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Hard temperament



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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 6:34 am
Seeking advice from other mothers with babies who have a hard temperament.
I'm the OP of a few threads over the years about how difficult my babies are.
I literally tried everything and am slowly losing my mind.
This is nowhere near my first but all of them were hard.
Baby doesn't take a pacifier, doesn't fall asleep at all unless nursing and sleeps for half an hour at a time. Plus wants to be held every waking moment. I've been to drs, tried reflux meds and natural things, everything you can think of.
I finally came to a conclusion that baby just has a difficult temperament.
I'm starting to look into a sleeping coach but at this point it won't happen till after the chag.

So I'm looking for advice from other mothers who had babies like this, what worked for you?

*Please only answer if you had a baby like this.
*Please no nasty comments about me labeling my baby, I've actually been to a therapist just to deal with this situation and I was told it's fine to say that.

TIA
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amother
Pewter


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 7:18 am
Sounds like your babies have colic.
How old is your current baby?
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 7:22 am
amother [ Pewter ] wrote:
Sounds like your babies have colic.
How old is your current baby?


Not colic. I tried everything for colic.
5 months now.
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amother
Aster


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 7:24 am
Could be baby has sensory issues. My kids who cried the most as babies are very sensitive.
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amother
Poppy


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 8:06 am
amother [ Aster ] wrote:
Could be baby has sensory issues. My kids who cried the most as babies are very sensitive.


Same. I have 2 kids who were babies like this. I could barely put them down, and when they were being held, they needed to be held just so, and rocked/jumped/shaked in a certain way. It was insane. We got no sleep for a year by each one.

Today they are in elementary school, and they each have a ton of energy, and are really sensory. Particular about what clothing they can wear, and love sensory stimulation.

Sorry no suggestions, but I'm hoping it will also end soon for you.
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amother
Darkblue


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 8:13 am
No suggestions. It's hard. My first four were all easy. My last didn't stop screaming. He did have reflux and the medication helped a bit, but it didn't change his personality. At 3, he is still difficult and very needy. I'm waiting for him to outgrow it, but it's unlikely he will, as that just seems to be his personality. I'm thankful my first child wasn't like this or I would have been traumatized thinking all children were this way.
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amother
PlumPink


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 8:17 am
Same situation here. And it’s not just that I lose sleep (that’s not just on its own) it’s also that I have no life outside of that baby for a year. No simchas or trips or breaking routine because she just goes nuts. Neither of my babies EVER slept in the car except after anesthesia. So going anywhere that’s more than a 20 minute trip is a nightmare.

So far I have a toddler and a baby and both were incredibly hard babies.

I take a lot of help I can’t afford just to keep my sanity but it’s hard to find and I had a few babysitters leave because of how difficult she was.

How did you have more than two of these babies? What did you do with the older ones when you had the nexts?

I’m davening for koach but also planning for a bigger gap now to get my mind/ body/ marriage/ life into some sort of human routine before I can think about another baby. It makes me incredibly sad because they are also adorable and delicious in so many ways and as my toddler grows I can enjoy that more, I want more!
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 9:25 am
Bh all my kids did grow out of it before they were a year. And bli ayin hara they are great kids.
2 of my kids who were also like this as babies have very very slight sensory issues, really nothing serious or limiting at all. The other kids were also like this as infants and don't have any sensory problems. So I don't think it's a sensory thing.

Any more ideas?
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amother
Impatiens


 

Post Mon, Sep 20 2021, 12:27 pm
Just sympathy and as much self care as you can get.
All my 4 kids were like this and nothing made a major difference until they grew out of it although sleep coaching is something I would try now. I definitely would have had more kids if not for that. Only 1 of them is sensory now. I agree it's temperament more than anything else.
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