Do very unattractive people know they’re very unattractive?

Kiwi13

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 12:12 am

Lots of beautiful people think they're ugly, which has a lot to do with what society deems beautiful and includes in marketing, movies, etc.. Maybe if more people of differing looks post their pictures proudly, it'll encourage other people to feel good about themselves too. The way people carry themselves contributes to their level of attraction also - a confident, friendly person is much more attractive than someone with the same looks who hunches over shyly or who is standoffish or arrogant.

Cheiny

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 12:13 am

happyone wrote:

at least she has a healthy self esteem!

I totally disagree and so will everyone else with any type of degree or knowledge in the area of social work/psychology. People with healthy self esteem don’t feel a need to splash themselves all over social media or in public, or try to convince others they think they’re great. I’d bet the person has very low self esteem.

BatyaEsther

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 12:26 am

Check out today's quote of the day from the Aish website!

If anyone can post it, that would be awesome. On my phone I can't seem to convert and post the image.
Thanks

Einikel

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 12:42 am

BatyaEsther wrote:

Check out today's quote of the day from the Aish website!

If anyone can post it, that would be awesome. On my phone I can't seem to convert and post the image.
Thanks

yksraya

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 12:52 am

Cheiny wrote:

It's not as black and white. Sometimes that's indeed the case, but sometimes it's just the opposite. Some ppl are just confident enough and are the type to just share their lives.

OP mentioned it's on someones facebook account. It's her own personal account. Maybe she has a closed account for only her followers etc. You can never know.

I know some very wonderful, confident ppl, with good self esteem, that just like to keep their friends in the loop and like to use social media and post about their lives.

On the other hand, I do know some ppl who have low self esteem and like to draw attention by posting pics or stuff in a silly way.

amother

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 1:22 am

yksraya wrote:

Not it’s not only on her personal fb acct it’s for everyone to see in a lots of different places like she’s searching for attention, and it’s not only to post about her life she keeps putting up pics of herself , closeups, and yes she’s very very homely

amother

Beige

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 1:24 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Honestly, you seem jealous of her confidence.

amother

Silver

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 1:27 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

most people who post a lot on social media about themselves are searching for attention.

amother

Chocolate

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 1:32 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I don’t mean to be mean but there’s a woman I know of who goes on Facebook and keeps putting up selfies of herself and she really is very very homely and I’m just thinking, doesn’t she see what other people see? This isn’t a case of everybody having different taste, this is someone who’s really scary ugly. But she puts up pics look I dyed my own hair look this is me with my new baseball cap on. So do ugly people really not know they’re ugly?

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

I understand the question, but between the lines you just sound mean. They way you reiterated so many times about her lack of beauty

Who cares. Live and let live
I’m too busy to spend my time overthinking peoplenposts.
If you are personally turned off by her photos, just unfollow. You can unfollow without unfriending her and she won’t be notified about this change.

etky

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 1:48 am

yksraya wrote:

Maybe she doesn't have "good looks" but I would not consider gods creations "ugly". She can be beautiful on the inside.

What I call "ugly" is people with no good middos.

Looks are so relative. While one finds her not so pretty, someone else might actually think of her as pretty. I'm glad she is proudly posting pics of herself.

Reminds me of the famous stoy in the Gemara in Ta'anit about R. Shimon ben Elazar and his encounter with the ugly man.
Bottom line is that while there are people who are objectively ugly by society's criteria - and the gemara does not balk about using the term or its antithesis, beauty (R. Yishma'el for example) - we are all creations of Hashem and should be treated as such with respect.

Iymnok

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 2:17 am

I dint find most celebrities to be so pretty. Most of my neighbors are. Likely it’s because I know them and know how they are as people that they become more beautiful in my eyes.

crust

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 2:19 am

Iymnok wrote:

I dint find most celebrities to be so pretty. Most of my neighbors are. Likely it’s because I know them and know how they are as people that they become more beautiful in my eyes.

This!
If you saw any celebrity now during Covid talking from their home office without their proffesional makeup and without the perfect lighting they all look way different.

Success10

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 2:28 am

Uch, stop all the fluffy, new age, feel good talk. Some people are, in fact, UGLY. Hashem's creations are varied, and there's nothing wrong with admitting the reality.

farm

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 2:29 am

OP, do you think pretty peoples know they are pretty? What about beautiful people? Or drop dead gorgeous people? Do they know that’s how the world sees them?

amother

Cerise

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 2:33 am

To answer your question,
Yes I know I’m ugly, but my mom always told me how pretty I am.
So I’m a bit confused.
We were once out for a walk and she said” you know your the prettiest child in our family”

Mom, thank you, you have no idea what those words meant to me all those years.
Till today I can’t decide if she was lying or not.
Moms out there, say it to your kids, they need to hear it very clear.

heidi

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 2:44 am

I know I'm fat.
That makes me ugly.
I still have the right to walk around wherever I want, even if I offend OP's sensibilities.
I would guess OP's homely poster knows she's ugly and chooses to post pictures for reasons you don't need to understand.
While I choose to avoid the public eye, it's entirely within ugly poster's rights to post whatever pictures of herself she wishes.
And it's entirely within OP's rights not to look.

Kiwi13

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 3:24 am

OP are you concerned for HER? Do you think she’s unaware of negative attention she’s getting online? Are you embarrassed for HER?

I’m not clear on why you’re posting this thread. Trying to understand. I get the sense that our responses aren’t answering what you’re really asking.

Ora in town

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 5:27 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Why would you ask such a question?
It's mean and betrays a mean spirit.
The fact that the question was asked anonymously could indicate that at least there is some sense of shame for being so mean... On the other hand, it is so easy to bash and be mean under the cover of anonymity... So I don't really know what I should do with that...

Last edited by Ora in town on Sun, Jun 07 2020, 5:54 am; edited 2 times in total

amother

White

Sun, Jun 07 2020, 5:35 am

I saw this post as I was scrolling the main page and I was in a dilemma, do I open this and read it or continue scrolling. I failed. I'm here. OP, I don't know you and all I can say is poor you. The sentence "I'm sorry but " totally cancels your post.
You my friend are as ugly as they come. You my friend are the one with the low self esteem who needs to put down people in order to raise yourself up. You my friend probably doesn't even know what you're missing in your life with your ugly attitude. It's because of people like you that make the world an ugly place.
I'm very proud of that beautiful person you feel the need to put down. You definitely have the option of unfollowing her and go on with your petty life.
Yes you hit a raw nerve. I don't like people with your attitude.