300 and 500 piece puzzles and we've accumulated a nice collection by now

Rutabaga

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 5:57 pm

Is she a reader?

Does she enjoy cooking or baking? I know a few girls that age or a bit older that got very into cake decorating and even do a little business making fancy cakes and cupcakes for family and friends.

gold21

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 6:00 pm

Did u try teaching her an instrument? Like getting lessons?

amother

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 8:43 pm

She refuses to do puzzles . Hates them.
We tried piano and guitar lessons both, she wasn't into it and never wanted to practice
She usually doesn't want to bake... maybe if I bake for her she would decorate.... I will definitely try this route. Thanks
She is super sociable but kids dont usually come over on school nights... maybe I should encourage that more.

srbmom

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 10:03 pm

My DD close to that age has a playdate every single day! Yes, it makes it a little harder to get everything done before bed, but it's the only way we stay sane - she needs constant socializing

#BestBubby

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 10:04 pm

Would she like a Jewish children's magazine?

If you read aloud your favorite books, maybe she will get into reading.

dankbar

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 10:14 pm

Craft kits

Educational puzzle games for one player like rush hour or other

gameboy

pen pal

She can organize some activity among the neighbors or in community
like carnivals, plays, bake sale

Volunteer

Jewelry making.

Painting.

amother

Red

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 10:16 pm

What about calling friends and shmoozing on the phone?

amother

Tangerine

Wed, Dec 18 2019, 10:24 pm

Does she do any extracurricular activities? Would she be interested in drama?

I know extra classes can be expensive, but maybe you could start a Sunday Funday group in your neighborhood. It's kind of like a round robin for older kids. We did this for years for our oldest and it worked out very nicely. Depending on availability, we had somewhere between 8-12 girls per round. Each family hosted once per round and was in charge of the activity and snack and basically keeping the kids entertained for 2 hours. Most people did some type of craft project, but some were more creative and did scavenger hunts or cupcake wars or whatever. We had a nice mix of girls from a few schools, which was nice because they got to hang out with a different group of friends than during the week and they might not have gotten to know each other otherwise.

amother

Green

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 2:59 am

Gosh! My daughter has no time to be bored! She has a crazy amount of homework and tests... no breaks!

mfb

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 4:06 am

Try something with more action like a dance class, gym, aerobics... maybe she needs to move more and that’s why all the activities you tried she doesn’t want to do.

amother

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 4:24 am

She already takes dance on Sunday and reads for a few hours every day.... magazines last her 30 min, she reads right through and shes done.

amother

Lilac

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 5:55 am

does she help out at all? my 9 year old can scramble eggs, cut up cucumbers... for dinner and she often is happy to do it.

amother

Salmon

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 6:12 am

In our house "I'm bored" is code for "I'm feeling really anxious".

amother

Azure

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 6:16 am

I second the anxiety remark.... when a 10 year old is bored they are feeling anxious

renslet

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 7:09 am

On a school night? Between dinner, homework, unwinding and relaxing, she's bored? Every night? From my experience that usually means that there's something going on inside my head so I just want to keep busy so I don't have to think about it.
I have a child around that age who right before bedtime would transform into someone who fought with her siblings (who she got along with great the rest of the time) and act nuts.
A therapist who we consulted suggested that she was scared of being alone with her thoughts in the dark in bed.
We started a system that after bedtime, story etc one parent went into her room every five minutes. Quick hug and kiss and after two three times she was asleep.
I believe kids should be bored, it fires up their imagination and gets them to figure out what they enjoy doing.
This seems to me like a deeper issue

Ruchel

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 8:41 am

amother [ Salmon ] wrote:

In our house "I'm bored" is code for "I'm feeling really anxious".

Weird. Really not here

Hashem_Yaazor

Thu, Dec 19 2019, 8:44 am

amother [ Azure ] wrote:

I second the anxiety remark.... when a 10 year old is bored they are feeling anxious

I think it may be true in some cases, but definitely not all.

There are some kids who just aren't creative enough to self-entertain or really feel a need for socializing and being at home no matter how many activities there are won't fill that need for energizing themselves.

And in my home, usually I'm hungry means I'm bored. I wouldn't say I'm hungry -> I'm bored -> I'm anxious. Some kids just do not know where to begin entertaining themselves.
Some might be overwhelmed with too many possibilities. Some might not be enticed by any.

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