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8 year old lost recess...
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amother
Mintgreen


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 7:53 pm
You guys are all being ridiculous. I taught high school and they knew good and well there was no gum chewing. If I saw gum I would walk over to the desk holding the garbage can and wait there, while still teaching my lesson. No drama. The end. Worked perfectly for all of my very very difficult high school students even boys.
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 7:53 pm
amother [ Hotpink ] wrote:
I teach 3rd grade (not in Lakewood) and I recently mentioned to the principal about a certain misbehavior of a specific girl. She said next time that happens tell her she will spend recess in the principal’s office.
I was horrified. I would never do that.
Let the consequence match the crime.
If she chewed gum, she has to spit it out! She lost her gum, that’s enough!

No Problem. Send her to the principal. But at 8 they shouldn't be left alone without their snack and drink themselves.

I don't agree with the principal part either but wtvr they obviously don't know how to handle certain things while teaching. So if that's the safest way- go for it.
But make sure they get to the principal.
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amother
Rose


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 7:56 pm
I don't agree with the punishment but it's possible that this wasn't the first time with chewing gum. Because that's extreme for a 1st time breaking a rule.

Also, if you call the principal, most likely you will be redirected to contact the teacher. That's the first go-to of administration.
Best to go to the teacher 1st. If you still have concerns then your next step would be to contact the principal.
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chanatron1000




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 7:57 pm
amother [ Mintgreen ] wrote:
You guys are all being ridiculous. I taught high school and they knew good and well there was no gum chewing. If I saw gum I would walk over to the desk holding the garbage can and wait there, while still teaching my lesson. No drama. The end. Worked perfectly for all of my very very difficult high school students even boys.

If you taught high school, your students were probably older than eight years old.
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amother
Mintgreen


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:07 pm
chanatron1000 wrote:
If you taught high school, your students were probably older than eight years old.


Yes I'm responding to all the "past 1st grade they should know not to chew gum"
Guess what, they never know, they test the rules at any age. And at any age, there can be a no drama response without a whole fight. Especially with a poor 8 year old.
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:10 pm
amother [ Mintgreen ] wrote:
Yes I'm responding to all the "past 1st grade they should know not to chew gum"
Guess what, they never know, they test the rules at any age. And at any age, there can be a no drama response without a whole fight. Especially with a poor 8 year old.

I'm risking sounding like an idiot.. I'm not a gum chewer so this has never come up in my life. But what is wrong with chewing gum that people are making such a big deal. Your a teacher (or were a teacher) and you had this rule. What's it for?
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amother
Mintgreen


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:15 pm
Sewsew_mom wrote:
I'm risking sounding like an idiot.. I'm not a gum chewer so this has never come up in my life. But what is wrong with chewing gum that people are making such a big deal. Your a teacher (or were a teacher) and you had this rule. What's it for?


Rudeness- I personally found it rude that they would chew in my face. I didn't mind if they ate real food. They were allowed to go outside and eat a bagel or whatever they Brought or even. Eat in middle of class if it wasn't messy. I also told them clearly that this is my shtick and I have very few classroom rhles... none in fact... other than gum.
Also, another real reason is that even in high school I would find gum stuck underneath the desks. Yes for real.
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:22 pm
amother [ Mintgreen ] wrote:
Rudeness- I personally found it rude that they would chew in my face. I didn't mind if they ate real food. They were allowed to go outside and eat a bagel or whatever they Brought or even. Eat in middle of class if it wasn't messy. I also told them clearly that this is my shtick and I have very few classroom rhles... none in fact... other than gum.
Also, another real reason is that even in high school I would find gum stuck underneath the desks. Yes for real.

I hear your explanation. For some reason I don't find it rude unless someone is tactless and legit chews as they are talking to you. But there is a way to tuck it away when speaking.
The sticking gum under the desk would get me though. You are right about that. I remember gum stuck in places in school.
Thanks for responding.
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amother
Coffee


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:28 pm
So OP, did you speak to the teacher?
8yr olds are little and I would speak to the teacher for your daughters sake and to get clarity in the whole episode.

My primary boy actually came home from school yesterday telling me that he was sent to the classroom during lunch time and completely missed lunch. He sat by himself in the classroom until his classmates returned. (Poor kid!!!) He had no answer as to why his rebbe sent him there.

Obviously I called the rebbe. His rebbe felt terrible. My son had been pushing on line as the boys were walking to the lunch room so the rebbe sent him to the back of the line.(I guess this is what he does...) so my son was told to go back and he went back to the classroom. And sat there. (Poor kid!!) when I told the rebbe he said he was thinking that a kid was missing but he couldn’t figure out who. (That’s what happens when you’re in charge of 28 5 yr olds...)

Today my son came home and told me that rebbe told him that next time they have pancakes for lunch, (what he missed and felt bad about missing cuz it’s his favorite lunch) he is getting doubles. My son seems happy for it.

Please clarify with the teacher! Call her tonight!
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:41 pm
amother [ Coffee ] wrote:
So OP, did you speak to the teacher?
8yr olds are little and I would speak to the teacher for your daughters sake and to get clarity in the whole episode.

My primary boy actually came home from school yesterday telling me that he was sent to the classroom during lunch time and completely missed lunch. He sat by himself in the classroom until his classmates returned. (Poor kid!!!) He had no answer as to why his rebbe sent him there.

Obviously I called the rebbe. His rebbe felt terrible. My son had been pushing on line as the boys were walking to the lunch room so the rebbe sent him to the back of the line.(I guess this is what he does...) so my son was told to go back and he went back to the classroom. And sat there. (Poor kid!!) when I told the rebbe he said he was thinking that a kid was missing but he couldn’t figure out who. (That’s what happens when you’re in charge of 28 5 yr olds...)

Today my son came home and told me that rebbe told him that next time they have pancakes for lunch, (what he missed and felt bad about missing cuz it’s his favorite lunch) he is getting doubles. My son seems happy for it.

Please clarify with the teacher! Call her tonight!

Called and left a message that I would love to chat! Waiting for a call back.
Your story is a horrible story. Im so sad for your son. I'm so sad for all little kids. They are so small and think so differently than adults. I wish adults would realize that...
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 8:51 pm
amother [ Mintgreen ] wrote:
You guys are all being ridiculous. I taught high school and they knew good and well there was no gum chewing. If I saw gum I would walk over to the desk holding the garbage can and wait there, while still teaching my lesson. No drama. The end. Worked perfectly for all of my very very difficult high school students even boys.
: This probably deserves a spin off, but I find this so interesting. At the request of the school, my 8 year old son chews gum most of the day in school. He has ADHD and gum helps him stay on task and keep his mouth busy inn an appropriate way. Principals, teachers, and support staff are on board and just recently asked me to send more to school. Is gum really considered so bad in some places?
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:02 pm
amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:
: This probably deserves a spin off, but I find this so interesting. At the request of the school, my 8 year old son chews gum most of the day in school. He has ADHD and gum helps him stay on task and keep his mouth busy inn an appropriate way. Principals, teachers, and support staff are on board and just recently asked me to send more to school. Is gum really considered so bad in some places?

I'm Totally coming in from the same place as you btw.. I didn't think there was anything wrong. And it's helpful for those that have adhd it helps them focus.
That was my comment in the "universally accepted that gum is a no-no in school" response.
I'm curious now as well.
But that is Def a spinoff. Cus this wasn't about the rule that was possibly broken.. Just about my approach..
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amother
Gray


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:02 pm
amother [ Strawberry ] wrote:
That reminds me when I was in fifth grade I took out a picture of my baby brother and placed it on my desk to show my friends at recess. It was a minute before recess started. The teacher saw and got mad that I didn't wait until the bell rang. She took it away. I told her she was stealing and she's a ganiv. That didn't go over well. And she never returned it to me, which is problematic.
that teacher owes you. And is not so simple because the picture was worth more to you then than it does now. Thats the problem with teachers takeing things away even if you give it back at the end of the year its worth might have gone down in the students eyes. Think collection fads they come and they go.
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amother
Clover


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:06 pm
Some teachers do allow gum. Also, I don't know how OP's dd's school runs, but my kids had to wear masks either all or part of the day all of last year. My middle schooler who definitely knows the rules about eating and chewing gum in class said that it became a thing when wearing masks to chew gum, because the teacher couldn't tell most of the time. OP's dd would have been at most 6 and a half the last time she was in school before covid.

Honestly, to me, leaving her in a room by herself would be my highest priority. Everything else is over the top and likely counterproductive, but leaving her in the room is usually not allowed under any circumstances because it's a safety issue. There isn't really leeway there to hide behind. The teacher will likely say she only meant to take recess and snack away for five minutes, but she forgot, and is sorry for forgetting. But she can't leave her alone in a classroom at all.
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southernbubby




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:42 pm
If I as the parent wasn't comfortable with something, I made an issue over it.
I often got what I wanted because nobody wanted to deal with me and that was fine.
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Sewsew_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 9:44 pm
amother [ Clover ] wrote:
Some teachers do allow gum. Also, I don't know how OP's dd's school runs, but my kids had to wear masks either all or part of the day all of last year. My middle schooler who definitely knows the rules about eating and chewing gum in class said that it became a thing when wearing masks to chew gum, because the teacher couldn't tell most of the time. OP's dd would have been at most 6 and a half the last time she was in school before covid.

Honestly, to me, leaving her in a room by herself would be my highest priority. Everything else is over the top and likely counterproductive, but leaving her in the room is usually not allowed under any circumstances because it's a safety issue. There isn't really leeway there to hide behind. The teacher will likely say she only meant to take recess and snack away for five minutes, but she forgot, and is sorry for forgetting. But she can't leave her alone in a classroom at all.


U nailed it.
I spoke with the teacher. I'm so thankful I posted here before, because I went into the conversation so calm and trusted myself.
Turns out.. Teacher said kids were eating in class and she said it must've been a thing last year that kids were able to eat in class so she made a rule no eating. And my daughter was chewing gum one day - to which the teacher decided was the same thing as eating. She punished her saying she can join the class in 5 minutes, and get her snack and drink for recess. Problem is.. My daughter doesn't know the time. So she sat there the whole time. Teacher forgot. And a diff girl went back to the class and my daughter asked her if she can ask the teacher if she can have her snack back. Teacher said omg she's still there? I didn't realize she never came down. She must've not heard or misunderstood me. But it wasn't supposed to be such a harsh punishment.
She also didn't realize that my daughter didn't even put food eating together with chewing gum, and she was so happy I brought that up. She realized how unclear that can be.

We cleared things up. She was sooo thankful I called because she didn't realize how badly it affected her.
And I told her the next time someone eats in class they may actually be hungry. Maybe u can sit them right outside the classroom to finish their snack.
They are 8. They don't mean to be bad. They may actually just be hungry.
She heard me and agreed..
Thanks for all the support here. This could have ended very differently. ❤️

Oh.. And edit to add.. She didn't once mention about a no chewing gum in school rule. This wasn't about gum. It was about eating..
Now I will go through the handbook about gum chewing because it was brought up and I find it interesting..


Last edited by Sewsew_mom on Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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notshanarishona




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:15 pm
I had a spot in my classroom that had to be re-carpeted because of chewing gum. It really sticks to things and is hard to get off is the most common reason for no gum chewing in school.
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amother
Rose


 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:44 pm
notshanarishona wrote:
I had a spot in my classroom that had to be re-carpeted because of chewing gum. It really sticks to things and is hard to get off is the most common reason for no gum chewing in school.

Yes, a few years ago I worked in a school where the principal absolutely cracked down about gum after a summer where the head custodian almost had a nervous breakdown from scraping dried up gum stuck on the underside of way too many desks.
This year, there's one desk in my classroom where the kids refuse to be seated at because there's a dried blob of gum inside the desk, I don't blame them for being grossed out. I tried scraping it off and got nowhere.
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octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Oct 26 2021, 10:49 pm
southernbubby wrote:
If I as the parent wasn't comfortable with something, I made an issue over it.
I often got what I wanted because nobody wanted to deal with me and that was fine.


You have to be careful when you are the over-the-top mom. Save it for emergency situations not for every situation. I would not want want to be that parent that nobody wants to deal with. It is beyond embarrassing to be the child of THAT parent.

I'm glad it worked out for you, op. Sounds like the teacher is really young and you made her more aware of how her actions can really impact a student.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 27 2021, 6:29 am
OP, I'm glad you were able to clear things up.

Quote:
[ Clover ]"]my kids had to wear masks either all or part of the day all of last year. My middle schooler who definitely knows the rules about eating and chewing gum in class said that it became a thing when wearing masks to chew gum.


Not gonna lie, this is pretty genius. I think it would be a great idea to tell the kids "I will allow you to chew gum, as long as you keep your masks on." The incentive of gum might make them more likely to keep their masks on when they need to.

I remember in middle school and high school, if you got caught chewing gum you had to stay after school and scrape under the desks. Let the punishment fit the crime. I would never do that to a little kid, though.

IMHO, there is NEVER a good reason to take away recess for minor infractions. If the event was serious enough, send the child to the principal.

Taking away recess is a guarantee for bad behavior. Recess is the only time kids get to burn off all the excess energy that has been built up from sitting still and paying attention for so long.

I have a friend, who's son learns at Mir. He started an Ultimate Frisbee group on breaks. At first the Rosh Yeshiva thought that it was unseemly to have his guys running around in the park, but he was reluctantly willing to give it a try.

When he saw how well everyone learned after a good bit of exercise, he endorsed the group wholeheartedly, and even encouraged more people to join. Now there are several teams who play against each other, and they come back clear headed and ready to sit.
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