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Forum -> Working Women
Would you encourage me to give up my job



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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:19 am
I work at a job where the hours are mostly flexible. I get paid nicely. I can work from home when I want to. It sounds nice on paper.
However it's sensitive work. Meaning if I make a mistake I'm in trouble quickly.
I'm not working for the money. Although it's a nice addition to DH income bh. However I find the stress getting to me lately.
If I do give it up I have nothing to fall onto. I'm afraid I'll end up baking cookies all day and gain weight. Or shop because I have nothing better to do.
What would you do in my situation?
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allthingsblue




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:23 am
What kind of trouble?
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amother
Brown


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:24 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I work at a job where the hours are mostly flexible. I get paid nicely. I can work from home when I want to. It sounds nice on paper.
However it's sensitive work. Meaning if I make a mistake I'm in trouble quickly.
I'm not working for the money. Although it's a nice addition to DH income bh. However I find the stress getting to me lately.
If I do give it up I have nothing to fall onto. I'm afraid I'll end up baking cookies all day and gain weight. Or shop because I have nothing better to do.
What would you do in my situation?

Step one is crunch the numbers. Are you 100% sure that you don't need the money? Think about what you spend on per month and cut out the amount that you make. Are you still living up to your standard?
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amother
Charcoal


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:24 am
Do you have kids? If you do you’ll be busy with them and the work they create all day and won’t have time to shop or bake.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:24 am
Trouble with the boss. Him being upset etc.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:28 am
amother [ Charcoal ] wrote:
Do you have kids? If you do you’ll be busy with them and the work they create all day and won’t have time to shop or bake.


Yes I have kids bh. But they're all off to school at this point . I don't know when I might have another one. I'm still young but not pregnant now.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:29 am
amother [ Brown ] wrote:
Step one is crunch the numbers. Are you 100% sure that you don't need the money? Think about what you spend on per month and cut out the amount that you make. Are you still living up to your standard?

Without looking at the books, I think we can make it.
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amother
Brass


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:33 am
Why not look for something else? Why does the option have to be this job or nothing?

Where are you located? What type of work do you? What kind of skills and expos you have? What hours do you work now, and how much money do you make?
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ora_43




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:35 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Trouble with the boss. Him being upset etc.

Because the work is super important and any tiny mistake means serious consequences?

Or because the boss is a jerk?

If it's the second one, I'd say look for another job. Why put yourself through that if you don't even need this job? There's gotta be a job out there that values your skills enough to give you flexible hours AND the freedom of knowing that there won't be someone jumping down your throat for every little mistake.

OTOH if your job is, like, reading brain scans (IOW the need to get things 100% right 100% of the time is inherent to the work itself), that's trickier.

What do you like about the job, besides the fact that during the time that you're working you aren't baking cookies? What drew you to the work in the first place?

If you imagine yourself giving up this whole line of work and having a part-time job doing unskilled work, or maybe just keeping busy with your hobbies and volunteer work, how does that make you feel?
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amother
Cherry


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:41 am
Personally, I'd give up the job and try to find something I liked to fill up the day. Commit to certain chesed/volunteer jobs or super easy low paid jobs where it's more for the social engagement. Even to commit to exercise class a couple days a week or other projects/classes. This is all assuming you don't need the money. I have so little tolerance for extra stress these days and I feel like the worry of a boss who's quick to get upset at me would take a toll and is so not worth it if not necessary.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:41 am
amother [ Brass ] wrote:
Why not look for something else? Why does the option have to be this job or nothing?

Where are you located? What type of work do you? What kind of skills and expos you have? What hours do you work now, and how much money do you make?


Good questions. I have no prospects at the moment. And subconsciously I think I want a break. Like a 'mental health day' but a year.
If I keep on pushing at this job. I'll be stressed but I'll be fine.
If I choose to give it up, I'll get my break. But in a year I'll need something to do.
Do I make sense or am I coming across as confused as I feel?
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amother
Lightblue


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:46 am
In retrospect I’m sorry I didn’t quit the job that was giving me a lot of stress. When you’re in it, it’s hard to have enough clarity and emotional energy to make a move. But that kind of stress saps a lot out of you.
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amother
Watermelon


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:51 am
Find another job. You seem to be fulfilled working, and its always good to have financial freedom, and savings for your family. If the pressure comes from having a jerk for a boss, you deserve better. Lots of jobs these days have become very flexible since they realized during covid that work can get done when people are at home, etc. etc.
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ssspectacular




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:55 am
Don't leave until you find another job, Then you are not going to be baking cookies....But know that every job has its stressors.
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amother
Brass


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 10:59 am
I think if I was comfortable enough financially in your position I would leave.

But keep in mind that after not working for a year it will be VERY HARD to get back into it. I’m not referring to getting hired, I’m referring to getting yourself to look for and accept a new job.

I once took a 4 month maternity leave because my previous employer let me go when my baby was born so I was on unemployment and it was So hard to get back into it.
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amother
Thistle


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 12:25 pm
Is there anything in the community that you could take on?
Do they need someone to help plan the school dinner or other fundraising events? Does the shul have a paid secretary, or would it benefit the community for you to send out the news letter/coordinate dates/order for the kiddush….(one of, not all).
Would you be interested in subbing 1-2 days a week? Being the volunteer library Morah and reading books YK the preschool classes? Volunteering in the food pantry/helping with Tomche Shabbos…..? Does your community have a clothing Gamach? You can either start one or help run/organize it.

There are so many volunteer opportunities. You can volunteer for 1-5 days a week. Fill the amount of time you want with what interests you.
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amother
DarkRed


 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 12:28 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Good questions. I have no prospects at the moment. And subconsciously I think I want a break. Like a 'mental health day' but a year.
If I keep on pushing at this job. I'll be stressed but I'll be fine.
If I choose to give it up, I'll get my break. But in a year I'll need something to do.
Do I make sense or am I coming across as confused as I feel?

Take that break. You can always find a new job if you are bored or need the money.
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SuperWify




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 23 2022, 1:33 pm
Oh please. You won’t be baking cookies. Or you can bake cookies and send them to neighbors and friends. A homemakers life is busy! A mom and wife even more so…

Take off the year. Go join a weekly class, the gym,, learns new skill or hobby, meet with friends for lunch. Redecorate or renovate your house off or the things little bits you wanted to fix.

Invite guests each Shabbos, if that’s your thing. That takes up lots of the week.

I’m sure something will turn up in a year. You can always have your eyes open.

If you don’t need need the money and it’s staging you out, it’s a no-brainer.
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