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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants
The newborn days just drive me insane



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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Feb 15 2021, 11:45 pm
This is a vent. No mussar. Ofc I'm grateful to have a healthy baby etc. Esp one that just eats and sleeps, no colic, fairly predictable schedule, no nursing issues etc.

I just lose my mind. It drives me crazy. I feel like my mind rots from doing nothing but nurse and nap and sit on top of a crying baby (baby wearing hurts my back).

It's a combination of no longer working, not leaving the house, mindlessly refreshing Instagram every minute literally. I hate this stage and I'm only 4 weeks in so from experience I still have another year left.
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Tue, Feb 16 2021, 12:09 am
I hate the newborn stage too. Gets easier around the four month mark. No advice except maybe if you’re on your phone anyway maybe find something you want to learn about.
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Bleemee




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 16 2021, 12:30 am
Why don’t you go back to work?
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amother
Chartreuse


 

Post Tue, Feb 16 2021, 8:43 am
You can and should try to get out of the house for some fresh air every day. Take a long walk. You can also start making pesach if you have the energy.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Feb 16 2021, 10:06 pm
It’s difficult when you feel like you’re not doing anything or seeing anyone. But — you’re giving your body a chance to rest up and get back to normal. You’re also nourishing your baby’s physical and emotional well being and forming a bond that will benefit him or her for a lifetime. Important stuff:)
That being said, maybe you can think of some ideas that will keep you stimulated as well.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Tue, Feb 16 2021, 10:16 pm
It is such a hard time!! It’s a blessed time too BH - newborns are yummy and just delicious, but the no time to myself or not being able to just run out for a quick errand drove me insane too!! I totally get you! Mazel Tov and Hatzlacha!!
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 16 2021, 10:20 pm
It is very hard!
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amother
Taupe


 

Post Wed, Feb 17 2021, 12:25 am
No mussar. I promise. This isn’t in a judgmental way at all. But would it help to reframe and realize what a gift this is? I know it’s stressful but it passes quickly. I had a lot going on when I had my second child. I don’t even remember much about her infant stage. Then I waited 11 long years for my third. I treasure every moment. I can sit and just stare at him all day. I probably would not feel this way had I not waited this long. But I feel fortunate that I’m able to feel this way now, and I’m kind of sad that I didn’t feel this way with my second child.
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 10:21 am
I just went back to work (very part time). My baby is 2 months old.
Bh I finally feel like myself again.
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Just One




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:08 am
That's the reason I only take six weeks maternity weeks. I find this stage really hard too. Being able to give baby over to someone else for a few hours every day, get dressed, go out and see other adults is the best thing for my mental health
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Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:12 am
It’ll get better in the spring
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avrahamama




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:15 am
Just One wrote:
That's the reason I only take six weeks maternity weeks. I find this stage really hard too. Being able to give baby over to someone else for a few hours every day, get dressed, go out and see other adults is the best thing for my mental health


I has mixed feelings. Getting to work. Feeling the burn of getting out the door on time was stressful. In my ideal world I'd have someone come stay with baby for 3 hours so can just go out and get fresh air. Get in a dance class and shower. But daily babysitting is expensive for a unemployed mother.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:16 am
If you are nursing, it is HARD! You are basically a slave to your baby. It's very admirable if you can manage it. Even the first couple of months can make a big difference for your child.

A friend of mine says "I like children - once they get out of the larval stage." LOL That's what she calls babies before they are old enough to smile and giggle with you. Once that happens, then the real bonding can begin. Before that, it can feel like you are just a baby maintenance machine.

I highly recommend watching educational documentaries on Netflix or YouTube. There is so much to learn out there, and it will keep your brain from turning to mush. TedTalks are a great place to start. National Geographic is fun if you like wildlife. 5 Minute Crafts is addictive!

You need a mantra for when you feel like you are going crazy. "It is just a phase, and it won't be this way forever." Repeat for whatever age or stage your child is in - right up through college! It works, I promise you.
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honey36




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:17 am
Same! I also really dislike newborn days. The baby is kind of cute, but so boring! I just look forward to when they start talking and the real fun begins!

My babies spend A LOT of time in the stroller for the first 2 years. Like at least 1.5-3 hours a day. That's what kept me sane and bonus it's good exercise! Even in the cold- invest in a good really warm snowsuit for baby and a comfy stroller with a very smooth push (good tires). Totally worth it.
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amother
Denim


 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:26 am
I also hate the newborn stage. I'm honestly just not a baby person really. I don't really like it till 18 months or so when they get a lot more fun and interesting and not just work and sleep deprivation. In the grand scheme of things, it's a short time, iyh with many more years ahead of that to enjoy. This will pass and it will get better.
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SuperWify




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 11:54 am
I hope you don’t literally sit on top of your baby...

Hugs. It will get better!
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amother
Burgundy


 

Post Thu, Feb 18 2021, 12:30 pm
The newborn stage is the main reason that I'm still on bc. I have a very hard time with it, physically and emotionally.
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