The Commercialization of Chanukah

ectomorph

Mon, Dec 23 2019, 1:50 pm

amother [ Brunette ] wrote:

Not to take away from your point, but I really dislike when BTs put frum people on a pedestal and expect them to shun materialism because that’s one of the things that drew them to religion. We’re just regular normal people who are finding our way, and yes some of us are more materialistic than others, but we didn’t ask to be idealized.

I'm not a BT.

And I completely disagree. We are supposed to be a light unto the nations. It is very much a problem when we don't live up to our ideals - in fact that's why we are in Galus.

amother

Orchid

Mon, Dec 23 2019, 2:18 pm

pause wrote:

You sound like a really good parent!

FTR, each of my kids' gifts cost less than $36 that your kids get. As I said, my kids wouldn't know what to do with money like that; they appreciate "things" rather than cash and have no concept of how much things cost.

Oh, I didn't mean to imply that it's my way or the highway! We do gelt only because it's our minhag. I'm not morally opposed to gifts, but I am morally opposed to conspicuous consumption and extreme consumerism, so it's all in how it's done, IMO. The thing I like about gelt is that beyond being special, it teaches the kids to give money from it to tzedaka, saving, etc. So several valuable lessons in a relatively small package! I will say the drawback is keeping everyone's money organized in their own wallets. Our kids never ask for anything in terms of toys or "things" so as much as the money doesn't mean much to them, neither are they wanting toys. At least the money will provide them with short-term lessons and long-term value. At the rate they're going, they'll have enough to cover their own canteen and living costs when they leave home! LOL

I definitely knew that my parents couldn't afford things growing up, and I am not scarred for life. Again, it's how you go about communicating it to them, but I absolutely do not think there's anything wrong with a kid knowing their parent can't afford to keep up with the Joneses. And I would also encourage those who can not to, just so their kids can learn by example. When I was a kid, our rewards were mitzvot ("What a good job you did! You get to go to shul with Abba!" or "because you did ____ so nicely, I'm going to take you to the old folks' home to spend time with them!" stuff like that....) That may sound cheesy, but because of the importance placed on these activities, they were exciting for us and a real treat, and that is something that I hope to impart to my own children as well. I find the more time one spends doing and being in service of others, the less time one has to focus on what others have and what one is "lacking".

pause

Mon, Dec 23 2019, 4:22 pm

amother [ Orchid ] wrote:

As I wrote before, you sound really thoughtful and special, as a parent and as a person. Kol hakavod!

avrahamama

Mon, Dec 23 2019, 5:14 pm

What do you mean by decorations? Like Xmas lights and a big blow up menorah on your lawn??? Or just a couple of streamers and happy Hanukkah signs?

Making the house look festive to get the kids pumped is fun.

I don't really like the gift thing. But maybe that's because I'm poor. lol ... Or maybe because I just think that takes away from mitzvah of menorah when kids want to run to the gifts as soon and candle lighting is over. And talk about presents instead of minhagim.

But I decorate for pesach and loooove that too. And we do afikomen present. But we never spend more than a certain amount. And we make it clear that things that require spending without much meaning connected to it are not our thing in our house.

mo5

Tue, Dec 24 2019, 8:02 am

[quote="mommy9"]

southernbubby wrote:

There is an inyan on Chanukah to publicize the miracle so Chabad puts giant menorahs on cars and in public places.

Just to set the record straight, that's not how chazal said to publicize the miracle. They said to light one light. We do more than that and light eight.

To clarify setting the record straight, lighting every night, either one or increasing is not for pirsumei Nisa, putting it at the opening of the door to outside (paraphrasing the Gemara) is.
A public menorah takes the concept of pirsumei nisa one step further.

Amarante

Tue, Dec 24 2019, 1:58 pm

Am I the only one who finds it kind of ironic that we now have achieved parity with Xtians who have complained about the over-commercialization of Xmas for many years LOL

There was an article recently on how Xmas trees have become a race to the top with some of the most expensive artificial ones costing upwards of several thousand dollars Very Happy

There are people whose utility bills soar into thousands in December because of the huge number of lights on their homes. Smile