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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants
Working Moms: How do you know your infant is treated well a
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:23 pm
Working Moms:

How do you know your infant is treated well at babysitting group, while youre at work?

Do any babysitters who work from home, have cameras, or allow you to see whats happening from your place of work?

What makes you secure enough to send to the babysitter you chose, daily, all day?
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amother
Watermelon


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:25 pm
I did it for my first child.
I wouldn't do it again.

It's so so hard.

There is no way to know.
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#BestBubby




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:28 pm
You don't know for sure.

Ask a lot of references and davven.

Try to drop in unannounced.

Try to eavesdrop before or after drop off/pick up.
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amother
Seablue


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:34 pm
My daycare is licensed, extremely reputable (40+ years ) affiliated with my employer and therefore 2 blocks away. I’m allowed to drop by anytime, I get photos and videos and app updates. There is open communication. They’re extremely well managed and well staffed, Always within ratios even for lunch and bathroom breaks. My older child went there and thrived for the time she was there. I’m so blessed my 2nd child is there. It costs a bundle and I literally pay out of my savings but it’s amazing and worth jt
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amother
Jasmine


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:37 pm
I don't send my babies out till almost a year and research babysitters.
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amother
Chicory


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:37 pm
Because a baby can't communicate, there's no way to know what goes on there. Even in the most professionally well run places. It might actually be easier to cover up abuse in professional well run reputable places, because they know people won't suspect them.
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HonesttoGod




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:41 pm
research.
Ability to pick up early without notifying so you can “see what’s going on”.
Cleanliness.
How the babysitter acts when you’re there with other kids.
If your baby is clean and calm and content when you pick them up - yes some babies are miserable and you can notice.
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amother
Springgreen


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:43 pm
I had a pretty bad experience with a babysitter I sent to when my child was a newborn. And I heard good things from references! He would come home literally soaked from bottle spit up. She once gave him the wrong bottle.
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 8:45 pm
I would make sure the ratio of adults to babies seems realistic to you
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amother
Forsythia


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:09 pm
tichellady wrote:
I would make sure the ratio of adults to babies seems realistic to you

This 100%!!!
The best and well intentionned babysitter is not physically able to take care properly of an insane amount of babies!!!!

[I know! I'm a mother of double digit family, in the business for almost 30 years doing babysitting or younger 2's playgroup. I'm not bragging but I'm super capable. I know there's a limit!! Just want to add that it is usually more than legal ratios.]
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amother
Oatmeal


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:23 pm
I personally would not leave my child without cameras. And I would want to observe first to make sure I like what I see.
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amother
Forsythia


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:35 pm
amother [ Oatmeal ] wrote:
I personally would not leave my child without cameras. And I would want to observe first to make sure I like what I see.

This is not realistic. Unless you get a private babysitter in your own home.
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amother
Lightcyan


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:36 pm
I don’t and I literally cry and daven a lot about it. It’s so hard but unfortunately my reality at this stage in life
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:37 pm
If places have nothing to hide, why wouldnt they allow a smartphone hookup?
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amother
Honeydew


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:37 pm
U don't.
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amother
Papayawhip


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:39 pm
I mean there are also no guarantees in life when your kid is in playgroup like age 2, or nursery age 3, when they still can't communicate that well what goes on in their day. As a parent we need to do our due diligence like people said up thread, ask for references, drop by unannounced, check with yourself your intuition/gut feeling, and a lot of dovening and trusting in Hashem. Many of us don't have the luxury to keep a child home till age 1, etc., So we do the best with the info we have and make the best decision we can. Hatzlacha!
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amother
Ultramarine


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:41 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
If places have nothing to hide, why wouldnt they allow a smartphone hookup?


It is a very uncomfortable feeling. Knowing you’re being watched all day. There are lots of other ways to make sure your child is in good hands.
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amother
Oatmeal


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 9:52 pm
amother [ Forsythia ] wrote:
This is not realistic. Unless you get a private babysitter in your own home.


Why not? Plenty of day cares have cameras. And anyone who doesn't allow parents to observe would be crossed off my list immediately.
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amother
Magenta


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 10:04 pm
amother [ Ultramarine ] wrote:
It is a very uncomfortable feeling. Knowing you’re being watched all day. There are lots of other ways to make sure your child is in good hands.


Also other parents might not be ok with it.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jul 19 2022, 10:04 pm
amother [ Ultramarine ] wrote:
There are lots of other ways to make sure your child is in good hands.


Like if a child doesnt have signs of abuse and seems calm when you pick them up, and references are happy, that means theres no awful neglect throughout the day?

What are ways to make sure your child is in good hands?
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