Mainstream or special ed?

amother

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 12:46 pm

My son in first grade is having a very hard time in school. He never found school easy but this year takes the cake. He gets OT Speech and SETSS. No one came over to me and suggested I put him in a special ed program like Cahal, but I am really questioning how much he is learning at all in his classroom with around 22 boys. He is happy socially, has friends, gets invited out to playdates. He is not athletic at all because of his OT issues does not join sports at recess. Should I approach the school and ask them what they think - if I should look for other options for next year or if he was really in need of a special ed school, the school would bring it up to me. I am not so impressed with his current school special ed department in general...

amother

Plum

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 12:53 pm

I would do detailed educational testing first. Find out what he needs are, and then determine which school can meet those needs.

amother

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:04 pm

amother [ Plum ] wrote:

I would do detailed educational testing first. Find out what he needs are, and then determine which school can meet those needs.

I did that over the summer. Got an adhd and Learning Disability diagnosis in order to qualify for the services. Testing (neuropsych) came back that he is around a year behind academically (no idea how much is due to covid) but bh is 100 percent cognitively normal with an average IQ and should be capable of learning everything with the proper support.

I am only seeing my kid. My question is should I assume that if he was doing so terrible the school would approach me that maybe this is not the right fit or should I not make that assumption?

amother

Plum

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:07 pm

Definitely don't make that assumption. Schedule a meeting with teachers and principals and find out what his progress is like, and whether the gap is growing or shrinking. Do they have the resources to work with his specific LD?

amother

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:14 pm

It is not a specific disability. It is a general one. The school itself does not have any special ed resources but it is in NYC and he receives OT Speech and ten hours of SETSS (one on one with a special ed teacher) from the city. The schools entire special ed department is funded by the city.

amother

Plum

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:16 pm

So the question is, is he learning during the hours he's in the classroom, or is all his learning taking place during pull out?

mha3484

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:21 pm

I have super mixed feelings on this. I think for a kid with good social skills and no behavioral problems its tempting to leave them where they are because who wants to put their kid in a special program. I have a kid with a different set of issues (more social and emotional) and I fought it for years. I just wanted him to be normal with regular kids. I did in the end switch him for a year and it was a mixed experience but I dont regret that I did it. I think he gained in some really key areas being in a very small and supportive class and he was able to go back to his yeshiva the next year.

He is in 4th grade this year and has 2-3 tests a week. His yomtov and winter vacation learning charts give me anxiety. He can handle the work just fine but there are kids that cant and for them its a pressure cooker. As much as his rebbe is fantastic and goes on and on about working with parents to accommodate their kids different needs it cant feel good to know that all your assignments are modified from the other kids. To sit and take 2 or 3 tests that maybe you only know half the answers. You feel stupid. I think this is especially dangerous for boys.

If it were me, I would ask parents of older boys what their experiences are like in 3rd, 4th and 5th grade which is when they typically start mishnayos and gemara. What are the expectations of the rebbeim? What is the test and home work situation like? How much learning are they expected to do out of school? Also what resources can the school provide a 3rd grader who struggle with mishnayos or a 5th grader with gemara? At these ages the conversation becomes a billion times harder. A good friend of mine almost held her 4th grader back in 3rd grade but the social reprecussions were massive so she did not in the end. You can avoid this now when your kid is still young enough.

amother

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:22 pm

I do have one hesitation about pulling him out of mainstream which is why I am nervous to bring up the topic. He is a bh a completely normal sociable kid with friends and zero social issues. A lot of the elementary age kids in the cahal type programs have social issues as well as academic ones.

amother

Slategray

Wed, Jan 20 2021, 1:26 pm

Do you know anything about the class your son would be part of if you would switch him? Many of the students in CAHAL are typical socially and some are not, but because it varies you need to visit the class to see for yourself.