Funny things they say

thunderstorm

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 9:40 am

The other day my DH picked up my daughter from the babysitter, put her in the car seat and got into his seat. She then began dictating her rules starting with . “Totty, tawn the wheel and drive”. Then “Tawn left . Don’t go home. Go to the Bingo store”

SuperWify

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 9:55 am

thunderstorm wrote:

This is my Little back seat driver.

“Mommy it’s green- gooo!”

“Mommy drive faster!!”

“Mommy go to gand-ma house.”

Tzutzie

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 10:03 am

thunderstorm wrote:

This morning my 2 yr old daughter handed me my mascara as I was putting on my makeup and she said “Here’s your eyelashes”.

This one made me laugh out loud!

Kiwi13

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 12:42 pm

amother [ Bronze ] wrote:

My 3-year-old: "I need to rebuild it! I need to rebuild Yerushalayim but I don't have enough magnetiles! I accidentally knocked it over last night!"

Yes, he said rebuild and accidentally.

Ahhhhh that’s precious!!!!!!!!!! 😍

Rappel

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 12:46 pm

My 2 y.o. and I were making sukkah decorations when she held up her drawing to show me:

"What is it?"
"Abba, DS, DD, and this rock - the rock of Mecca."
"Say what?"

I tried to figure out what she meant, but she insisted that "Mecca is Mecca," and would give no further explanation.

amother

Bronze

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 12:56 pm

My MIL asked if my sister heard back from med schools yet. My 3.5-year-old waves his finger and says, "Not yet! She's still applying."

He also explained to me that we have two days of Yom Tov because when there was a new moon the messengers didn't come from Yerushalayim right away. (I love the way he says Yerushalayim with a flourish in his voice.)

Someone asked why the schools are closing again. His response: "It's because the rate of corona is too high."

My sister was driving him and he said, "There's a lot of fog!" My sister misheard him and thought he said a bad word, but she just said, "I don't understand what you're saying." He responded, "You know, like when a cloud comes down on the ground! It's very foggy!"

ExtraCredit

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 12:58 pm

amother [ Bronze ] wrote:

You’ve got a little professor there!

Good Friend

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 1:21 pm

I love reading these!
Of course I can't remember all of them,but here's a sample:

My two year old daughter wanted to watch a video called "I'm a Chosid". I told her to say Shema and then she could watch the video for a few minutes. She sang out "Shema, I'm a Chosid, Hashem-, I'm a Chosid, Hashem I'm a chosid" and continued that way through the whole veahavta, replacing every other word with I'm a Chosid!
I run an after school Hebrew school, and the other day I took the kids on a field trip. I took along my 2.5 year old, and I thought she would be shy and quiet in the van with all the 5 year olds, but she right away began giving orders: Ilan- put on your buckle! Lavi- sit back! Michael we're not going until you're buckled!

And 1 more: Before Shavuos I told her it's going to be Yom tov, like remember Pesach? Now it's going to be Yom tov again! Later I found her scrubbing the floor with a wipe. "I'm cleaning for Shavuos!" (Apparently she thought we have to clean for Shavuos the same way we clean for Pesach. Boruch Hashem she got that wrong!)

Roots

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 2:46 pm

oh! these are precious!!

one night when my son and daughter were 3 and 4.5 , the 3 yr old missed the toilet before bedtime and after I put them to bed I began to wash the floor (do sponja) and I heard the kids whispering to eachother 'look immas washing the floor! how does she know how? you think abba taught her?'

my son was once playing with a glue stick and I told him dont open it alot, so he said' if I open it till the sky , the sky will be sticky'

DH said lets buy soda for shabbos, you want diet?
and my daughter overhearing it (who didnt know the word diet then) said abba- not diet, buy it!

Roots

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 2:47 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

This morning my 2 yr old daughter handed me my mascara as I was putting on my makeup and she said “Here’s your eyelashes”.

that cracked me up

amother

Gray

Thu, Oct 15 2020, 4:34 pm

Roots wrote:

My kids saw me doing sponja and asked me if the cleaning lady taught me. Mind you I have a cleaning lady once a week. I know how to do sponja buster, it just happens when you're sleeping.

Reminds me of when a kid woke up in the middle of the night asking dh where I was, I was in the shower and kid was so confused 'but it's not erev shabbos '. Umm Mr. I shower every night after you're sleeping...

amother

Chocolate

Wed, Oct 21 2020, 8:40 pm

My toddler is obsessed with fuzzy stuff. It needs to be a certain softness for it to be “yummy” and she usually gets tired of it after a few weeks and a few washes when it’s “not yummy anymore”)

She’s also obsessed with dogs and so when I saw a little fuzzy pink poodle at the dollar store I couldn’t resist to treat the spoiled little princess.

Dd was beyond thrilled and super careful “doggy” shouldn’t get dirty because “then it won’t be yummy & cozy anymore”. She also explained to me that “I like this doggy because it doesn’t lick me & doesn’t make noise”.

She was super concerned though that “doggie has no fingers for blood tests” (glucose)
She had more questions and comments on her doggie that we’re super funny & beyond her age!

Last edited by amother on Mon, Nov 23 2020, 9:37 pm; edited 1 time in total

Sage

Wed, Nov 11 2020, 9:04 pm

That is too cute!

My 24mo lovea to talk to the Google home. He says "ah Google, pay sabbos ih cohmey" translation hey Google play shabbos is coming. It melts me heart.

doodlesmom

Wed, Nov 11 2020, 9:19 pm

My sister was arguing with my then 2 year old about when to cross the street, and all frustrated she announced “ I’m not fighting with a 2 year old” and he responds” I’m not a tuna roll”

doodlesmom

Wed, Nov 11 2020, 10:34 pm

Moonlight wrote:

This morning my kids were talking abt which year they were born in. They asked me what year I was born in.
"You were born in the 1900s?!?!?"o Surprised

Now I feel old

I was explaining to my kids that 2 of them share a Yiddish but not English birthday, since the year she was born the timing was different.
They were in awe and amazed that punkt on the year each of them were born their Yiddish and English birthdays coincided!