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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Infants
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amother
OP
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 Wed, Jan 08 2020, 2:23 pm
She is 4 weeks and will only sleep in my bed or my arms. I tried rocking her in the carriage (it has a bassinet) and the car seat but she won’t sleep in those either  . At this point I am seriously sleep deprived. Any ideas how to get her to sleep?
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amother
Ginger
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:12 pm
You might want to just co-sleep. I co-slept with all of my kids and got wonderful nights' sleep (at least in the newborn stage!).
Once you can nurse lying down, you're golden. You don't have to fully wake up to nurse baby and you can both sleep through the night.
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amother
Mint
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:13 pm
| amother [ Ginger ] wrote: | You might want to just co-sleep. I co-slept with all of my kids and got wonderful nights' sleep (at least in the newborn stage!).
Once you can nurse lying down, you're golden. You don't have to fully wake up to nurse baby and you can both sleep through the night. |
Co sleeping is very dangerous. There's a risk of chas v'shalom smothering the child. Because so many people do it, it doesn't make it less dangerous.
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amother
Hotpink
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:15 pm
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Dock a tot or snuggle me organic. Put one of them inside a crib. Gives the baby a very secure feeling
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amother
Ginger
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:21 pm
| amother [ Mint ] wrote: | | Co sleeping is very dangerous. There's a risk of chas v'shalom smothering the child. Because so many people do it, it doesn't make it less dangerous. |
RESPONSIBLE co-sleeping (no heavy blankets, relatively firm mattress, only one adult in bed, mother not on drugs, and not the kind of person that falls out of bed in the middle of the night) is perfectly safe.
If you have enough self awareness in your sleep not to wet the bed or roll onto the floor, you have enough self-awareness not to smother your baby accidentally.
If you are still concerned, there are co-sleepers that attach to your bed, sort of a crib sidecar for your bed.
Mothers who fall asleep sitting up in chairs to nurse in the middle of the night can drop their newborns. That's dangerous too. So are sleep-deprived parents who make terrible errors in judgment.
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amother
Mint
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:23 pm
| amother [ Ginger ] wrote: | RESPONSIBLE co-sleeping (no heavy blankets, relatively firm mattress, only one adult in bed, mother not on drugs, and not the kind of person that falls out of bed in the middle of the night) is perfectly safe.
If you have enough self awareness in your sleep not to wet the bed or roll onto the floor, you have enough self-awareness not to smother your baby accidentally.
If you are still concerned, there are co-sleepers that attach to your bed, sort of a crib sidecar for your bed.
Mothers who fall asleep sitting up in chairs to nurse in the middle of the night can drop their newborns. That's dangerous too. So are sleep-deprived parents who make terrible errors in judgment. |
It has nothing to do with self awareness in the sleep. Any tiny move from mother or baby can be dangerous for baby. Everyone moves in their sleep.
And it doesn't matter if you use a light or heavy blanket, any blanket can go over baby's face and suffocate baby.
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amother
Wine
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:32 pm
| amother [ Ginger ] wrote: | RESPONSIBLE co-sleeping (no heavy blankets, relatively firm mattress, only one adult in bed, mother not on drugs, and not the kind of person that falls out of bed in the middle of the night) is perfectly safe.
If you have enough self awareness in your sleep not to wet the bed or roll onto the floor, you have enough self-awareness not to smother your baby accidentally.
If you are still concerned, there are co-sleepers that attach to your bed, sort of a crib sidecar for your bed.
Mothers who fall asleep sitting up in chairs to nurse in the middle of the night can drop their newborns. That's dangerous too. So are sleep-deprived parents who make terrible errors in judgment. |
You also need to put the baby in the crook of your elbow so that you cannot accidentally roll over. If you do it right you physically cannot roll over since you don't have enough control of your arms in your sleep. You don't get the same amount of sleep as when the baby sleeps in a crib/bassinet but it's better than nothing. Personally I put my babies on their stomachs in their bassinet because otherwise I don't get any sleep and beyond tired parents is actually the biggest risk factor for SIDS.
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mha3484
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 3:36 pm
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What kind of mattress do you have? I find that a lot of crib mattresses are super thin and not comfortable for the baby. If you can get something thicker it can make a big difference.
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amother
Ginger
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 4:09 pm
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amother
Bronze
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 4:18 pm
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Cosleeping has many benefits. One of them is that the mother's breathing pattern "reminds" the baby to breathe too. Sometimes babies chv forget to breathe so I feel this is safer.
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 5:36 pm
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This sounds like me with each of my kids. I end up cosleeping. Sometimes my dh tries to move the baby once he is in a deep enough of a sleep but he is not always successful.
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avrahamama
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 6:01 pm
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Did you burp and swaddle?
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trixx
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 6:04 pm
| amother [ Hotpink ] wrote: | | Dock a tot or snuggle me organic. Put one of them inside a crib. Gives the baby a very secure feeling |
This is more dangerous than safe cosleeping.
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amother
Natural
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 6:13 pm
I'm a cosleeper... even in the hospital. Your baby is in the 4th trimester. Doesnt need, know or want anyone but you, her mom. You are what makes her feel safe and at home.
Shes so new ... I'd say train her later on.
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amother
Aqua
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 6:22 pm
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My baby wouldn't sleep laying flat on his back or on his stomach either. Or in the stroller or in the car seat or anywhere else. So for the first few months I put him on a boppy type of pillow in his crib. Lifesaver. It says on it not to use for sleeping but I used it safely. It was very snug between the bars of his cradle. I only used it for as long as he was not able to move himself in any sort of direction. The day he flipped over for the first time I stopped using it. At that point he was ok on his back.
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amother
Copper
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Wed, Jan 08 2020, 7:30 pm
Here’s another vote for burping and swaddling well.
Also throw your pajama shirt from the night before into baby’s crib...not loose, I put it on the bassinet mattress like a sheet so baby can be comforted from your smell.
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