Anxiety on purim | Imamother

amother

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 6:20 pm

I suffer from germophobia. I'm nervous and purim, touching people's mishloach manos, going into people's houses, etc. I know it's just me. Venting and looking for advice

amother

Firethorn

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 6:39 pm

I'm assuming you're in therapy? With all anxiety you need exposure in small doses. This sounds life big doses. Can you minimize a bit? Can you take purell with you? What did your therapist recommend?

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 6:45 pm

Is there a reason you don’t want to go to therapy? Seems it’s a must in your situation. If it really bothers you hold a shopping bag have everyone drop it in and when you get home wipe it down.

amother

Firethorn

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 6:45 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I'm not in therapy. I don't want to go to therapy

Why not?

. Are you scared of facing the fear? Sad

That aside then in my unprofessional opinion minimize as much as you can. Also breathe gently. Have a mantra "I am safe. My body has armies that can attack germs. Healthy bodies can handle germs. I am ok. It's ok to feel scared"

Pat yourself on the back for every time you push through the fear.

I want to add that if you don't want to go to therapy medication can really help too. My son is on Zoloft without therapy and so much calmer in general. He used have a lot of meltdowns. You can find out if this can be a help in your situation. A psychiatrist is best but your regular doctor can also prescribe.

NotInNJMommy

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 6:48 pm

Why do you need to go into so many houses? Can you just drop off your MM at the door and do your seuda at home? If you have a lot of people to get to, then there doesn't have to be that much time spent going into a whole bunch of homes.

amother

Firethorn

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 6:58 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I don't have the time or money for therapy and I'm too embarrassed

Money issue you can try a clinic that has therapists covered on insurance. Anxiety is very simple to treat. For the embarrassing part, anxiety is of the least stigmatized mental health issue. We all have some anxiety. It's such a normal thing. You really can have a much more full life. Makes me sad to think.

smss

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 8:43 pm

amother [ Firethorn ] wrote:

I have to disagree with this.

A clinician who does not know what they are doing can absolutely make anxiety worse or just not be helpful at all.

Depending where you live, a free clinic might be a decent choice or it might really not be and it may be necessary to pay out of pocket.

But OP, I hope you can find some way to make it work. Anxiety typically gets worse with time the longer it goes untreated. You don't have to live like this. As for being embarrassed, believe me they've heard this one before, it's extremely common. There are gonna be clients with WAYYY more embarrassing anxieties than yours.

happy chick

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 8:51 pm

You don't have to go into ppl's homes, stand at the door. Everyone is in a flurry on Purim, no time to chat. Germs are not contagious so much from touching, but when you touch your face. Make sure to use purell a lot during the day and monitor which packages come into your home.

amother

Seashell

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 9:40 pm

You can drop off at doors, excuse yourself from coming in because you have a packed schedule. Half the time people aren't home anyway because they are also out delivering.

amother

Firethorn

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 10:03 pm

smss wrote:

I spoke to Relief after I had bad experiences with a clinic they had recommended. Originally I said I was going for anxiety/depression but really I had a ton of trauma I needed to unpack and I also had relationship issues, parenting issues etc.. They then told me that they only recommend clinics/that clinic for regular anxiety/depression.

amother

Mimosa

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 5:12 am

salt wrote:

How else does the germophobia manifest itself, other than on Purim?
Does it prevent you from functioning in any way, on other days of the year?

Purim is much busier than the rest of the year, but you still have to walk into other people's houses sometimes. Can you do that? If not, your anxiety is interfering with normal everyday functioning, and that's when therapy becomes necessary. If you can't do it for yourself, do it for the rest of your family.

amother

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 6:26 pm

I was so good over Purim. Not anxious and didn't wipe anything down. But then my neighbors family came into my house and played with my kids and their toys and all. Then the OCD came back

English3

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 6:30 pm

Amazing op, progress is small steps and keep on praising yourself. its ok that your ocd came back your human not a robot no one heals overnight, baby steps...