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All the pool talk is terrifying me



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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:06 pm
With many camps and shared pools possibly/probably not opening, I am seeing a LOT of people talking about buying aboveground pools. It's all over facebook, maybe here too (I blocked the coronavirus forum.)

I'm always a nervous sort about these things but in this case I'm especially terrified. I think most people who have pools in/near their homes did their homework before installing them with appropriate covers, fencing, alarms, etc. I'm not at all optimistic that the many many many people hopping on the "oh let's buy a backyard pool" bandwagon are doing that as well. Can these aboveground pools be covered securely enough? Do they have fences that will prevent the neighbors' kids from getting in? Are they planning to supervise their kids in the pool constantly, when it seems like until now they've only been talking about wanting to keep their kids occupied and going crazy from having to watch them all the time (I am too, trust me. Just without a pool.) Do they have rock solid first aid skills? Kids who are able to stick to boundaries such as "you can play outside but don't you dare set foot near the pool"?

My heart is clenching up from the fear that we are going to see an uptick in drowning incidents this summer. I pray to God that won't happen but I'm terrified.

Please, if you're getting or considering getting a pool, please please please do ALL the things to make it as safe as possible. Get a motion sensor alarm. Learn CPR. Keep a hand on your kids. Make sure your neighbors are OK with the pool or get an airtight fence.
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Stars




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:12 pm
Pools connected to a home or bodies of water nearby really really scare me too. I know of a child who drowned in a lake near his home. He was gone for less than 5 minutes. It completely shattered the family forever.

Pictures of children in pools terrify the heck out of me. Why are people on their phones while watching children in the water?

I don't understand why families with young children actively look for homes/vacation homes with pools.

So yeah, I'm with you.
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RuralIma




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:17 pm
I've worked as a paramedic and a 911 dispatcher and kids and pools will forever haunt me. Pools are completely terrifying and people seem too unaware of the very serious and real risks. Even if your child takes lessons there's still a risk. Even if you think your kid isn't running around the pool even though you told them not to 50 billion times unless you're right there you don't know that they're not. In addition to knowing CPR, pool safety needs to be emphasized as well, especially for younger kids.
What do you do if a toy falls in the pool?
What do you do if a friend falls in the pool?
What do you do if you fall in the pool?

Pools can either be a fun family activity or a family tragedy and it doesn't take very long for it to go from one to the other.
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agreer




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:23 pm
Excellent points. Thank you.
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amother
Powderblue


 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2020, 5:52 pm
My family always takes a week vacation to a house with a pool. All the doors are alarmed and ring when opened so we can track where the kids are. We are a family of lifeguards so we take pool safety very seriously. (my dad actually made me 'pretend' save him the first year we went because he wasn't comfortable swimming in the pool if there wasn't someone around to pull him out)

Almost every single year (going on 10+ years) one of my siblings starts floundering in water over their heads. As in choking on water and actively drowning.

ALL the little kids have to wear life vest near the pool, but sometimes they forget and jump in without it. Or an older kid flips over their tube and gets startled.

We have a ton a stories of how someone 'saved' them. My dad jumped in one year in his clothes. So yes, a pool is very dangerous and no, I don't think I would ever live in a house that had one on grounds. The constant state of high alert is exhausting.
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silverlining3




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 10 2020, 10:00 pm
As much as I love the pool, Iyh when I'm into buying a house, with a pool is a big no-no
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amother
Amethyst


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 1:58 am
Water is NOT your friend.
As a life guard and a very high level swimmer I used to feel very confident around water.
Then we went camping and within the first 10 minutes next to the creek my daughter fell in under the watch of my DH.
Thank hashem 10000000 times that she got stuck on a tree stump and another 1000000 that I run and swim fast.
Both of us were badly bruised and traumatized but BH tell the story with a smile.
What would have happened had the tree not stopped her from floating downstream or if I did not know how to swim against a current???
Whenever my mind goes there I literally get chest pains.
BE MORE THAN CAREFUL around water.
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amother
Navy


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:21 am
I had a pool growing up (above ground pool) and we have a pool now. Our children are older and BH we’ve never had any problems. I do think we were more careful than we would’ve been without a pool.
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amother
White


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 9:07 am
Honestly, I think a lot of people on the sites are very -------(trying to find a nice word which means it combination of naïve, ignorance, and just plain stupid). I'm not sure if they just haven't been exposed to things and don't understand danger, have emunah that Hashem will protect, or just have a families where a child or two is dispensable.
It's not just about pools, I have seen it over and over in regard to health and safety issues.
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shanie5




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:24 pm
We have a big and long (enough) backyard. Dd, with the help of her older brother made a slip n slide using a heavy piece of plastic and a garden hose. Its wet, cool, fun. And safer than a pool.
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 2:33 pm
amother [ White ] wrote:
Honestly, I think a lot of people on the sites are very -------(trying to find a nice word which means it combination of naïve, ignorance, and just plain stupid). I'm not sure if they just haven't been exposed to things and don't understand danger, have emunah that Hashem will protect, or just have a families where a child or two is dispensable.
It's not just about pools, I have seen it over and over in regard to health and safety issues.


It's not just this site. Water activities have an appeal to the general population.

But yes, I get you. People on my block let 2, 3 and 4 year olds play on the street by themselves. In my opinion kids need constant supervision at least until age 8.
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:07 pm
I have had an above ground pool for the past 8 years the first 6 we had a 30 in and we upgraded to a 42 in last year I have a nice size yard that we can still play in without being by the pool. I have rules I layed them out they get followed yes I need to sit outside when they are outside swimming it's a pain but important.I have let friends swim with us and play in my yard most listen very well and respect. But there have been kids they scare me they ligit don't listen even when I say we don't do that it's not safe. Those kids really scare me by now we had it up enough that my kids know how to act. I worked in camps before I have pulled kids out of the water in camp and we watched videos about pool safety and drowning. It is a huge responsibility but it's cooling and great exercise and as long as you understand you need to be outside and you have to know your kids
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amother
Linen


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 3:14 pm
silverlining3 wrote:
As much as I love the pool, Iyh when I'm into buying a house, with a pool is a big no-no


My mom is a agent.
If she sells a house with a pool to a family with little kids, she tells them to fill it.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Fri, Jun 12 2020, 9:11 am
I always wonder how any family with or without kids buys a pool with a backyard.

Inevitably there will be guests using the pool......
Inevitably they need a lot siyata dishmaya that no tragedy should occur.
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Fri, Jun 12 2020, 9:21 am
amother [ Khaki ] wrote:
I always wonder how any family with or without kids buys a pool with a backyard.

Inevitably there will be guests using the pool......
Inevitably they need a lot siyata dishmaya that no tragedy should occur.

Inevitably you need siyata dishmaya to walk anywhere, especially without a mask during an epidemic. Or pack your family of 10 in a 6 passenger vehicle and the kids aren't strapped in the back, or not vaccinating, or all the things that many seem to have no problem with. life needs siyata dishmaya. But what we also need is common sense and safety measures put in place so that doesn't happen.
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gr8Life




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 18 2020, 11:37 pm
Why is fenced pool in the backyard not safe? Of course you watch the kids when they are swimming.
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Fri, Jun 19 2020, 2:41 am
I know a child who r'l climbed the fence and drowned.

There is no such thing as being too safe
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amother
Puce


 

Post Fri, Jun 19 2020, 6:23 am
amother [ Fuchsia ] wrote:
I know a child who r'l climbed the fence and drowned.

There is no such thing as being too safe


There is such a thing as being to safe (not related to pool safety). It's called helicopter parenting and creates young adults who do not know how to function independently because parents where overprotective.

Regarding pools, they can be safe.
We grew up with a pool;
- Both parents where certified lifeguards and got re-certified yearly
- The pool always had a tall,locked, wooden, gate (as opposed to chain link which is easy to climb)
- pool had motion sensor that was so sensitive it would go of if a branch fell in (quite annoying on shabbos - good thing we had a non-jewish neighbor). My parents would always rush to the pool when it would go of even though it was always nothing.
- any child who couldn't swim HAD to where the bathing suit with the life jacket built in - most of us passed our deep water test by 5 - 6 years old.

I agree that all these overground pools are concerning - when it's just for one summer people don't usually invest in infrastructure. Shomer Pesayim Hashem.
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amother
Scarlet


 

Post Fri, Jun 19 2020, 7:07 am
There was a lady in my community who had a backyard camp for 2 year olds with a non fenced above ground pool. I can’t understand anyone who sent there. Ladies, please make sure you check out the yard and possibly neighboring yards if you are sending to backyard camps.
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amother
Teal


 

Post Fri, Jun 19 2020, 8:12 am
We got a call for the first time this year. it's above ground so you need a ladder which I am neurotic about taking out when they are not in the pool. We also spent a thousand shekels on an alarm that goes in the pool and literally someone touches it and it goes off.At night we might not hear that alarm so we have an alarm on our entire garden so if somebody were to come in the garden at all whether they went to the pool or not the alarm would go off for the whole house and it is super super loud! And yes the kids still have to be watched and I still have to be careful.but most of my kids are teenagers and my youngest is 6 and this is the first year that we decided to do it.
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