Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Household Management -> Finances
S/o Are you part of the 'scotch coat' club?
1  2  3  4  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
OP


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:06 am
As someone who can't even afford to buy CHEAP clothing for my kids (food stamps doesn't pay for clothes) I just need to know that there are others who understand. Dh and I work very very hard. We have both worked on getting degrees, and life circumstances (illness, special needs) have slammed is down again and again. Dh is finally finishing his training, and please please please Hashem will get a job that can at least help pay for bare necessities.
I'm just wondering if the Scotch Coat Club would even consider helping someone in their community buy normal-priced coats for their kids.
Back to top

small bean




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:07 am
Why dont you set up a go fundme. Im sure people will donate
Back to top

amother
Lightcyan


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:11 am
I don’t like this implication. I buy my kids nice clothing although nothing that expensive. We also give a lot of tzedaka. I really think it’s not ok to go around judging assuming people aren’t giving. We also give our nice clothing in perfect condition to families that need it.
Back to top

Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:12 am
There are organizations who do this
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:12 am
That is a level of humiliation that I'm not ready to take on publicly. There are people that I'm close to who know our circumstances, but they are pretty much in the same boat as we are. When we badly need something (ex: a psych eval for ASD in order to get services) we reach out to the local Chessed fund.
Back to top

Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:14 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
That is a level of humiliation that I'm not ready to take on publicly. There are people that I'm close to who know our circumstances, but they are pretty much in the same boat as we are. When we badly need something (ex: a psych eval for ASD in order to get services) we reach out to the local Chessed fund.

That’s on you then, I guess. How would it be less humiliating to take directly from someone?
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:16 am
amother [ Lightcyan ] wrote:
I don’t like this implication. I buy my kids nice clothing although nothing that expensive. We also give a lot of tzedaka. I really think it’s not ok to go around judging assuming people aren’t giving. We also give our nice clothing in perfect condition to families that need it.


That is beautiful
Then I'm not talking about you
There are families who do not give much tzedaka, and rely on scholarships and family support to fund their kids wardrobes. And it bothers me so much.
I lived in kgh, where it's normal to own a Lexus SUV and send your kids to public school because your 'can't afford' the tuition.
Maybe I'm preaching to the choir.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:17 am
Zehava wrote:
That’s on you then, I guess. How would it be less humiliating to take directly from someone?


I was referring to the GoFundMe idea
Sorry meant to quote
Back to top

amother
Peony


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:22 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
That is beautiful
Then I'm not talking about you
There are families who do not give much tzedaka, and rely on scholarships and family support to fund their kids wardrobes. And it bothers me so much.
I lived in kgh, where it's normal to own a Lexus SUV and send your kids to public school because your 'can't afford' the tuition.
Maybe I'm preaching to the choir.


What part of KGH?? I send my kids to YCQ and I have never seen a parent send to the public school unless they absolutely have to (the schools aren't the greatest). Maybe you mean the Bucharian "traditional" population?
Back to top

mompower




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:22 am
Op, your kids don’t have coats for this season?

I’d love to help if it’s something you would want.
Back to top

amother
Begonia


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:25 am
Op maybe reach out to bobbies place as they provide beautiful new Shabbos outfits for kids. I’m sorry you are going through this; it’s a painful place to be in.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:27 am
mompower wrote:
Op, your kids don’t have coats for this season?

I’d love to help if it’s something you would want.


You are so sweet
BH we have coats (yay landsend clearance!)
It's other things... I'll pm you if I can summon up the courage
Back to top

SuperWify




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:31 am
Op, can we help you?
Back to top

mompower




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:35 am
You can pm me for anything else you might need.

I won’t ask for any details or anything.

I grew up so poor. I really feel your pain. At least some of it
Back to top

small bean




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:46 am
Im confused. You do have coats for your kids?
Back to top

amother
Bronze


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:52 am
I actually just bought my daughter's coat today, on sale from Macy's. They have coats under $50 today.
It's still a lot for me, as a single mom trying to earn a living while caring for the kids, but I know they'll be needing a coat soon and this is what makes sense for me.
Back to top

mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:55 am
My kids clothing all comes from goodwill. I find northface coats with the tag on and I pass them down. No one has to know where they came from.
Back to top

amother
Trillium


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:55 am
small bean wrote:
Why dont you set up a go fundme. Im sure people will donate

That was nasty and uncalled for.
Empathy is typically a better way to go as obviously someone is hurting if they write the above.
Back to top

amother
Papaya


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:56 am
I don’t want to minimize your pain, but just because others have nice things doesn’t mean you have to have them to, or that they owe you something because of it.

It’s the way of the world. If your kids didn’t have coats then regardless of what kind of coats others have, they’d probably love to help you. To resent others for having nicer things when you have what you need- albeit slightly cheaper and maybe nerdier according to you, is simple jealousy and doesn’t come from a good place.

You’d be happier if you can learn to allow others to live their lives differently.
Back to top

amother
Papaya


 

Post Fri, Oct 15 2021, 11:58 am
amother [ Trillium ] wrote:
That was nasty and uncalled for.
Empathy is typically a better way to go as obviously someone is hurting if they write the above.


How is that response nasty?
Op asked if others would help her and this seems like an avenue where others can help her.
Back to top
Page 1 of 4 1  2  3  4  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Household Management -> Finances

Related Topics Replies Last Post
ISO Toddler Boys Warm Coat
by amother
71 Sun, Mar 17 2024, 1:03 am View last post
Looking for a part time job
by amother
0 Tue, Mar 12 2024, 1:39 pm View last post
Private part
by amother
7 Mon, Mar 11 2024, 12:02 am View last post
Looking for very part time job in BP/ remote
by amother
0 Wed, Mar 06 2024, 1:44 pm View last post
Thin wellness club/ kosher skinny shot?
by amother
3 Tue, Feb 20 2024, 11:45 pm View last post