I need help asap!!

amother

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 8:33 pm

I've posted about this before, but every few months is a new issue. I've had trouble with my daughter's sleep routine/habits for a while, and every few months we seem to finally work them out and settle into a comfortable routine, but then a new issue pops up.
She 20 months and the current problem (started a few weeks ago) is as follows: I put her in her crib with a bottle, say good night, I love you, etc, and go out. She calls me to take the bottle when it's empty and shortly afterwards starts kvetching/whimpering/crying about just about anything. I go in periodically to make sure she's okay and comfortable, and give her kisses.... She quiets down for a few minutes and then it starts again. I've tried being the nice guy, the bad guy, ignoring her, threats, staying right outside her door shushing her in a calming voice, etc but NOTHING IS WORKING. Now she's crying for Tatty; before it was her blanket or her paci or something else. Every so often she yells to come out of the crib. I put her in and hour and a half ago. She sounds exhausted but she won't lie down long enough to fall asleep.
HELP!!!! I'm losing my mind. What am I doing wrong? What should I DO?

amother

Pearl

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 8:43 pm

My baby is 18 months and we're dealing with similar. It's 8:45 and she's still awake. I'm going crazy. Hope yours stays asleep once she goes to sleep cuz my daughter doesn't. I have no idea what to do with her and I won't just let her scream in her crib until she falls asleep. I don't know what to do anymore.

amother

Burntblack

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 8:45 pm

Hugs first of all, toddlers can be very dysregulating because they are just learning to regulate themselves.

Do u nap and put her to bed at the same time each day?

I have a very difficult toddler but bh routine solved 90% of our issues. Other than that we learnt that she sometimes needs to let out steam and kvetch and us going in wasn’t helping…

amother

White

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 8:48 pm

I also have similar issue but my son is 2.5 years old
He will need me to sit with him until he falls asleep, that tonight still sitting in his room since about 715ish.
He as well wakes up in middle if night screaming until me or my husband comes
The only way he will go back to sleep of He sleeps with us
He used to go sleep nicely, I would put him in say good night and he would go sleep and sleep the night
I am gng nuts from the no sleep I am getting...
I would also take advise...

amother

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 8:54 pm

So I try to be as regular as possible but, you know, life happens and it doesn't always work out. The truth is sometimes I see a direct link between her crazy behavior and her messed up sleep schedule, but other times there doesn't seem to be any correlation. And don't even ask about the times that she wakes up in the middle of the night and doesn't go back to sleep for 2 hours! I used to sit in her room with her until she fell asleep, but like a couple of posters have said, it's really not practical on the nights that it takes forever - I get absolutely nothing done during the day and after she goes to sleep is really my only chance to make the house look semi-presentable, unwind, and oh, did I mention I have a 2 month old who needs attention also? So that options's out.
I would almost give in and sit with her just one night, but the problem is that with her there's no such thing as "just once" bec she'll remember and demanded the next night, and then she'll get even more upset when I refuse.
Anyway, it's good to know that I'm not alone here and that others are in the same boat. Maybe time and patience really is the best answer. still open to any and all tips, though Wink

amother

Latte

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 9:09 pm

Schedule is important. Once schedule and routine are good, I do CIO at that age. After one night they learn to go to sleep on their own (I do have to restart the cycle after they are sick because they get used to sleeping in my bed or me going to them often during the night when they are sick).
Age 20 months is definitely old enough. I know women on here will scream that it’s awful but I have not seen any negative effects, my pediatrician says it’s ok, and even more awful than CIO would be a sleep deprived, energy derived mother who screams at her kids and doesn’t give them the love care and attention they deserve. That’s what would happen if I didn’t do CIO sleep training.

amother

Coffee

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 10:10 pm

Ok, you have a 2 month old. Your toddlers life had a major change just 2 short months ago and she is adjusting.
Before bedtime is really really important for filling up your toddler with connection to keep them feeling connected to you through the long night apart. Lots of extra attention, singing, some special books etc. Also try going in to offer her to refill her bottle before she calls you. She is probably just looking for you, she just feels lonely and she needs to know that you are around and you aren't trying to run away from her. See what happens when you look at it from that perspective for 2 weeks, you'll probably see a big shift

amother

Firethorn

Thu, Dec 02 2021, 10:36 pm

Call Christina from good night sleep coach! I found out about her here and just used her for a similar situation with my dc, similar age.
She was phenomenal!! And not expensive relative to the others I looked into