Until what age can a boy use the women's bathroom

amother

Seashell

Fri, Aug 14 2020, 7:48 am

Approximately age 9.

That is, I'd be okay seeing a 5-9 year old go in the women's bathroom with his mother, but if he were in there alone I'd feel like he was up to no good (if he's alone anyway he should have gone to the men's).

Elfrida

Fri, Aug 14 2020, 7:51 am

Take the fact that he is your son out of the picture. If you were in the ladies bathroom and another mother came in with her son, until what age would you feel comfortable with the situation? Five? Seven? Ten? Teenage?

And at what age is the boy in question old enough to feel embarrassed by the situation?

Your sensitivities will probably match other peoples. So from that age, don't do it.

amother

Mistyrose

Fri, Aug 14 2020, 7:51 am

this is a very tricky question these days

I for one am not comfortable seeing "big boys" in bathrooms however at the same time am not a fan of sending boys alone into men's bathrooms or leaving them alone outside while I use it

depends upon the situation, specific factors including the size of the child, the position of the bathrooms in the building, where I can stand, where he can stand, his personality and size, how crowded....

and tell the boy to go straight in to a stall, wash hands, and straight out

fast and do not look around

obviously bar mitzvah age would be too old.

other than that depends upon the situation and specific factors

FranticFrummie

Fri, Aug 14 2020, 8:00 am

Unless your child is developmentally delayed, I would say 5. You can stand outside the men's room and say "OK honey, Ima is right here!" That will let anyone know that you are aware of where your child is, he's not hefker, and that he's not going to be an easy victim.

You have to think though, your child is far more likely to get hit by lightning while playing at summer camp, than they are to be molested in a department store bathroom.

If your child needs physical assistance, than I would say that any age is fine, but a handicap stall would be your best bet.

This is actually an excellent argument for family/handicap/baby changing/ and TRANS bathrooms. A separate bathroom away from the public stalls gives you total privacy and control. Obviously don't dawdle in there in case a disabled person is waiting, but otherwise it's the best compromise.

For that reason alone, I think that worried moms should advocate for a "Third Use" bathroom.

Here's another question. To what age would you allow your male child watch you change clothes at home? Never? 3? 9? 13? It may not be exactly the same, but there's the same feeling of intimacy about it.

amother

Chocolate

Fri, Aug 14 2020, 9:34 am

I have a 5 yr son I would absolutely never send him into the men's bathroom alone. We all go together with my other 2 kids into a handicap stall and take turns.
Probably when he's 10 I would send him into the men's alone.