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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Purim
Until what time at night is it normal to have a loud party
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:30 am
SixOfWands wrote:
There's no need to sing so loud at midnight that the neighbors not only can hear, but are annoyed. You can party at reasonable decibel levels, you know.


We're not talking about rock music and screaming off of the balcony.

If you are in Israel, it's a reasonable thing to expect singing on Seder night. Especially if the family has 10 kids, grandmas and grandpas, aunts and uncles, and 4 cups of wine have been drunk.

Most seders end between 12 and 1am. That is totally normal if you are doing all of the zemirot, hallel, etc. We only have one seder here, so we like to make it special.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:35 am
naturalmom5 wrote:
If they were singing so loud that the upstairs heard it and were further turned off to Yiddishkeit, imvho the Seder family were in the wrong...


You should know by now that people don't need an excuse to hate Judaism. If you're inclined that way, then any little thing will set you off.

They were already upset that "those crazy Charedi people were taking over the building". IMHO, they were just happy to have an excuse to call the police. They are like elderly people who complain when a young family moves in with little kids. The complaints will be endless.

My friend moved out shortly after that, and found a more religious community.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:37 am
Who cares that its purim. Even here in my all religious tishuv there was no blaring music so late.
OP, we dont know where you live, but if you live among non jews or not religious jews, or anyone who wanted to get to bed, you can bet you werent the only one who wanted the neighbor to turn off the music.
Why not find out what your state law is or county or town law is about noise at night?
I would have called the police right after the music should have been turned off.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:40 am
I live in a building with different kinds of people and for the most part everyone is respectful.

I would personally never dream about complaining about occasional noise I hear whether it is because of a holiday they celebrate annually or an occasional boisterous party. That is the the normal give and take of living among people.

Purim is once a year - people don't complain about loud New Year's Eve parties for the same reason or any infrequent or annual loud celebration.

Complaining - in my opinion - uses up the goodwill that people should have with their neighbors because it's not reasonable to expect people not to party loudly on certain occasions.
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:41 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Sorry, you can't ask people to turn down the music on PURIM at 9:00! Purim is once a year, they're allowed to party. It's not their problem your baby is ill. 9PM isn't midnight.
We had the same last night, my house was shaking the party was going on way past midnight. But even if we were very annoyed, I said I'm not saying a thing, Purim is once a year, I don't want to be the bad neighbor.


Last night in most cities in the States, Purim was long over by 9:00. There is no mitzvah to party like these people did. And yet to do it in the name of Purim? A house should not be shaking way past midnight. Especially when Purim is over. All that is at that point is drunken bad behavior.

The idea of Purim is not to stam party. There is a reason for this. It's not to let loose, make a bash, let down your hair. There is literally a kavana that is behind this all. When people lose their heads and do this to their neighbors, it is the opposite of a mitzvah.
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amother
Bisque


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:44 am
watergirl wrote:
Last night in most cities in the States, Purim was long over by 9:00. There is no mitzvah to party like these people did. And yet to do it in the name of Purim? A house should not be shaking way past midnight. Especially when Purim is over. All that is at that point is drunken bad behavior.

The idea of Purim is not to stam party. There is a reason for this. It's not to let loose, make a bash, let down your hair. There is literally a kavana that is behind this all. When people lose their heads and do this to their neighbors, it is the opposite of a mitzvah.


Purim was definitely NOT over by 9:00 in Brooklyn or Monsey, no way!
It's silly to get so hysterical over 1 Purim night, come on!
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:54 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Purim was definitely NOT over by 9:00 in Brooklyn or Monsey, no way!
It's silly to get so hysterical over 1 Purim night, come on!

Do Monsey and Brooklyn have a different sundown time than the rest of the country? Where I live, sundown was way before 9. Shabbos was out last week where I live at 7:00. I live in the States. So weird that Monsey and Brooklyn have a different sun and moon than me.
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Fabulous




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:56 am
I think In a primarily Jewish neighborhood (who should understand), midnight is fine for the first night (Monday) and 10ish for when purim is technically over (Tuesday night)
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:56 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Purim was definitely NOT over by 9:00 in Brooklyn or Monsey, no way!
It's silly to get so hysterical over 1 Purim night, come on!
amother, purim is LITERALLY over when night fall hits and it is no longer purim and a new day starts. Tha is what she means.
And unless y'all live in frum enclaves, it is extremely rude to blast music late on a weekday where others will not know why and will onky see "those jews" being loud.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 8:57 am
Fabulous wrote:
I think In a primarily Jewish neighborhood (who should understand), midnight is fine for the first night (Monday) and 10ish for when purim is technically over (Tuesday night)
but if there are other types of people who are living there, its outright rude.
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amother
Bisque


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:02 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
amother, purim is LITERALLY over when night fall hits and it is no longer purim and a new day starts. Tha is what she means.
And unless y'all live in frum enclaves, it is extremely rude to blast music late on a weekday where others will not know why and will onky see "those jews" being loud.


Technically Purim is over at sundown, yes. But the parties and celebrations are far from over.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:04 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Technically Purim is over at sundown, yes. But the parties and celebrations are far from over.
but they MUST think about others.
Why in my fully frum yishuv, parties were finished by 10 and we had no blaring obnoxious music so late?
Frum people can and should be able to remember that there are people out there that the loud music might bother after a certain hour. Thats very fair.
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:05 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
I live in a building with different kinds of people and for the most part everyone is respectful.

I would personally never dream about complaining about occasional noise I hear whether it is because of a holiday they celebrate annually or an occasional boisterous party. That is the the normal give and take of living among people.

Purim is once a year - people don't complain about loud New Year's Eve parties for the same reason or any infrequent or annual loud celebration.

Complaining - in my opinion - uses up the goodwill that people should have with their neighbors because it's not reasonable to expect people not to party loudly on certain occasions.


Blaring music after midnight is rude, whether it's purim or new year's.

I dont know what the law is in your parts, but where I live, music is allowed till 11. Giving them till midnight is already being extra nice.

After 11, and definitely after midnight, one can continue the party with soft quiet music. Nothing blaring. People can schmooze quietly.

Incredibly rude and selfish to blare music in a residential neighbourhood after midnight. You want to party so late and so wild and so loud, rent a place some where in the country or the woods, far away from neighbours.
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:07 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Technically Purim is over at sundown, yes. But the parties and celebrations are far from over.

So call it what it is. The party is no longer celebrating Purim. It is drunken wildness that is for the fun, not for the mitzvah. The mitzvah of drinking no longer applies (which in and of itself is questionable if it's actually a mitzvah at all) and even if you are doing so DURING Purim and it is causing distress to others, I wonder if it's actually a mitzva sh'b aveira. So let's apply this to past Purim. This kind of partying is not for any reason other than pleasure. Doing so at the expense of others so late into the night is gaiivadig.
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:09 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Technically Purim is over at sundown, yes. But the parties and celebrations are far from over.


At that point it's not for any mitzva or any chag, it's pure partying just to party. Like any drunken, loud, obnoxious party late at night.
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amother
Bisque


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:10 am
watergirl wrote:
So call it what it is. The party is no longer celebrating Purim. It is drunken wildness that is for the fun, not for the mitzvah. The mitzvah of drinking no longer applies (which in and of itself is questionable if it's actually a mitzvah at all) and even if you are doing so DURING Purim and it is causing distress to others, I wonder if it's actually a mitzva sh'b aveira. So let's apply this to past Purim. This kind of partying is not for any reason other than pleasure. Doing so at the expense of others so late into the night is gaiivadig.


Oh for God's sake! Purim is once a year!
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:13 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Oh for God's sake! Purim is once a year!

Aaaaaaand back at the beginning again. Purim is over and the parties continue. (ETA) - so if you are clinging to the excuse that Purim is once a year, the excuse doesn't work once the day ends. There is no reason to continue to be loud and cause other people distress. Not on Purim and not on any other random day. And certainly not in the name of Purim.


Last edited by watergirl on Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:22 am; edited 2 times in total
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:14 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
Oh for God's sake! Purim is once a year!


It seems this occured AFTER purim.
There is no excuse to ruin people's night, keeping babies awake and robbing everyone else of much needed rest, when the holiday is over anyway!!!

I would have called the police for sure.
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Chayalle




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:26 am
amother [ Pearl ] wrote:
Sorry. Purim is once a year but that is no excuse to blare music at 3a.m.

During the year in Israel you are allowed to make noise till 11 pm. I would give them till midnight, since it's purim, then I would call the police.

You can party without blaring music to the whole neighbourhood, especially after midnight. At that point it's plain egotism.


Oh, I don't think there's an excuse to blare music at 3 a.m. I would never do that, and I think it's obnoxious.

But at the same time, I have an issue with those who post to call the police. I would not jump to call the police on a neighbor for a once-a-year event, even if it's thoughtless and rude.

I used to live near a certain family where the man of the house is like some sort of Rebbe, he has a following, and a couple of times a year at various Yomim Tovim he used to have Bachurim over (I'm sure he still does, I just don't live there anymore) and they'd sing, with music, till very late. It was incredibly inconvenient for our family.

But I would not call the police on a neighbor just for my inconvenience. May Hashem take that as a Kapparah and protect me from worse inconveniences.
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amother
Seashell


 

Post Wed, Mar 11 2020, 9:27 am
I do agree it shouldn't be so late (to me after 12) but many people's meal/party takes a long time. We were 45 ppl in my house and went on until 11 pm. Started at 5:30.
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