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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
My sixth grader barely socializes during the week



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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 7:22 pm
Not After school and barely has friends calling her.
She will get phone calls here and their in regard to hw. I know the younger kids get together more often on Sunday’s etc. She is well liked in school but how can I help her be more sociable or do kids that age not get together or “shmooze” on the phone to school friends. None of her friends live in the area. She hangs out sometimes during the week with neighbors but barely in the winter.
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amother
Mayflower


 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 7:23 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Not After school and barely has friends calling her.
She will get phone calls here and their in regard to hw. I know the younger kids get together more often on Sunday’s etc. She is well liked in school but how can I help her be more sociable or do kids that age not get together or “shmooze” on the phone to school friends. None of her friends live in the area. She hangs out sometimes during the week with neighbors but barely in the winter.

Does she care?
Some kids are just like that. If she's content then there's no reason to push her.
I was a kid like that and I hated being pushed to hang out when I just didn't want to.
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amother
Rose


 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 7:25 pm
We have some official play dates but my daughter only speaks on the phone about homework or to work on a project together. Her teachers say she’s doing well socially and she seems fine with her friends. Maybe invite classmates over on Sunday. I think this normal.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 7:34 pm
Tonight I asked her if she wants to invite a friend tomm. After school She agreed to it - she’s fine either way but def was happy with the idea. The friend she called mentioned she was going to a diff Friend. That made me feel so guilty. Maybe I’m not making sure she is getting the max out of her life socially. It’s a bit of a pressure during school hrs to host but I don’t want her to miss out socially bc of me.
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amother
Teal


 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 7:45 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Not After school and barely has friends calling her.
She will get phone calls here and their in regard to hw. I know the younger kids get together more often on Sunday’s etc. She is well liked in school but how can I help her be more sociable or do kids that age not get together or “shmooze” on the phone to school friends. None of her friends live in the area. She hangs out sometimes during the week with neighbors but barely in the winter.


Most 6th graders aren't really socializing on school nights that much, especially during the winter when we're indoors. More so on Sunday.
They just spend the whole school day together. They come home, eat supper, do homework, spend time with family...
My 6th grader will call a friend if she has a q about homework. If she has a test, she likes to study with a friend. But otherwise, socializing is more in school and on Sundays.
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Hashem_Yaazor




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 8:16 pm
I think that's very much personality dependent. My sixth grader has an overbooked social "calendar" and almost never comes home straight from school
My fifth grader rarely wants to do anything after school besides go home and do homework and decompress. She's more likely to say yes to a playdate on a weekend.
Both seem socially well adjusted, and I don't think of it as a problem even though they're complete opposites.
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happytobemom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 8:32 pm
That is perfectly age appropriate. Most sixth graders don't shmooze on the phone. My children never do play dates during the week, and from their friends it sounds like that's mostly standard. If she's happy, leave her. Don't push her to socialize more than she's asking for unless there's real reason for concern. You don't need to make sure she's "getting the max out of her life socially". She's not "missing out".
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erm




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 25 2022, 9:20 pm
My girls have no interest in getting together with friends during the week. They are with them all day and they like their space. They have lots of friends but enjoy being home and doing their own thing.
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