Are you guilty of apologizing?

yo'ma

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 9:22 am

Isn’t it sad that we, in general, feel like we have to apologize for our actions or other things? I’m guilty of it too. I apologize for my messy house, for my kids behavior, for being on time or other things that are not in my control or I should be proud of.

Yesterday, I had an encounter (you know who you are Smile

) with someone and she was apologizing that she sends her child to a babysitter when he comes home from school. If that’s what’s best for her, no need to apologize especially to me and who am I to judge anyway? I have been working on myself not to judge others and not to apologize for everything.

What do you think? Are you guilty of apologizing? Are you one of the people who judge others?

When I say apologizing, I mean feeling the need to explain yourself.

trixx

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 9:55 am

Yes, even just saying sorry instead of excuse me when you bump into someone - or better yet someone else does the bumping- women are statistically likely to apologize. Also at work having to apologize for having an idea

amother

Lavender

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 11:37 am

My MIL constantly apologises when I come over that the house is messy. It totally isn't. It looks like a warm home where people live normally and sometimes children play with toys/crafts! Drives me mad cos after every few sentences shell mention it again. Its very hard to enjoy my time there when I know shes so preoccupied with what I think about her house - and I'm married a while already

amother

Pink

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 1:41 pm

Im in middle of replacing an (expensive) item for a customer that shes unhappy with. The company says it completely normal wear and tear and I agree but its someone I dont want to strain the relationship so im replacing it. Were in the process of choosing something new and I find myself non stop apologizing for "needing " to replace it TMI

amother

Coral

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 1:45 pm

My MIL apologizes for everything. Everything. For my kid having a dirty diaper to the weather outside to the drinks at the table. Drives me crazyyyy!

amother

Copper

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 1:53 pm

My sis is the king of apologizing. It's the joke of my family.

Just last night she told she will help with something and then she got busy with other stuff.
she txted me "I'm soo sorry..." seriously. your doing me the favor, no need to apologize...

cozyblanket

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 2:02 pm

trixx wrote:

I agree with most examples on the thread, but apologizing for bumping into someone makes sense. I'm really sorry that I wasn't being more careful or looking where I was going or I'm apologizing that I was so distracted. That would be an appropriate time to apologize.

But oh my, who would apologize for having a good idea? Can you explain when you've heard that?

amother

Forestgreen

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 5:51 pm

yo'ma wrote:

People who do that obviously feel guilty and they feel like they’re doing the wrong thing and they need to justify it to other people and themselves

amother

Royalblue

Thu, Feb 13 2020, 7:54 pm

I’m a huge apologizer and definitely working on it, I’ve gotten much better over the years. I think it comes from my “people pleasing” character.