Am I a terrible mother?

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers

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amother

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 10:33 pm

I have a very difficult 4 year old who wears me down with her behavior.
By the time bedtime comes I'm wiped out. She never goes to sleep nicely.

Sometimes I give her a drop of melatonin about a tenth of a 1mg pill, at 6:30 so she drops off to sleep soon after, on her own. And bliss. No bedtime struggles that can last til 10 or 11, depriving me of my quiet nights.

Rising

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 10:34 pm

I do the same.
I don’t think you should feel guilty.
Doctor said it’s ok.

Last edited by Rising on Thu, Apr 15 2021, 10:40 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Slateblue

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 10:35 pm

No you're not a terrible mother but I think you should just run it by her pediatrician to make sure it's OK.

amother

Wine

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 10:38 pm

She needs to sleep as much as you need her to sleep.

womanwithaplan

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 11:22 pm

Check for pandas. It is known to cause difficult behavior and insomnia, among other symptoms.

Its also worth it to rule out any other underlying infection / pinworms etc.

Eta, food intolerances can drive a kid crazy. You might want to look into taking her off wheat, dairy, sugar and cleaning up her gut with healthy food and supplements.

You can post your general location to get recommendations for experts that can help you with this.

flowerpower

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 11:32 pm

You’re a good mother. You’re preventing yourself from having a rough night. Hopefully she’ll calm down as she matures.....

amother

Ivory

Thu, Apr 15 2021, 11:51 pm

You're doing the right thing.

amother

Brown

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 8:57 pm

Op who is guilt tripping you?

I always had sooo much trouble sleeping as a kid. I would lay in bed for hours and hours and hours every. Single. Night. I only discovered melatonim as an adult.

Im jealous of your kids now.

amother

Floralwhite

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 9:00 pm

My pediatrician told me that it’s extremely important for kids to get a good nights sleep. It’s ok to rely on a (natural) sleep aid if they need it. You’re doing the right thing. That’s a tiny dose anyway.

amother

Gray

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 9:09 pm

Nope. But I think that you feel guilty over this decision, may mean you're not exactly comfortable with it. So perhaps its worthwhile to consider some other approaches, of course I dont know what you've tried till now, just to be more confident in your choice, even if its going back to the melatonin. Sometimes exploring other options is not just to change your mind, but make you feel better about the current state of things/current choice.
Hatzlacha

SuperWify

Mon, Apr 19 2021, 9:10 pm

I did it until we regulated his sleep cycle as per his pediatrician. For a few weeks. Then I weaned him off.

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