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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
8 year old lost recess...
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:45 am
Because she was chewing gum in class yesterday.
I asked her if she knew it was a rule. She had no clue.
Teacher took the class down for recess and sent my daughter herself back to the classroom, and took her snack and drink.
She sat the whole recess herself with no anak and drink and teacher forgot to call her back down after 5 minutes.
She said a girl came to the class and my daughter asked the girl to tell morah that she's waiting for her to call her down. But by the time teacher came it was lineup time.
Would you say anything to the teacher?
I'm really upset-but wondering if I'm over reacting. (3rd grade girls school Lakewood)
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amother
Blushpink


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:49 am
I would absolutely say something to the teacher. Don’t back her into a corner, but make new aware thy you absolutely know what is going on.
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amother
Lemonchiffon


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:50 am
I would call the teacher and say "I'm just trying to understand what happened yesterday, my dd came home so upset." Let her explain.
Sounds like a harsh punishment for a small infraction. She's only in 3rd grade.
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groovy1224




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:50 am
That's terrible. Yes you should say something.

I'm very against taking away recess for any non-behavioral offense, period. She should have been asked to spit the gum out, and done. And not only that, but to take away her snack?? Excuse me?? That is completely out of line!

And then to top it all off, she forgot your daughter? She owes your daughter an apology. I don't blame you one bit for being upset.
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amother
NeonOrange


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:50 am
I'd definitely call the teacher. The consequence is way overboard. She got afew punishments combined. Something like this happened to me when I was a kid (25 years ago) and I'm still upset at the teacher every time I remember this story.
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:53 am
amother [ Lemonchiffon ] wrote:
I would call the teacher and say "I'm just trying to understand what happened yesterday, my dd came home so upset." Let her explain.
Sounds like a harsh punishment for a small infraction. She's only in 3rd grade.

Ya. That's perfect. I do want to completely understand the story.. She's 8. She could be leaving out some details.
Even though.. No kid should ever lose their recess unless their being violent - and in that case I should be notified. Recess is just as important if not more important than some other subjects.
Thank u!
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Optione




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:54 am
I'm a teacher. Every last detail in your post is so sad and I would a thousand percent follow up with the teacher. I'd also reiterate that should it ever happen again that your child needs an adjustment to recess, her drink and snack stay with her.

I'm extremely opposed to taking away recess in 90% of situations- but that's besides the point.
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:54 am
groovy1224 wrote:
That's terrible. Yes you should say something.

I'm very against taking away recess for any non-behavioral offense, period. She should have been asked to spit the gum out, and done. And not only that, but to take away her snack?? Excuse me?? That is completely out of line!

And then to top it all off, she forgot your daughter? She owes your daughter an apology. I don't blame you one bit for being upset.

That's what I would think. Like what's the big deal. It's gum. Throw it out. Move on. Learn ur lesson.. And poor kid she literally relies on her snack. And water???? 😭
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:57 am
amother [ Lemonchiffon ] wrote:
I would call the teacher and say "I'm just trying to understand what happened yesterday, my dd came home so upset." Let her explain.
Sounds like a harsh punishment for a small infraction. She's only in 3rd grade.


I would say this, but then explain that your daughter didn't know it was a rule and all she needed to do was ask her to spit it out.
Also don't think it's safe for a child to sit in a classroom by herself, where I live it's not allowed.
Teacher way overreacted!
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DREAMING




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:01 am
Sewsew_mom wrote:
Because she was chewing gum in class yesterday.
I asked her if she knew it was a rule. She had no clue.
Teacher took the class down for recess and sent my daughter herself back to the classroom, and took her snack and drink.
She sat the whole recess herself with no anak and drink and teacher forgot to call her back down after 5 minutes.
She said a girl came to the class and my daughter asked the girl to tell morah that she's waiting for her to call her down. But by the time teacher came it was lineup time.
Would you say anything to the teacher?
I'm really upset-but wondering if I'm over reacting. (3rd grade girls school Lakewood)


Taking away the snack too????
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:01 am
Taking away recess is lazy discipline, lazy and bad classroom management, antiquated, not middah knegged middah, and illegal in some states. The punishment and what happened after show that this teacher is not someone who has a mentor and she is not someone who has learned how to manage her classroom. Not to mention, the child was left alone, which is a whole other issue. No child should be isolated in school for various safety and emotional reasons. It is literally a danger.

100% bring it up with her. If she is not receptive, take it higher.
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amother
Chestnut


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:02 am
Bizarre. I'm a teacher. If a student is chewing gum I ask them to spit it put into the garbage, and reiterate that gum chewing isn't allowed in my classroom. End of story. Why would any other action be necessary?
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:05 am
Not ok. Stand up for your child.
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octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:14 am
I would be furious. First, punishment that takes away food is a big no-no. And taking away a whole recess? Another big no-no. I would not sound nice talking to this teacher. I would make sure I sounded upset. Yes, you can give her a chance to talk (so she can dig herself further into this mess) but I would let her know how upset you are for the way it was handled. Is this a never married/no kids teacher? I find most single teachers have sechel but sometimes there are a few that are minus sechel until they have their own kids. I once had a single teacher throw out my ds entire lunch at the beginning of lunch because he got out of his seat. He came home faint. Boy, did she hear from me. She's lucky I didn't get the principal involved.
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cbg




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:24 am
DLKZ- maybe it wasn’t the first time
Please call the teacher
Also-
I would let her know that it’s not ok
1. To forget about her
2. To take away food and drink
I understand that you are not allowed to eat in the classroom

When I was teaching pre-school “TIME OUT” (when needed during recess) was a bench in the play area. There was no way I could forget the child was there.
Also I had a timer
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notshanarishona




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:30 am
I agree that the teacher overreacted And was too harsh but how can a girl get to 3rd grade not knowing gum chewing isn’t allowed? Most girls know that by 1st grade and I have a hard time believing a kid wouldn't know she is breaking a rule.
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amother
NeonOrange


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:30 am
OP, I would also call the principal about this, just to let her know what's going on.
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amother
Chicory


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:31 am
hi, posting anonymously because people may know my story:

I am a victim of what your child went through yesterday. (or worse)
When I was in kindergarten I was sent to the nursery classroom during dismissal time "for 5 minutes" because I did something that I did not know was wrong (looking back, it was something totally age appropriate for a 5 year old)
My teacher forgot about me and I was left in the nursery classroom after all the busses already left with the teachers and students.
I remember being very afraid as the cleaning crew members kept coming in to clean the classroom. eventually one of the janitors contacted the administrator who then called my parents to come pick me up.

My parents did stick up for me and I appreciated it very much.

You need to come up with a smart way to do it though. Don't attack the teacher. I would say something like "I heard you punished (name), and I'm sure you had reason to do so. However it seems like the punishment was quite harsh. Can you explain what (name) did to deserve such a harsh punishment?" then you can talk to the teacher about being more careful when punishing a student to ensure the consequence is appropriate for the specific action.
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amother
NeonOrange


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:32 am
notshanarishona wrote:
I agree that the teacher overreacted And was too harsh but how can a girl get to 3rd grade not knowing gum chewing isn’t allowed? Most girls know that by 1st grade and I have a hard time believing a kid wouldn't know she is breaking a rule.


How should they know that it's not allowed? Someone needs to tell them. My daughter just told me this week that a girl has gum on the bus and they also want. I told them that the school doesn't allow it. She had no idea, it never came up in conversation before. She's in 5th grade.
And let's say the girl did know, she still doesn't deserve to have her food taken away and to be left alone in the classroom. It's enough if the teacher says "gum is not allowed in school, please throw it away."
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ohmygosh




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:33 am
notshanarishona wrote:
I agree that the teacher overreacted And was too harsh but how can a girl get to 3rd grade not knowing gum chewing isn’t allowed? Most girls know that by 1st grade and I have a hard time believing a kid wouldn't know she is breaking a rule.


Even if she knew and did it intentionally. Leaving a young child in the classroom by herself for recess and taking away food and drink is NOT ok. OP, stand up for your child.
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