Should I listen to the story of the child who can lie or not

amother

Thu, Sep 09 2021, 2:24 pm

Apologies in advance for a complex question.
My x son-in law is abusive, nasty and complex. He also has an absolute intolerance and total denial of any medical problems even though one child has strong medical needs.
When it was his turn to have the children he drove them from their mother's home to his home a journey of about half an hour. It is known that child with medical problems does not travel well in the car and vomits.
Apparently on this occasion according to another child that was in the car, the child with medical problems vomited BUT also lolled their head to the side and did not respond when father called the child loudly by their name. This lasted for a few minutes. From what we were told it seems the father took no action at all (once again ignoring medical issues). The child who mentioned this situation is known to tell lies.
It looks like the father didn't allow his children to tell their mother what happened in the car because I was told about it by the other child who was in the car and NOTHING was reported to the mother by her ex.
It is very likely that if my child confronts her ex, he will lie and deny anything unusual took place in the car. My concern is whether this incident be reported to a doctor or is it best to forget about it because we have not heard about it from an adult.
TIA

notshanarishona

Thu, Sep 09 2021, 2:29 pm

If he is abusive he should only be having supervised visitation.
I wouldn’t trust a child who regularly lies although that in its own is a sign that the kid needs help but I would take whatever precautions are possible that the medically fragile child is safe

imasinger

Thu, Sep 09 2021, 2:32 pm

Oh, my. I'm sorry for all concerned.

Is there any way you could offer to help out DD by scheduling and taking DD the DC with medical issues for a check?, Suggest that the DC who reported the incident come too. Ask the doctor to talk to the DC who reported the incident.

Doctor can hopefully determine if there is cause for further concern, and ask enough pointed questions to get at the truth.

You can then ask doctor if this was serious enough to warrant reporting.