Dear Morah: Poem about my son

amother

Sun, Mar 07 2021, 10:58 pm

Dear Morah,
We talk about my child and I wonder,
Do we see the same little boy?
When you look at my son every day,
Do you see what I see?
You tell me about
A list
Of delays.
A collection of differences.
Everything he isn’t
And what you think he should
Be.
You think my child
Should have a label.
A diagnosis.

Do you see all the love?
Do you see
The hugs
The kisses
The smiles
The affection?
Do you notice
How he feels so bad
Every time someone is hurt?
How he runs to comfort them.
Do you see how he
Loves to play with
His friends
And he plays so appropriately with toys?
Do you see how much he has learned
And grown?

I don’t think so.
I think you are blinded
By the diagnosis
You think he should have.
You are so concerned about what he
Is lacking;
You can’t see his wonderful strengths.
Maybe it’s time to check
If you are missing more than he?

amother

Brunette

Mon, Mar 08 2021, 12:08 pm

Dear Mommy,
We need to talk about your little boy
It breaks my heart
because I know
what you put into him each day.
The hugs
The kisses
The smiles
The affection.
I notice
his warm and generous nature
How he feels so bad
Every time someone is hurt.
How he runs to comfort them.
I see how he
Loves to play with
His friends.

But I also see
the differences
A list
Of delays
that you don't want to hear about
or notice
because it's so hard to relate that
to your dear little boy
with the sparkling eyes
and the beautiful soul.

As a Morah,
I know
about a list of skills
That he should have
that his peers have
at this point in life.
He should be able
to hold a scissors
and a pencil
and color in the lines
and know those colors
and maybe
draw some pictures
of familiar objects.

He should be able
to hear a story
and pay attention
and understand some
of it's meaning
and answer
some basic questions
about what he heard.

He should be able
to interact with his peers
not just with love
but also as an equal
on their level
and perform the skills
that they perform.
I see the rejection
he faces
when they don't want
to play with him
when they reject
his loving gestures
because they are too young
to understand
and be kind
to someone who is different
on a social level.

A collection of differences.
Everything he isn’t
Knowing he could be more
he could get there
with the right intervention
He should really go
for an evaluation
it might mean a label
A diagnosis.
That you don't want to hear.

Do I have a responsibility
to tell you my observations?
You will think I'll be blinded
By the diagnosis
You don't want him to have.
You want me to see
only his wonderful strengths.
You think they make up
for what he is missing.

I'm the Morah
You're the Mommy
we need to talk
but it's so painful
to tell this to you.

amother

Mauve

Mon, Mar 08 2021, 12:28 pm

I think both mommy and morah might need to see BOTH sides of the child.

A mommy should recognize and appreciate her child's goodness and strengths, and so should morah, but sometimes mommies refuse to see child's weaknesses, and that is her achrayus too.

Mommy, you are your child's greatest advocate!!!

Are you willing to listen to the morah? Are you willing to get your child evaluated? Get him the help that is recommended?
Morah isn't telling you this out of spite, because she hates your kid. She's trying to get you on board to help your own child.

Morah is morah for a year.
Mommy is mommy for life!

Signed,
a morah (duh) and a mommy.

amother

Mon, Mar 08 2021, 12:54 pm

amother [ Brunette ] wrote:

Wow! Thank you so much for this!