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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Our Challenging Children (gifted, ADHD, sensitive, defiant)
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amother
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 Thu, Sep 16 2021, 10:36 pm
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On yo'm kippur. My son is high functioning but could not fast or go to shulatall. Curious what happens next year for bar mitzva age autistic kids.
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gootlfriends
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Thu, Sep 16 2021, 10:45 pm
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I have a daughter but I also have a 10 month old so I didn't go to shul or expect her to. I did expect her to fast part of the day which she did well. And then to help me with the baby after so I could daven and rest. Remember that you have to subtract 1-2 years to their age when it comes to expectations. My husband discussed the expectations beforehand and made sure they were understood. Helps a lot.
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amother
OP
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Thu, Sep 16 2021, 10:51 pm
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Wow that is great anyone have a 13 year old boy what was last year' vs this year like for you . Curious what my next year could look like
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imasinger
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Thu, Sep 16 2021, 11:00 pm
My 2 with HFA are 15 and 26, both home. The older one, I didn't know better, so when he said at age 10 and 11 (and 12) that he just couldn't fast (and didn't spend much time in shul), I didn't do anything. His first year after his Bar Mitzvah, fasting was so horrible for him. It took a few years to deal. Yeshiva helped, because of peer pressure. Maturity helped.
For my YDS, I encouraged him to build the skill, offering rewards for increasing hours of fasting from age 11. BH, by bar mitzvah, he was reasonably accustomed to the experience.
You probably know the saying, if you've seen one child with autism, you've seen....one child with autism. So, no guarantees my system would work for your DS.
But it might be worth trying.
Do you have a BCBA? They could help you design a plan for the next fast this winter.
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amother
Daphne
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Thu, Sep 16 2021, 11:53 pm
Thank you so much for this thread
You made me feel a whole lot better
HFA 13 yrs old son
Hebrew reading is awful thanks to schools till now
He was on his rubik's cube probably 95 percent of the day
He does fast though
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