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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 9:07 am
I had a miscarriage a little while ago and there are 2 things I'd like to put in a card for the dr.
First, I really pushed him to the limit. So I'd like to say something like "thank you for working with me".
And second, for whatever reason, I went to another Dr (whom I didn't end up using anyways), but the Dr was really hurt and he let me know it in oh so many ways . I'd like to apologize (not for going to another Dr, cuz it's my right as a patient), but more as in that he got hurt. Regardless of right/wrong, he feels how he feels and I feel terrible about it.
Id like to write it in a friendly way (I'm using this Dr for over 12 years and we're quite "fond" of each other), but I don't want it to come out sounding like I'm hitting on him or the like. I'm not looking to get reported to HR by my ob. Lol
Any help/input would be greatly appreciated.
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trixx
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 9:39 am
The whole thing sounds a little weird to me but you say you know him for a long time. So even a card with one line "Thank you for your help during this recent challenging experience" is nice enough.
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zaq
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 10:11 am
trixx wrote: | The whole thing sounds a little weird to me but you say you know him for a long time. So even a card with one line "Thank you for your help during this recent challenging experience" is nice enough. |
This.
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pause
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 10:16 am
I would add to the previous line trixx posted, "I appreciate your availability and concern for your patients. Knowing that you care about my wellbeing made this situation easier to deal with. Thank you!"
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 11:22 am
Really? Everyone thinks it's wierd? No one ever writes a card to a Dr? Hakaras hatov is not only for family and friends.
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liveandlove.ima
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 11:33 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Really? Everyone thinks it's wierd? No one ever writes a card to a Dr? Hakaras hatov is not only for family and friends. |
its the way you described it in OP that's weird, not the idea of Hakaras Hatov at all. the feelings you have towards him, and that you care, or that even he was hurt. patient /Doctor relationships are to be business like. that is actually part of the reason I chose a midwife 🙈
I'm sorry about your loss, that must be so hard ❤❤
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 12:11 pm
liveandlove.ima wrote: | its the way you described it in OP that's weird, not the idea of Hakaras Hatov at all. the feelings you have towards him, and that you care, or that even he was hurt. patient /Doctor relationships are to be business like. that is actually part of the reason I chose a midwife 🙈
I'm sorry about your loss, that must be so hard ❤❤ |
I don't really see what's wrong w what I posted, but maybe I'm reading it the way I'm thinking it. I certainly don't have any feeling towards this Dr, he's just that - my Dr. I am , bh, very happily married and hope and pray it says that way for many more years. But that doesn't mean I don't care if my Dr was hurt that I went to another Dr.
Anyhoo, thanks everyone for taking the time to reply.
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liveandlove.ima
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 12:47 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: |
Id like to write it in a friendly way (I'm using this Dr for over 12 years and we're quite "fond" of each other), but I don't want it to come out sounding like I'm hitting on him or the like. I'm not looking to get reported to HR by my ob. Lol |
This.
but then maybe it's just me reading into it so disregard.
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amother
Chocolate
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 1:21 pm
Apologizing in any way for getting another opinion would be off. It would indicate that the relationship is more than doctor/ patient which it shouldn’t be . Keep it simple . Thank you so much for your superb level of care during this recent challenging time.
Also If you attach a small gift the card is less of an issue.
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liveandlove.ima
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 1:23 pm
Thank You, Doctor Dear
For all your care
so sincere.
When all is good just fine
or in a trying time
you have always been so divine.
Trying something new
only gave me a clue
The unique and specialty of YOU.
Looking forward soon when
I will be seeing you again
In the near future, amen.
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amother
Sand
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 1:25 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | I had a miscarriage a little while ago and there are 2 things I'd like to put in a card for the dr.
First, I really pushed him to the limit. So I'd like to say something like "thank you for working with me".
And second, for whatever reason, I went to another Dr (whom I didn't end up using anyways), but the Dr was really hurt and he let me know it in oh so many ways . I'd like to apologize (not for going to another Dr, cuz it's my right as a patient), but more as in that he got hurt. Regardless of right/wrong, he feels how he feels and I feel terrible about it.
Id like to write it in a friendly way (I'm using this Dr for over 12 years and we're quite "fond" of each other), but I don't want it to come out sounding like I'm hitting on him or the like. I'm not looking to get reported to HR by my ob. Lol
Any help/input would be greatly appreciated. |
How did he convey to you that he was hurt? And a professional shouldn’t have done that, much less have felt it.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 3:07 pm
liveandlove.ima wrote: | Thank You, Doctor Dear
For all your care
so sincere.
When all is good just fine
or in a trying time
you have always been so divine.
Trying something new
only gave me a clue
The unique and specialty of YOU.
Looking forward soon when
I will be seeing you again
In the near future, amen. |
Thank you, that's really cute. How much do I owe you if I use your lines?
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liveandlove.ima
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 3:13 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Thank you, that's really cute. How much do I owe you if I use your lines? |
a lot more than you ever could afford!
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amother
Chicory
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Wed, Jul 14 2021, 3:19 pm
Agree that its definitely weird and unprofessional that he would let you know he was hurt, much less care to begin with, that you went to get a second opinion. Not normal behavior for Dr/patient
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