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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

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amother

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:22 pm

Is it socially off to call someone repeatedly and not leave a message? And do you return the call if it happens to you?

amother

Silver

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:22 pm

Depends

amother

Salmon

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:24 pm

I find people don’t like leaving messages. It depends, but if they call often enough I’ll probably end up calling back just to find out who it is.

amother

Lavender

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:25 pm

Yes it’s off and no I don’t return missed calls

My phone is for my convenience and not yours. Expecting me to call you back without me n knowing what you want is in inconvenient

amother

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:25 pm

amother [ Salmon ] wrote:

I find people don’t like leaving messages. It depends, but if they call often enough I’ll probably end up calling back just to find out who it is.

I know who it is but it's not a friend so it's not like that are just calling to chat. I'm assuming they need something.

amother

Bronze

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:27 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I know who it is but it's not a friend so it's not like that are just calling to chat. I'm assuming they need something.

The message they’d leave would anyway be can you please call me back. Most people don’t leave a message with the details and reason for the call. I’d call back if I see an acquaintance on the caller ID. No big deal.
ETA I never leave messages and hardly ever listen to messages. They are outdated.

amother

Snow

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:32 pm

Most times, I'd follow up with a text. "Just calling to say hi..." "had a quick question, call me when you get a chance" or "please call me asap".

Older people I end up leaving voice-mail, because they are actually gonna listen to it faster than reading a text lol. My mil always fills my voice-mails and I just listen when my inbox is full. It's always the same line she says. When I see her missed call, I will call her back. She doesn't get when I tell her not to leave messages

ra_mom

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:34 pm

If it's not important enough to leave a message, then it's not important enough for me to call back. I don't call back numbers I don't recognize.

amother

Charcoal

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:41 pm

My mother never leaves a message. I call her back because she's my mother and I know this about her.

Everyone else- if you want me to call you back, leave a message. Or text. Or email. I won't call you back just because I see your number on my phone. At most, I'll text you to see why you called. At most.

amother

PlumPink

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:51 pm

amother [ Lavender ] wrote:

Yes it’s off and no I don’t return missed calls

My phone is for my convenience and not yours. Expecting me to call you back without me n knowing what you want is in inconvenient

. It’s not inconvenient, it’s rude. I don’t return missed calls unless there’s a message, For several reasons: first, it could be a scam call. Most of them are. No sense in letting the scammers know that they reached a real person. Second, it could be a pocket dialed call in other words, the person didn’t intend to call me at all but they hit the wrong button on the phone. Third, if the caller can’t be bothered to leave me a message, why should I be bothered to call them back? If it’s so gosh darn important to them, they’ll call me back.Fourth, they may be calling people one after another until they get a live person. By the time I called them back, they have probably reach somebody else who has given them the information they need. So I’ve just wasted my time and a call.

amother

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 12:56 pm

amother [ PlumPink ] wrote:

. . Second, it could be a pocket dialed call in other words, the person didn’t intend to call me at all but they hit the wrong button on the phone.

I cant even tell you how many times I call my mother back and she has no idea that she even called me LOL

But I'm assuming this is not a pocket dial because they have called 5 times already. I just think it's missing something.

amother

Ecru

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 2:32 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Is it socially off to call someone repeatedly and not leave a message? And do you return the call if it happens to you?

It's extremely rude and no I dont return repeat calls that dont leave messages
(I'm 30 if that makes a difference)

nicole81

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 2:42 pm

If someone calls and doesn't leave a message, I assume whatever they're calling for is not important and no longer relevant. I definitely do not return calls unless there's a message or text sent actually asking me to do so.

To call multiple times in succession without leaving a message or texting maybe is off, but more likely the result of an inconsiderate person. Whatever they want is obviously very important in the moment, but they are not acknowledging that you, too, have things going on and can't jump to pick up just because they continue calling.

LovesHashem

Sun, Jan 02 2022, 2:58 pm

I must be from the new generation. I don't even have a voice mail.

I don't know anyone really who uses one either. If I cant reach someone I'll send them a whatsapp message or call again later.

The only time I leave messages it's for some office who requests a message to be left with my name and number.

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