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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
Biggest fear send ds to public school bc no yeshiva accepts
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:14 pm
My son has iep so no yeshiva will accept him. He is going into pre1a. If I would've known the yeshivos would not accept him, I would've had him in a regular class getting services.....

Anyway, the yeshiva I applied to is hesitant and dont want to accept him and now all schools are filled up.
My last resort is to beg the man in charge of the organization that places "public school kids" into yeshiva, to help me place my son into yeshiva...but he may not help me...

Wow....this is ridiculous.. on chanukah when we are celebrating that as jews we were able to still keep the torah despite the Greeks trying not to let us...

So now my son will have to go to boyish school?? If no school can service my son,
Bec the class is "too big", then is there any Jewish school to service him or do I need to send him to public school??

My son is well behaved and very smart but with his services, they label him and there are a lot of kids who need ieps and dont get services, yet they are accepted bec they are not labeled....well, I'm stuck...and angry..
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octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:18 pm
Im in bklyn and if you are receiving services you have an IEP. Many, many kids have ieps and attend yeshiva and bais yaakov. Its not a big deal at all.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:35 pm
It's a big deal bec he is getting services in a small class now so his teacher tells everyone he is great and....BUT SHE THINKS A LARGE CLASS IS TOO BIG .....FOR HIM SO AT THE INTERVIEW, THEY ARE IMPRESSED but AFTER speaking to the teacher, they dont want him...my other child has an iep and I also had a lot of trouble but eventually I bh got him into a different school....however, they forced him to repeat pre1a, and he was in a large class for upk so they didnt refuse to accept it.

Now, the school won't accept him bec of his small setting...but I dont know a Jewish school with such small classes and the two I know of are already filled by now (they obviously cant take more kids bec they want to keep classes small...)

So I'm stuck...
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amother
Navy


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:40 pm
Maybe oorah can help him get into yeshivah even with a scholarship
Years ago camp Magen avraham has kids from public school attend for free
My kids went to public school in seventh thru High school which had Jewish clubs and ncsy they went to good colleges and are ver successful
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:49 pm
I can really relate. I had my son in yeshiva and had to put him in a semi jewish theraputic program for second grade. It was one of the hardest decisions we had to make. He really was not doing well in his class of 20 boys. He needed a lot more social and emotional support and a class of 20 with one rebbe was not going to give it to him so we switched him for second grade. I think he did gain from the small class and he learned a lot of good skills to take back to yeshiva in 3rd grade but it was not an easy year.

I have a friend whose son was in the same theraputic program. He started there from K and never went to yeshiva. When she started to transition him she found he needed a shadow to learn to be in a class of 20 boys. Is that something you are willing to consider? It will be a huge adjustment for your son to go from a small supportive special program to a large class with one rebbe and not a lot of support.
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amother
Wine


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:51 pm
I realize this might not be what you want to hear but perhaps the teacher is correct in terms of his needing to be in a class that meets his needs.

I believe there is an ima with twins with special needs whose children are thriving in a public school setting because they are receiving exactly the kinds of intensive services that enable them to thrive.
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esuss




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 4:57 pm
Where do you live? Maybe someone can suggest something based on your location.
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amother
Aqua


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 5:03 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote:
I realize this might not be what you want to hear but perhaps the teacher is correct in terms of his needing to be in a class that meets his needs.

I believe there is an ima with twins with special needs whose children are thriving in a public school setting because they are receiving exactly the kinds of intensive services that enable them to thrive.


Totally don't agree.

I had this with one of my kids and we ended up sending to a new school (that was willing to take a chance) because of this. This child did fine in school.

What makes this young special ed teacher such an expert? I find they overdramatize problems.
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octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 5:34 pm
Well that's not nice of the teacher. Can she predict the future? Why is she sabotaging your child chances? Can you complain about her?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 5:46 pm
mha3484 wrote:
I can really relate. I had my son in yeshiva and had to put him in a semi jewish theraputic program for second grade. It was one of the hardest decisions we had to make. He really was not doing well in his class of 20 boys. He needed a lot more social and emotional support and a class of 20 with one rebbe was not going to give it to him so we switched him for second grade. I think he did gain from the small class and he learned a lot of good skills to take back to yeshiva in 3rd grade but it was not an easy year.

I have a friend whose son was in the same theraputic program. He started there from K and never went to yeshiva. When she started to transition him she found he needed a shadow to learn to be in a class of 20 boys. Is that something you are willing to consider? It will be a huge adjustment for your son to go from a small supportive special program to a large class with one rebbe and not a lot of support.



What is a semi therapeutic program? I live in queens and never heard of such thing??

Maybe you can provide more details??

Thanks for your post.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 5:48 pm
I am in Chicago. Our JCFS runs a therapeutic school made up primarily of public school students but it has two classes of jewish kids of a variety of observance levels. Its very light on the Judaic studies part of the day. So its jewish but not like being in a day school or yeshiva setting.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 5:58 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote:
I realize this might not be what you want to hear but perhaps the teacher is correct in terms of his needing to be in a class that meets his needs.

I believe there is an ima with twins with special needs whose children are thriving in a public school setting because they are receiving exactly the kinds of intensive services that enable them to thrive.


The teacher may be correct and may be incorrect(as the mom above posted her experience) ...but I'm a great mom and I work with my son teaching him....etc so I think she's incorrect...and like I said they were impressed by the INTERVIEW but If he is accepted and doesn't do well then I'd be forced to find him a different place..

But, while I don't mind opposite views here, I must ask you to clarify so I can understand where you are coming from.

Are you someone who is not opposed to sending to public school?

And what does it mean to "not do well in a large class"??

When I asked that ques to the admin. deciding if he will be accepted, that admin. Couldnt answer except to say the teacher said it's too big!!

So, my thoughts are "majority of kids are not doing well" based on the behavior issues my other kids tell me happen or based on the fact that some children cant read on grade level...etc.. sorry, but not every child will be A in EVERYTHING!! (My dd that is good at everything had no trouble getting into school bec that's what schools want "perfection")

I'm interested in hearing what your answers are bec when I questioned the teacher, I asked her and she said "bec he is delayed in...and ..." but yes he is very smart, and behaves well...etc...sorry, but my son doesn't have "real special ed issues"...

In public schools, there's a concept of least restrictive environment so it is possible for different teachers/administrators to disagree. People have different views.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:01 pm
amother [ Navy ] wrote:
Maybe oorah can help him get into yeshivah even with a scholarship
Years ago camp Magen avraham has kids from public school attend for free
My kids went to public school in seventh thru High school which had Jewish clubs and ncsy they went to good colleges and are ver successful


Good idea...I have a different kiruv organization that are talking about how they help public school kids get into yeshiva so I'll have to ask them to help me....I'll see if they change their mind after finding about an iep??
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:04 pm
mha3484 wrote:
I am in Chicago. Our JCFS runs a therapeutic school made up primarily of public school students but it has two classes of jewish kids of a variety of observance levels. Its very light on the Judaic studies part of the day. So its jewish but not like being in a day school or yeshiva setting.


Ok well I'm in queens in ny but thanks for the info.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:05 pm
I can give you some examples of not doing well.

My type of child does great academically but struggles socially and behaviorally. He got a lot of in the moment social coaching that helped him a lot. There is no way in a large class to be constantly redirecting him.

I have a friend who has a son a year ahead of mine where the classes are 28 kids each and not easy boys. She almost repeated her son one year because he was overwhelmed by the class size, spacy and not learning the material. The rebbe could not give him enough attention with 27 other boys and no teacher assistant.

You know your kid the best and should do what is the best for him. I am just giving a different perspective.
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:05 pm
The teacher is completely out of place. Have you spoken to her about the issue?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:12 pm
octopus wrote:
Well that's not nice of the teacher. Can she predict the future? Why is she sabotaging your child chances? Can you complain about her?


She is nice and doesn't understand our school process. Can you tell me what I can say to her In a nice, non threatening way ??? I feel like I'm stuck bec every school wants to speak to her (bec she is his teacher now) and I do understand she has a right to tell them her true view....I did tell her already that I spoke to the administrator and he told me what she said and I was surprised....but she still defends her views and I do understand that she has a right to say "she feels he would succeed in a small setting " and I have a right to say "I disagree" but clearly the administrator is deciding to use her words as a "heavier weight" than the interview....

Unfortunately this is a fact of life, labels and references can ruin ppls chances of school acceptances, shidduchim...etc even if the person had a good interview /date..

It just bothers me bec the admin said "no, he shouldn't go to public school but try to get him into a smaller setting..." but easy for him to say, everything is booked or won't accept him for the same reason!!
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nicole81




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:21 pm
BH you're in NYC. If you can't get your child into a mainstream yeshiva, there are a lot of special ed options in NY. For example, YESS is located inside of YCQ, has small classes, and aims to mainstream students. You can also try mainstream and sped schools in the Five Towns.
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naturalmom5




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 6:57 pm
It all depends on the child, the home, and the problem

My 2 boys were forced to go to ps for a few years in elementary and then again in the 2nd half of high school

Bh, hasdi Hashem , they both ended much more solidly frum than their peers who stayed in the yeshivas they went to

Both went to very serious gap year bais medrash programs
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amother
Coral


 

Post Tue, Dec 24 2019, 7:11 pm
I'm not sure what your sons issues are but I am very happy in ohr dovid school in brooklyn/flatbush
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