Bad habits need to be broken! Help with ideas and chizzuk

amother

Sun, Jan 24 2021, 9:19 pm

I had a minor medical thing this winter. I haven’t had the energy and the strength I’m used to having. DH was pitching in way more than he was used to and I’m very appreciative to everything. The last week or 2 I’ve been a lot more energetic and I think I’m finally feeling (almost) back to myself. The thing with DH helping is that I feel like I can’t criticize and I’m so upset. So so many bad habits have been created. So many house rules have become undone. It feels as though the work ahead of me is too daunting a task, much more so than before this saga even started. So here’s the 1st thing I need help conquering. Pls any ideas are appreciated!

In the mornings, to allow to me to sleep in DH would bring DD6 and DD4 an iPad, a drink, and a bag of cereal and let them watch from 7 until 7:30-7:45 so that I could get some extra sleep. My girls room is a mess. The walls and baseboards have to be scrubbed from drinks falling at the side of the bed. The carpet might need a professional cleaning. The linen has stains etc. I need an idea of what we can do upstairs every morning from 7-8. I’ll be there and I’m happy to help entertain but going down before 8 isn’t really an option because we have a basement tenant and we don’t like being noisy in the mornings. I used to bathe my kids in the morning and that was the activity but I don’t think I’m ready to take my on that craziness like I used to. I also need to get them out of the bad habits that were created and I don’t know how I’m gonna deal with the crying “I’m hungry” and “I’m bored” any and all Input is great. I do bh have a baby who’s almost 2 and she sleeps till 7:30 so that wasn’t an issue ...

imasinger

Sun, Jan 24 2021, 10:21 pm

Refuah sheleima! Glad you're on the mend.

You raise three issues. You can't be downstairs until 8, and:

- The kids (6, 4, and almost 2) get hungry before 8
- When they eat and drink upstairs, it makes a big mess
- You'd like the kids to find something else besides screens to entertain themselves.

Kids are impossible when hungry, so it sounds to me like the first thing is to plan less messy food, either downstairs without you, or upstairs. Limit drinking to water. Offer prizes for neatness. Have a simple breakfast available the night before, so that the 6 year old can get for herself and siblings.

The thing to focus on for first change, then, might be getting rid of the screens. Have your kids pick a few activities they like. Make a picture chart of choices they can do in the morning. Reward them with praise or stickers for playing independently according to the rules.

You can offer a large empty box as something available for coloring on the walls of. Or use the special markers or water paints that can't color or stain.

You can offer the phone, if appropriate. My almost 2 year old granddaughter likes to call me when Mommy isn't available, and babbles on the phone. My 6 year old granddaughter loves to call the R Juravel story line.

You can offer books, music, favorite pretend play, and more. It won't always work, but each success gets you closer to back on track.