6 yo ds wets his bed often

amother

Plum

Wed, Aug 26 2020, 10:58 pm

amother [ Babyblue ] wrote:

I took my son to the bathroom at 12 am nightly for years. My other kids were dry - not him. This son never was.
We bought the wet alarm. When it went off I dragged him out of bed to the bathroom. We did that for a year. I probably spent 4 years carrying my large child to make on the toilet until it was just innapropriate to hold him over the toilet.
Trust me it has nothing to do with being passive.

first of all, I didn't make a general statement that it means you were passive. In my DH's situation I felt that MIL was too loving and not enough on top of it. She had a busy household k'ah and didn't mind. DH wasn't bothered by it at all either, even though his brother was.

Secondly, about your son. When you took him at midnight was he still dry then? IME, midnight was always too late. I had to catch it between 10 and 11.
How old was he when you did this? Once they're older, it's much harder because so many years of it are so ingrained.
The alarm never helped any of my siblings who struggled with bedwetting. The point of it though is for the kid to come out of bed, not for you to drag him or else he isn't waking up enough to feel the need to make and he's basically using the bathroom in his sleep. You want them to wake up enough to be in control of their bladder.

amother

Babyblue

Wed, Aug 26 2020, 11:02 pm

amother [ Plum ] wrote:

All my kids I night train from age 3 - no one ever needed pull-ups and stayed dry almost immediately. It only didn’t work for him.

crust

Wed, Aug 26 2020, 11:28 pm

amother [ Babyblue ] wrote:

This isn’t a save on laundry. This is a save on self esteem. He woke up soaked in urine - feeling horrible about himself. I never said a word about it to him. But it was really eating him up - and he shares a room with a few siblings - none are bed wetters and it was affecting him. And the room smelled. Even if no one said anything there was always the smell of urine. I’ve seen a big difference since we stared.

Why can't he wear a Pull-up or Good nights?

amother

Slateblue

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 7:08 am

This is not something to worry about at this point. All my DDs were dry at night by age 4 or earlier, but my sons both bed wet until becoming dry completely on their own, one at age 10 and the other at age 6. Actually they did not bed wet because I kept them wearing Goodnites until they were dry every night for 2 weeks. I found that Pull Ups were not absorbent enough and they leaked through. The GoodNites made the whole thing into a non-issue until they outgrew the problem--there was no laundry problem and no shame problem. They just had to dispose of the GoodNite discreetly in the morning.

Good luck!

amother

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 7:47 am

crust wrote:

Why can't he wear a Pull-up or Good nights?

When I mentioned the idea he looked a little hurt and said, "but I'm not a baby!"

I just ordered a polyester pad made for this, thanks to an earlier poster's suggestion. I'll have to wash just the pad, hopefully.

crust

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 8:13 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

There are disposable pads. No reason to make your life harder.

Children move during sleep. How does the pad stay in place?

Its uncomfortable for a child to get wet, much more than it is for the parents to wash the linen.

When he understands that a pullup will make it more comfortable for him he will want to wear it.

amother

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 8:18 am

crust wrote:

Re disposable: I'd rather not throw $ into the garbage.
Re pull-ups: I don't want to convince him. It's not worth it to me if it might potentially cause him embarrassment. He wakes up and changes his pants and underwear on his own if the wetness bothers him.
The pad is quite large.

amother

Jetblack

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 8:22 am

amother [ Green ] wrote:

My son was a bedwetter. Pediatricians say that it is normal but it was affecting his self esteem. We got Dr Sagee's alarm which was very helpful.

The biggest help was the pee exercises. Every time he peed during the day, he would pee for 3 seconds and stop and then pee for 3 seconds and stop, repeated until he was done peeing. It was basically kegels for boys. Once he started the exercises, he was fully dry at night within a couple of weeks. By strengthening the muscles, he was able to either hold his pee in or wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I HIGHLY recommend the exercises because it is really easy to do and very helpful.

We used dr sagee also. Not perfect but things are a lot better

crust

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 8:25 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

A pad on the bed is embarrassing as well.
The main embarrassment is the actual bedwetting, getting wet and feeling lack of control.

amother

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 8:27 am

crust wrote:

A pad on the bed is embarrassing as well.
The main embarrassment is the actual bedwetting, getting wet and feeling lack of control.

Pad on the bed is under the duvet cover so no one sees it and even if someone sees it, it doesn't look conspicuous- it looks like part of the bedding. He chose and likes that idea.

Pull-up to him is embarassing. He told me so. Im listening to him.

crust

Thu, Aug 27 2020, 8:34 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

That's good.
Hatzlacha.

amother

Ginger

Sun, Aug 30 2020, 3:02 am

amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:

We used dr sagee also. Not perfect but things are a lot better

We used Dr Sagie too, when my DS was 12-13.
It didn't work. After 6 months, Dr Sagie said we should take a break and come back in 1 month.
Once we stopped the Sagie program he started being dry. What

amother

Sapphire

Sun, Aug 30 2020, 5:12 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I told my son that it's not his fault. Right now there is something wrong with his body and we are treating it step by step. Until we are ready to deal with the nighttime, he has to war pull-ups. He is fine with it, and he is turning 7 in November. (He’s a cool kid, and he’s the youngest, so it’s not like he minds being babied a little bit longer).

bnm

Sun, Aug 30 2020, 11:54 pm

amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:

I said the same. My next kid was dry at night right away. My kid came asking what is wrong with his/her body. I reminded them they have some abnormalities that we check up on each year and their father wet the bed till a very late age and it all contributes. They wear a pullup when having a rough week or sleeping somewhere not at home. I bought reusable training pullups that look like thick underwear and use that sometimes.

amother

Lavender

Thu, Sep 03 2020, 10:37 pm

I have 3 kids that wet the bed.
For us, the alarm did not work. I used bed pads and a few different styles of pads and pull ups.
After going to specialists, we've tried limiting drinks before bedtime, we've tried exercises and we've tried incentives. Nothing worked. My kids were never made to feel bad about it.
The only thing that did work was time, (and encouragement), and , really, when the kids had a strong enough self-determination to stop. (I still have a 7 year old not quite there yet - still had daytime accidents).
In our case, it is hereditary. I was not fully dry till my 20s! My brother had meds that helped him, but not me. I had a hard time in camp and sleepovers. But my DH, who didn't have this problem, is very good with incentives for when the kids work on staying dry. (Prizes helps with one kid to keep paying attention to his bladder during the day)
As a side note, the pull ups for teens is not meant for babies - it says 14, 16, etc. There are also pads for boys, which are small(-er than pull ups) and discreet. Disposable bed pads are big and have corners that stick to the sheets so they don't move. The washable pad that I have moves cuz my kids move a lot.
Hatzlocha!!