She's so caring, empathetic, except when jealous

amother

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 12:08 pm

my 10 year old dd is such a caring girl. However she she's a people pleaser. which has to do with low self esteem.
my younger dd is now 7 she didnt like her since the day she was born. she thought she was ugly. (older dd is exceptionally beautiful and people always have comments from time to time how pretty and cute she is. Her younger sister annoys her. Shes a smart kid but sometimes acts out. older sister is embarrassed of her when she does it at school. She doesn't get it when people think she cute. Because she sees her looks as so much cuter. she is so patient with other 7 year olds even has some for friends. but she sees all her sisters faults and it bothers her. She is so mean to her. If there is any bit of competition. Like if I have one of something she doesn't consider that her sister wants it also. she has to share. she shares with everyone else just fine. and is so nice to all her friend, parents siblings but so nasty to her sister
I work hard on not comparing the two. Any advice how to finally put an end to this.

amother

RosePink

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 2:01 pm

I don't have advice, but I was the "younger sister". My older sister made my life miserable. I only had relief when she got married when I was in high school. Even after she was married she was mean to me, but she didn't live in the same area/city so it wasn't as much of an issue on a day to day basis. Only now, that we are both married years, can we have a civilized conversation and enjoy each others company.