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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
OP
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:19 pm
Long story and I dont want to be identified so I'm giving very little details, but I'm considering a residential group home for my autistic child. She's high functioning and very smart but unable to be successful in a typical school so she's been at home for a while and I'm reaching the end of my rope.
I would love for her to be in a warm wonderful Jewish place that also has a school (she's in her early teens) and that would help her find a job when she's older and look after her. basically I wish I could do it all but dont feel like I am doing a good job anymore. I feel like she's missing out in so many areas but I'm stretched thin; I also have other kids who I feel are missing out. I just want my dd to be safe and have everything she needs. Right now she spends most of her time watching videos on her latest autistic fixation.
My questions are: does such a place exist? Has anyone here done such a thing? I would appreciate some contact info.
(Location is not an issue, I would move anywhere if that would ensure her safety and wellbeing)
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#BestBubby
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:21 pm
There are residential boarding schools.
But it is very hard to get Government approval.
Very very hard!
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amother
Ultramarine
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:24 pm
Instead of sending her away, can you send her to a public school that can accommodate her needs?
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amother
Garnet
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:26 pm
There are, but it’s extremely hard to get in. You can pm Mama Bear , she can guide you.
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amother
Latte
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:27 pm
Hamaspik (in NY) has residential homes and a school. They also have a program that prepared kids to work and helps them with job placement.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:27 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Long story and I dont want to be identified so I'm giving very little details, but I'm considering a residential group home for my autistic child. She's high functioning and very smart but unable to be successful in a typical school so she's been at home for a while and I'm reaching the end of my rope.
I would love for her to be in a warm wonderful Jewish place that also has a school (she's in her early teens) and that would help her find a job when she's older and look after her. basically I wish I could do it all but dont feel like I am doing a good job anymore. I feel like she's missing out in so many areas but I'm stretched thin; I also have other kids who I feel are missing out. I just want my dd to be safe and have everything she needs. Right now she spends most of her time watching videos on her latest autistic fixation.
My questions are: does such a place exist? Has anyone here done such a thing? I would appreciate some contact info.
(Location is not an issue, I would move anywhere if that would ensure her safety and wellbeing) |
Hasc, Womens League, Hamaspik, Ohel, Jewish Board, etc in NY all have residential homes for people with disabilities. The ladies are placed in programs or have some kind of job (usually unpaid) according to their functioning level. Reach out to them and see if any of them have a placement for her that would meet her specific needs. Good Luck!
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#BestBubby
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:30 pm
OP, even if your child is in group home - still entitled to education (public or private) until age 21.
Make sure you have GUARDIANSHIP before your child turns 18, so government can't claim
your child does not WANT any more school.!
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flowerpower
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:36 pm
Definitely contact Mama Bear for advice. Good luck!
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amother
Springgreen
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 2:56 pm
We used to live in Westgate in Lakewood and there were a few group homes there. Some of the kids were pretty young actually, like children not teens. I'm pretty sure that the children attended SCHI. Although sounds like your daughter is on a higher level. I would reach out to SCHI and find out who runs those homes and if they have ones for children like your daughter.
The homes seemed to have been very well run. The kids looked very happy and well taken care of.
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amother
Lilac
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 4:45 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | Long story and I dont want to be identified so I'm giving very little details, but I'm considering a residential group home for my autistic child. She's high functioning and very smart but unable to be successful in a typical school so she's been at home for a while and I'm reaching the end of my rope.
I would love for her to be in a warm wonderful Jewish place that also has a school (she's in her early teens) and that would help her find a job when she's older and look after her. basically I wish I could do it all but dont feel like I am doing a good job anymore. I feel like she's missing out in so many areas but I'm stretched thin; I also have other kids who I feel are missing out. I just want my dd to be safe and have everything she needs. Right now she spends most of her time watching videos on her latest autistic fixation.
My questions are: does such a place exist? Has anyone here done such a thing? I would appreciate some contact info.
(Location is not an issue, I would move anywhere if that would ensure her safety and wellbeing) |
She's very high functioning? And she's okay with being put in residential care? What do you mean by high functioning? Is she okay with change? Because this will be a doozy. I mean, I REALLY REALLY get you and your desire to have this really difficult child move out and have someone else take care of her so you can give attention to your other kids (I have a low functioning child), but these things are very delicate and tricky, and you also have to consider her needs.
How old is she? Is she 10? 13? 16? That also matters. A 17 year old might be ready to move on. A 15 year old is probably not there yet.
Where you do live? Have you checked out local public schools with autism classrooms? Many have after school programming. Your local agencies should also help provide her with vocational training. You have to apply to programs. Knowing your location can give us a better idea.
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Zehava
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Tue, Oct 19 2021, 4:50 pm
I’m confused. If you’re ready to move anywhere for her to be in a school why the need to put her in a residential home?
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bnm
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Wed, Oct 20 2021, 8:20 pm
Zehava wrote: | I’m confused. If you’re ready to move anywhere for her to be in a school why the need to put her in a residential home? |
There are residential homes and there are residential schools. A lot of these places its simpler to get government funding for if you live in the same city/state. Most states don't like paying for out of state placement.
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Sunny Days
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Wed, Oct 20 2021, 9:45 pm
Echoing the others. Pm mama bear or message her on fb
Good luck
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Mama Bear
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Wed, Oct 20 2021, 10:15 pm
Hello there! I was paged, my spidey sense went off. Nah, actually, someone told me to come here. So here's the deal. This is for New York.
There are no Jewish residential schools. All residential schools, sadly, are not Jewish, and they cater to the lower functioning population.
The Jewish group homes that are run by the frum organizations, etc, no longer accept children under 18.
As others in this thread have said, your question is really confusing.
If she's high functioning, why does she need a residential setting.
If she' not in school, why don't you focus on finding her a good school where she can excel. Then she can probably be easier at home.
If you've been living with an autistic child for this long, you probably have some kind of medicaid waiver services, so your coordinator should be able to help you come up with ideas.
Can you benefit from respite? ABA counselors?
Feel free to PM me. Don't worry about your identity. I can keep it confidential.
If you'd rather email me so you that you can use a random anonymous email address, I'm at MindyCL@gmail.com. I can also text/whatsapp/call.
I'm here to help.
Good luck.
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