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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Toddlers
I have only 1 child and I feel burnt out, 2nd one on the way



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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, Oct 21 2020, 11:53 pm
I have only 1 child and sometimes it gets to the point that I feel burnt out. And I am a stay at hone mom. I feel like I don’t have time to myself. I am BH pregnant with my second one and I wonder how I will manage if I am having a hard time even with 1 child. My husband helps as much as he can but he works most of the day. I feel embarrassed when I hear of all these women who have many kids and somehow they manage and even with 1 child I have a hard time. I am thankful to Hashem for my precious baby and for the fact that I am expecting another but I wonder how I will manage. Any advice?
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liveandlove.ima




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 21 2020, 11:55 pm
Get Help

Housekeeper - night nurse - order in - take a break when needed - self care
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blueberry6




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 12:36 am
They say it gets easier. I wouldn't know - I'm also expecting my second and waiting for it to get easier myself - but apparently with each kid, you get a little better at this mom thing, and it gets easier to handle. So hang in there! I guess Smile
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 12:41 am
My friends with multiple kids say it wasn’t easier with just one. I don’t exactly get it but multiple People have told me this so I assume it’s true
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amother
Taupe


 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 12:46 am
I remember around 10 years ago, when I had one child and a second on the way. My husband was telling his friend how busy we are and that we don't have time to breathe... His friend who at the time had 5 kids, said "you'll never have time, no matter how many kids you have". It's so true! Bh we have five kids now and we still don't have time to breathe. With each additional child, it is very difficult at first, but with hashem's help, things fall into place and somehow we (barely) manage. I learned to manage on less sleep, make non-gourmet meals, cut corners anywhere possible - think lots of disposables etc. My husband is hardly ever around, comes home late at night, comes hope 2 hours before shabbos...is bh off sunday's.
It's very difficult, but bh very rewarding!!
Hatzlacha and bshaa tova!!
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SuperWify




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 6:38 am
It might be easier to get a job and send your toddler out. It’s good for your social life and then your not always with your kids.
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amother
Dodgerblue


 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 7:26 am
Lower your standards
Hire help
Send toddler to a babysitting group for a few hours

It’s very hard Hug for some people it gets easier with each kid after 2 kids. So maybe you’ll be one of those people! And maybe give yourself a bigger break between #2 and #3.
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amother
Beige


 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 8:55 am
I found I always felt burnt out when I was home all day with my child/ren. I work part-time and I need the social and mental stimulation for my own wellbeing. I find getting out each day, doing an job with other adults resets me and I can then deal with the kids when they come home.
Also one child is often harder as you have to entertain and keep them busy whilst more, they play together and you don't have to always be there to play with them.
Make sure you have something other than your children in your life. Have a project or hobby or something that stimulates your mind. Make sure you're taking time for yourself. If dh is home, go out for a short walk, get some fresh air and enjoy the peace.
Hatzlacha and b'shaa tovah
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jewishmom6




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 9:43 am
amother [ Beige ] wrote:
I found I always felt burnt out when I was home all day with my child/ren. I work part-time and I need the social and mental stimulation for my own wellbeing. I find getting out each day, doing an job with other adults resets me and I can then deal with the kids when they come home.
Also one child is often harder as you have to entertain and keep them busy whilst more, they play together and you don't have to always be there to play with them.
Make sure you have something other than your children in your life. Have a project or hobby or something that stimulates your mind. Make sure you're taking time for yourself. If dh is home, go out for a short walk, get some fresh air and enjoy the peace.
Hatzlacha and b'shaa tovah


exactly this.
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amother
Slateblue


 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 2:37 pm
Had the same feeling, so I took a nice long break after my 2nd child. I work part-time and have breathing time all for myself. I’m currently pregnant again and managing Bh very very well.
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amother
Pink


 

Post Thu, Oct 22 2020, 2:43 pm
Would you be able to send your child out? I didn’t want to get a job, I just wanted space and alone time and rest. Doesn’t matter if it’s only one child or four children. It would also be easier on your toddler to get started on a playgroup now rather than when the baby comes
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