Help me speak eloqently

amother

Sun, Jun 14 2020, 10:36 pm

I need help with my "speaking"- I don't speak eloquently at all, and it's really starting to bother me.

When I am passionate about something, and I start to rant, the words flow freely. But when it comes to simple thoughts and sentences, the words just don't always come out in a nice flowing way. I'll often stop in the middle of a sentece, and rephrase it so try and make it more clear.

To answer some basic questions:
- english is my first language (and the language I am referring to above!)
- I had an excellent secular education
- I have no learning disabilities bH
- I'm not referring to stuttering.. to most people I prob sound totally fine and normal (I do mainly speak clearly, but there's too many times I find myself not speaking clearly)

I came to realize how bad it is when I was sent a video clip of me at work, speaking to a client (I new I was being filmed, it was for a purpose). I am an interior designer. I am not expected to be Mrs. Public Speaker, but I do need to give over my thoughts in a proper way so my clients understands my thoughts properly.

how can I fix myself?!!

forgetit

Mon, Jun 15 2020, 12:41 am

I'm not sure if you want to go for it, but there are public speaking coaches who can help you with this.
You may also want to listen to recordings of your work conversations and then practice a convo redo.
Practice imaginary work-related conversations, record them, and then listen to them and try to improve.
If you google a bit, you should be able to find self help books on the topic as well.

daagahminayin

Mon, Jun 15 2020, 12:55 am

1) Read high quality literature to improve your vocabulary and sentence structures.

Is the problem that you feel you don’t have enough time to think of the right words? If that’s the case:

2) Before you start speaking, think about what you want to say and where you want to end up. It’s ok to pause before answering a question to gather your thoughts, or to speak slower in general when you’re trying to articulate a complex idea so your thoughts can catch up with your speech.

3) Use filler phrases in your speech while you think of what you want to say, such as “how can I put this”, “let me think of the best way to say this”, “To answer your question...”, “That’s an interesting point...”

Also, don’t be too hard on yourself! As long as you’re not giving a presentation, you don’t need to have flawless speech. It’s ok if it takes you a while to articulate things, especially if it’s clear from what you do end up saying that you know what you’re talking about and you’re skilled and competent.

Rappel

Mon, Jun 15 2020, 1:47 am

Practice speaking. Practice in front of a mirror. Practice in front of your dog. Just talk. Read plays. You'll feel more confident with practice.

There is also an art to body language and speech patterns which can make you seem more effective and confident and dominant. My favourite book on the subject is called "You Say More Than You Think." Check it out. It's easy reading, and full of effective tips.

Ora in town

Mon, Jun 15 2020, 2:24 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I think it's a matter of exercise.

In a professional setting, when you want to present an idea to a client, you work out a salespitch and practice it...

In general, there are courses or clubs like "toastmasters" to practice public speaking.

Perhaps your problem could also be solved by writing down your arguments and structuring them before you start to speak...