How has corona affected davening in your family (DH/DS)?

amother

Sun, Apr 19 2020, 12:27 pm

Hopefully by now all of the shuls that are families normally attend are - temporarily! - closed. I'm wondering how that's affected the davening of your DH's and DS's. I realize that some DH's are taking part in porch/backyard minyanim with fixed times, but that's likely a minority.

For the rest, I assume it's extremely challenging, as for men, shul is a major part of their daily fixed schedules. In our house, DH and DS's have been davening at home b'yechidus. They normally daven in DH's study, which we're fortunate to have, and I and DD's try to be quiet and not disturb them, but it can be challenging because it's near the kitchen, where I'm used to being free to talk on the phone whenever I want.

One thing I've noticed is that they definitely wake up and daven later in the mornings than when they went to shul, both on Yom Tov and Shabbos, Chol Hamoed, and even now that we're back to weekday davening. On the other hand, they do seem to be in there for a while and appear to be taking it seriously and not just rushing through it. The chinuch ramifications are important to me, and DS's seem happy with how it's been unfolding and DH makes sure to include them, so that's good.

Yes, I realize this is the men's domain, but now that my house has suddenly become the shul and will likely stay that way for some time, I'm just curious to hear other's experiences, and any suggestions you may have for how to make it as successful as possible.

amother

Coffee

Tue, Apr 21 2020, 6:42 pm

Not sure why it matters what time davening takes place, as long as they're within zman krias shema. I'm actually happy to have the opportunity to listen to davening, especially on yom tov. I think it's nice for my kids as well. My dh davens out loud and he does a beautiful davening.

amother

Olive

Tue, Apr 21 2020, 6:44 pm

My davening from a siddur is gone, but I daven informally regularly. My dd's are not really davening either, withour the structure of school davening. Actually, they are doing mincha, because that is built into the school day, but waking up just on time to get on their calls.

I wanted to have a davening area, but it turns out that by ds's feel that if they're not in shul or school, they want to be alone. They have each found a space in the house that works for the time they like to daven- for one, it's earlier than normal, and the other is later. Meanwhile, dh does his own thing. We often disagree on the extent to which we should remind one ds when a tefillah seems to be forgotten, either accidentally or conveniently. The other is positively bereft without shul and his beis medrash- it's a real problem.

amother

Emerald

Tue, Apr 21 2020, 7:14 pm

Dh had a lot of pressure to make minyanim so its actually more relaxed now that he can daven on his own schedule. That being said - sometimes it annoys me how late he wakes because he has that option now. Also I didnt realize what kind of "davener" he was till now but it seriously irks me. That loud groaning tons of shukeling. Ugh

amother

Gray

Tue, Apr 21 2020, 7:51 pm

It's beautiful. Dh and ds pretend they're in shul so they sing all the niggunim together with all the interludes.
We live in an area with houses spaced apart significantly. Every family is on their back porch on weekdays at minyan time and dh can finally say kadish for his mother. He has to scream to be heard but so what.

ShishKabob

Tue, Apr 21 2020, 8:01 pm

amother [ Emerald ] wrote:

He is davening to the One Above, with his own self expression. Hopefully one day you will see it in a positive light.
B'Hatzlocha

amother

Emerald

Tue, Apr 21 2020, 10:46 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

He is davening to the One Above, with his own self expression. Hopefully one day you will see it in a positive light.
B'Hatzlocha

You're right. But ive stood next to women like him on RH and YK and it ruined the davening for me...