Mental breakdown/panic attack

amother

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 10:26 am

I haven't done one thing for pesach. Not one. I've been busy with my kids and working whenever I have a second. It's hitting me how much I have to clean and do and kasher and buy and I'm gonna lose it. I have no idea how I can survive without ending up in a mental hospital. I told my kids I can't watch them and they can only come to me for emergencies so I can get stuff done but I'm freaking out majorly. I'm a single mom and have to do everything myself. Please help calm me down.

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 10:27 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Hugs, hugs, hugs. PLEASE call a competent Rav ASAP.

amother

Slategray

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 10:45 am

People hype up pesach prep tremendously. There's enough time next week to make a few things. You can even decide to just cook on yom Tov before the meal.
An hour before you put the chicken in the oven..

Cleaning also doesn't need to be overdone. Just give the place a vacuum clean.

mommy3b2c

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 10:47 am

Are you in Brooklyn? Maybe I can help with shopping. Also, if you would hire someone to help you, I have someone that would most likely be willing and I can pay for a few hours of help for you. To turn over the kitchen or whatever.

FranticFrummie

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 10:48 am

Big hugs!

Do you have a local Jewish Family Services? They might have food delivery volunteers. There are places where you can order food, pay with your CC, and volunteers will pick up your order and deliver it to you. If you are OOT, see if Social Services has any programs like that.

How old is your oldest? Can you put them in charge long enough for you to run to the store? I'm sure it's impossible to get a babysitter.

Clean from the top, down. Start with cabinets, then counter tops, and fridge. Dump all the crumbs on the floor. Sweep well, and then mop with soap (to nullify any crumbs you miss.)

Cover all the counters with foil, or whatever you use. Hint - if you spray down your counters with kitchen cleaner before you cover them, they won't be smelly when you pull up the covers at the end of the week. It will keep down any moisture or mold that could get under there. It also makes the covers stay in place a lot better.

Shove all your chametz in the cabinets, and tape them shut. Don't even think about cleaning them. Use your counters for storing dishes and food. If you have really tiny counter space, then clean out ONE cabinet. Don't go crazy.

Sell your chametz online at Chabad.

Feed your kids peanut butter on rice crackers, tuna on rice crackers, cream cheese on rice crackers, or whatever else you can get them to eat. Baked potatoes are usually popular, too.

fortunate123

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 11:21 am

Do one - and only ONE thing to get ready for Pesach. Tell yourself you will not think about ANYTHING else that has to get done until you do this one thing. It can be one drawer. One shelf. It doesn’t matter how small as long as you do one thing. Your brain chemistry will actually change after doing it. After you feel the difference in your headspace, and only after this critical step, you will start to look at the bigger picture, make lists and feel the ball rolling.

sneakermom

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 11:36 am

The main thing is the stove and the fridge.

I clean my fridge with fantastic with bleach. It does most of the work.

If you don’t have a self clean oven forget the oven. If you do then Chabad holds you can just burn it out on self clean and it’s good to go.

I place all my burners and grates in the oven as well on self clean.

After those two things are done just take your fantastic with bleach and wash down counters, sinks and outside of cabinets.

Wipe down kitchen chairs and tables

Then sweep and mop

Close all cabinets. Or wipe down a few.
You can place items on your counter or get some metal shelve thing to hold your stuff.

And your done.

As I work I throw things out that are just odds and ends or leftovers. It’s part of my purging process. And makes things easier.

The rest of your home just vacuum or sweep.

Tell your kids not put toys on the table and that’s it.

Good luck! You will be fine.

amother

Rose

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 11:38 am

I have done pesach in 2-3 days many times.
All you need to do is.
Empty all real chametz from cabinets and eat up/dump/sell together.
Empty/wipe out a cabinet or two for pesach stuff.
Put tape across all the closets or shelves you dont want to look through.
Sweep vacuum well around the house(clean chairs and couch.
Cooking can be done in 1 or 2 days or if u have a oven gas range you can keep on you can cook pesach.
Make a plan of action it will help ur mind for now
Example motze shabbos sunday Monday clean. Monday evening shop. Tuesday Wednsday cook.
Oh and your kids...make them wash the walls to earn thier lunch;( or just sit them in front of a screen.

Learning

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 11:51 am

This year I heard you can keep chometz gamur in case we will need it c’v if emergency situation. Tape close all kitchen cabinets and closets that you don’t need for pesach and sell it. Clean fridg and oven. The rest go over and look for chometz ( bedikas chometz). Take care of your children. Make sure they and you eat right and be healthy!you need to boost your immune system. Eat simple and healthy. Protein and simple starch and produce.

tichellady

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 12:07 pm

Please speak to a rabbi or if you aren’t comfortable I will send you the most lenient guide I have seen and you can use it . You need to do the most lenient kashering etc this year. It will still take some time but you can do it! Is getting some takeout food an option? Maybe your community Rav can help with the expense or imamother can. I’m gonna get takeout for the seders so I can kasher stuff last minute and then will cook lunches on yomtov

amother

Chocolate

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 12:12 pm

My heart goes out to you OP! It is so hard!

Prioritize as much as possible. Reach out to your rav for help.

I found this article encouraging.

https://cross-currents.com/202.....metz/

I hope it works out smoothly for you. Chag Kasher v'sameach!

amother

Aubergine

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 12:26 pm

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

How high can we leave the oven on for that long?

seeker

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 3:40 pm

Hugs!

You can take all your chometz and all your chometz equipment/utensils/etc, stuff them into a closet or cabinet, close it up, and sell it through your rabbi.

Put your kids to work, they will feel like it's fun. I emptied the fridge and my kids wiped it down with windex (I dilute it because I don't want them breathing in too much junk.) I had them check under their bed and in the toys... If you have toddlers then good luck, I don't know what to tell you, I'd probably just burn down the house in frustration. But by 4ish they should enjoy some level of participation. Even if it's not technically helpful it will bring down the stress for them.

Fortunate123 has great advice, do any tiny thing it will already feel much better than "I can't even start to think about starting."

Any way you can cut down on your work? It's really crazy times. I think most employers are trying to be understanding. Maybe you can try to make it up after Pesach.

amother

Navy

Fri, Apr 03 2020, 3:50 pm

Hugs that's so hard first take a deep breath you can do this. Then talk to your Rav or look up the easy ways they are saying to make Yom tov this year. no spring cleaning now. How old are your kids can they help can you ?make it fun put on music sing and clean all together give rewards see each kids strong point. I have some who are scrubbers some who like to organize some are more into helping with the cooking. maybe one is best at making a "camp" to keep any little ones buzy. This year is so hard but we can make it through!