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If you gave a name you didnt like...
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amother
Violet


 

Post Sun, May 03 2020, 10:19 pm
I gave a name after a rasha (my dh's deceased father) which I would not have chosen. I spoke to a Rav, who said it was not a problem to name after a rasha. We added a second name after my grandfather. I feel fine about it, although I would not call him only by the rasha's name - I use both names, or just the second name. So, I don't feel great about it, lol. But honestly, my DH was so amazing during pregnancy and let me do EVERYTHING my way - I wanted to give him this, to have his son take his father's name.
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amother
Pumpkin


 

Post Sun, May 03 2020, 10:41 pm
I felt subtle pressure from family to name after a certain relative. My husband and I chose to name after a different relative. I stressed out about it my whole pregnancy, but it ended up okay. If people were hurt, they at least didn't say so. With another kid, I didn't love the name ahead of time but I was at least neutral to it. It's one of my favorite names now, of course, but it did take me some extra time in the beginning to get used to it.
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amother
Ginger


 

Post Sun, May 03 2020, 11:27 pm
I don't mind my baby's name but I regret not adding a name. We had a particular one in mind but my dh decided against it. I keep thinking how well the additional name would have fit.
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amother
Magenta


 

Post Sun, May 03 2020, 11:40 pm
Oh boy, names.
1. Named after someone on dh side I never had a good relationship with/ didn't like for many reasons. I like the name itself, it's from tanach and I had in mind that we're naming after the original, not the relative. And we use a nickname that person did not use.
2. Named after someone on my side whom I was very close with. Translated a name from Yiddish, and I don't really like the Hebrew version either but I wanted to make after this person.
3. Nice name, named after someone on dh side whom I have mostly positive feelings for.
4. Was supposed to choose a name from my side. Dh and I could not agree on a name. I was having a very very challenging pregnancy and was depressed. I let him choose a random name that he liked, not named after anyone, because I didn't have the emotional energy to have any more conversations about it. I love my child to pieces, the name is pretty nice too.

Not exactly what I dreamed about when I imagined naming my kids, but that's life.
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amother
Rose


 

Post Mon, May 04 2020, 2:15 am
I named after my grandmother who I looooooooooved. My mom, whom I'm super close with, was soooooo happy. But I don't like the name. It's a yiddish name, not ugly but not common so it's "weird". But I'm still happy I used it, and I"m pretty sure the name will grow on me (she's a baby still).

What I don't get is why people make fun of names.

Non-jews have so many unique names and seem to be okay with weird Jewish names so much more than we are in our own communities. That's crazy and sad.

I would never make fun of a Jewish/Yiddish name. I may not like it, but I wouldn't make fun of it.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 04 2020, 10:08 am
Parents should not use a name they dislike. If possible to use a translation or variant form or synonym, good. If possible to use as a middle name, also ok. If you're just not in love with the name but can take it or leave it, you may (or may not) eventually get used to it. if you really hate the name, please, please, please don't give it to your innocent baby. Naming children for deceased relatives is a strong custom but not a mitzvat asseh.
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Mon, May 04 2020, 10:18 am
I wouldn't dream of asking, much less pressuring, my children to name a child after anyone. It's their baby, and they have the right to name if as they see fit, just as I had the right to name my children as I saw fit. They seem to be mostly giving a first name they like or that they find connected to the parsha and a middle name after a relative, but not always. Sometimes they give a first name after someone, sometimes they give a variant or related name, sometimes they don't name after anyone at all. I felt a twinge of disappointment when my latest gc weren't named after anyone, but there's no blame. If they do name for someone from my family, I consider it a gift, not the discharge of an obligation. I would never, ever ask.
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