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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Purim
It's not fair!
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:31 pm
I got a babysitter so I can go to megillah in peace and a woman brought 3 kids under 4 and while the kids behaved well for their ages, this woman made a racket keeping them quiet. Now I need to find a way to hear again. Sigh.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:35 pm
This is my biggest Purim Pet Peeve. Shuls should have a kids' program so the adults can hear the megillah in peace. In America the shuls I went to did that, and then the volunteers got a later reading when the kids had all gone home. It doesn't seem to be a thing in Israel, though.
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flowers12345




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:35 pm
That's life. Tip for you: if you miss a word of the megillah you can say it to yourself quietly and still be yotzei
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amother
Crimson


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:35 pm
Yikes! That's so unfair. I get it being hard for her to get out, but what does she gain by bringing them- did she even get to hear it? And now she ruined it for you. Is there anyone who can come to your house to read for you? Or a friend you can bring your kids to and have a reading for both of you?
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amother
Babyblue


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:38 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I got a babysitter so I can go to megillah in peace and a woman brought 3 kids under 4 and while the kids behaved well for their ages, this woman made a racket keeping them quiet. Now I need to find a way to hear again. Sigh.


Same happened to me. 11 year old kid sitting next to me jumping and fidgeting and whispering the entire time. Kept on missing words.

Ladies, PLEASE. For everyone else sake, don't bring your kids unless you're absolutely sure they can sit perfectly still and quiet. It just isn't fair.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:42 pm
flowers12345 wrote:
That's life. Tip for you: if you miss a word of the megillah you can say it to yourself quietly and still be yotzei


What if you miss entire sentences, or even paragraphs?

There's nothing like having a 3 year old yelling "IMA, IMA, IMA!" through the whole thing, while the mom zones out, and the 4 year old is kicking the back of your chair.

The men's section would never put up with that kind of behavior, so why should the women be subject to it?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:49 pm
We have plenty of kids readings here. The problem was honestly more the mother than the kids. They were pretty quiet, she went nuts every time they crinkled a wrapper. I know I can say words when I miss but I missed too many to catch up.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 1:54 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We have plenty of kids readings here. The problem was honestly more the mother than the kids. They were pretty quiet, she went nuts every time they crinkled a wrapper. I know I can say words when I miss but I missed too many to catch up.


If she was so busy "shushing", she probably missed half the megillah herself.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 3:47 pm
FranticFrummie wrote:
If she was so busy "shushing", she probably missed half the megillah herself.


She did, but didn't seem concerned. I caught another reading, just upset that I hired a babysitter and was so organized but it wasn't enough
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amother
Tan


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 3:57 pm
Not to belittle OP's problem. I do sympathize. But where I live, almost all of the school-aged kids are quarantined. Including mine.

No kids. No carnivals. No costumes. No seudas.

I promise not to complain about noise next year.
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amother
Silver


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 4:23 pm
flowers12345 wrote:
That's life. Tip for you: if you miss a word of the megillah you can say it to yourself quietly and still be yotzei

No, what's real life is realizing you can't expect to go to a megillah reading with several little kids. Period. Unfair to others and extremely stressful. I've been in readings where there was full on running around and screaming of toddlers (and just saying a word or two to yourself doesn't suffice) yet mom sat there refusing to take her kid out because *she* didn't want to miss the reading. I've been in readings where the leiner stopped multiple times because of the same kid crying loudly so it was even audible and disruptive in the men's.
That is rude, disrespectful to others, and probably considered stealing because of all those who had to go to an additional reading (including those who probably had to pay extra babysitting fees). It is NOT ok. FF, these were in America. It's not just Israeli.
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amother
Seashell


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 4:29 pm
you should talk to a rabbi because the whole "hearing thing" is more lenient that you might think.
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amother
Silver


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 4:34 pm
Um my father is a leiner who has leined megillah in shuls for years and is very well versed in this. Big difference between saying a pasuk or two to yourself and a huge chunk of text while you can't hear what is being read because your scrambling to catch up mumbling several pesukim from a few minutes prior. Which has happened to me. Due to noisy kids.
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 4:36 pm
Kids crying is one thing. Please do not allow your child to bring explosives to shul.
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Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 5:01 pm
DH goes to the early reading and watches the boys and little kids for the ladies reading. Is that so unheard of?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 5:10 pm
Really the noise doesn't bother me that much. I'm a young mom too, I have babies and toddlers and I made arrangements so that I would actually hear the megillah instead of spending the reading dealing with my crying kids. It's the attitude that frustrates me, I totally understand you want your kids to have the experience but if they make noise, take them out.
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Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 5:15 pm
Also IMO, only kids who can read should go. Starting between ages 5-7 or even later if they can’t sit still.
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SixOfWands




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 5:23 pm
amother [ Cyan ] wrote:
Kids crying is one thing. Please do not allow your child to bring explosives to shul.


This is clearly a story I need to hear.
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 6:24 pm
SixOfWands wrote:
This is clearly a story I need to hear.

There are two types of people who bring explosives to shul: Terrorists, and annoying kids who need to set off firecrackers every time the name "Haman" is said, plus a few at other times.
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Amelia Bedelia




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 10 2020, 7:15 pm
People seem to think that the special women's readings are meant for children. No! They are meant for women to go at an alternate time, when her husband or neighbor/relative/older child/hired babysitter can babysit.
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