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Forum
-> Inquiries & Offers
-> New York related Inquiries
amother
OP
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 7:11 am
I know people stopped asking shalom bayis questions but would you have a bachur discuss yeshivas with him or a girl discuss a shidduch?
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amother
Brunette
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 10:18 am
People ask him all types of questions, including shalom bayis questions. That said, I think he needs to know the bachur and girl well to be able to discuss a yeshiva and shidduch with them. I think the family needs to have a prior connection to him, he needs to know the family.
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amother
Chocolate
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 10:19 am
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amother
Brunette
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 10:21 am
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amother
Babypink
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 10:25 am
He is a Dayan, unless they are going for chassan classes I don't see how it would help if they didn't have a Relationship before.
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amother
OP
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 11:16 am
amother [ Babypink ] wrote: | He is a Dayan, unless they are going for chassan classes I don't see how it would help if they didn't have a Relationship before. |
Someone wants to create a connection.
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amother
Brunette
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Sun, Mar 07 2021, 11:17 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Someone wants to create a connection. |
If they live in Monsey they can start by going to daven at his shul and go over to introduce themselves.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:33 am
amother [ Brunette ] wrote: | If they live in Monsey they can start by going to daven at his shul and go over to introduce themselves. |
Many people would not do this publically. His number is in the phone book and he answers the phone. Davening at his shul sounds like weird advice to me.
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amother
Brunette
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:37 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Many people would not do this publically. His number is in the phone book and he answers the phone. Davening at his shul sounds like weird advice to me. |
Of course people can just call and ask him questions. He doesn't need to know you to answer a generic question. But how can anyone help a bachur with Yeshivos, a girl with seminary, and other personal family things if they have no idea who you are?
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amother
OP
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:38 am
amother [ Brunette ] wrote: | Of course people can just call and ask him questions. He doesn't need to know you to answer a generic question. But how can anyone help a bachut with Yeshivos, a girl with seminary, and other personal family things if they have no idea who you are? |
He will meet with the people or charge them money or whatever. Most people would not just walk over to his shul.
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ShishKabob
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:39 am
I want to point out that his name is Reb or Rabbi Shmiel Nieman. Pet peeve of mine when referring to Rabbonim.
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amother
Brunette
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:59 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | He will meet with the people or charge them money or whatever. Most people would not just walk over to his shul. |
Sure people do it. DH davens there and people do it all the time. He's really happy when anyone goes over to introduce themselves. He obviously won't have time to talk about the issue on the spot. But they can introduce themselves and make up a good time to meet. You can also call him up to set up an appointment to meet him. He doesn't always charge, depending on the situation. But he does marriage counseling and relationship counseling as a business, of course he charges.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 12:09 pm
amother [ Brunette ] wrote: | Sure people do it. DH davens there and people do it all the time. He's really happy when anyone goes over to introduce themselves. He obviously won't have time to talk about the issue on the spot. But they can introduce themselves and make up a good time to meet. You can also call him up to set up an appointment to meet him. He doesn't always charge, depending on the situation. But he does marriage counseling and relationship counseling as a business, of course he charges. |
Ok so the people I know would not approach him in person or in public. They would just call and make an apt.
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amother
Brunette
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 12:14 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Ok so the people I know would not approach him in person or in public. They would just call and make an apt. |
So why don't you do that?
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amother
OP
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 2:05 pm
amother [ Brunette ] wrote: | So why don't you do that? |
Yes, do you think we need to be afraid of him making the bachur choose the less chassidishe yeshiva or encouraging a girl to choose something less frum? I'm hearing such extreme statements I don't know what to do. Someone else said to speak to a dayan R' Beck from Montreal who just relocated to Monsey.
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amother
Brunette
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:49 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Yes, do you think we need to be afraid of him making the bachur choose the less chassidishe yeshiva or encouraging a girl to choose something less frum? I'm hearing such extreme statements I don't know what to do. Someone else said to speak to a dayan R' Beck from Montreal who just relocated to Monsey. |
He would only be able to advise you if he knows the bachur/girl/family situation really well. Such questions are not meant to be asked of strangers that don't know you and your family. You can schedule an appointment and you'll tell him the entire situation and story and he'll hopefully advise you accordingly once he gets a feel of the situation.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:50 pm
amother [ Brunette ] wrote: | He would only be able to advise you if he knows the bachur/girl/family situation really well. Such questions are not meant to be asked of strangers that don't know you and your family. You can schedule an appointment and you'll tell him the entire situation and story and he'll hopefully advise you accordingly once he gets a feel of the situation. |
Right but is this subject matter up his alley,?
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amother
Brunette
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Mon, Mar 08 2021, 11:53 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Right but is this subject matter up his alley,? |
I think he deals more with shalom bayis issues. But you can inquire about this.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:58 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | I know people stopped asking shalom bayis questions but would you have a bachur discuss yeshivas with him or a girl discuss a shidduch? |
Just came across this..
Why did people stop using him for shalom bayis?
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amother
Brunette
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Mon, Oct 04 2021, 10:06 am
amother [ Saddlebrown ] wrote: | Just came across this..
Why did people stop using him for shalom bayis? |
People definitely are using him for shalom bayis issues. He's an expert in relationship situations.
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