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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
amother
OP
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 1:41 am
So I'm really horrified!
I have a simple flip phone that I never realized can even do anything.
My 10 year old takes it to bed to listen to hotlines. I just found him under his blanket watching YouTube videos!!!
I took it away and now I'm not sure how to handle this from here.
Any advice??
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amother
Steelblue
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 1:48 am
It could have been worse. I know a friend who started watching p0rn at 7 years of age.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 1:51 am
amother [ Steelblue ] wrote: | It could have been worse. I know a friend who started watching p0rn at 7 years of age. |
How do I know what he has been seeing??
I'm not sure how long this is going on for.
When I found him now, he was watching something about a lie detector so I'm hoping he hasn't seen anything bad but still! He went until bed at 9 and I found him at 1!!!!
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amother
Steelblue
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 3:03 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | How do I know what he has been seeing??
I'm not sure how long this is going on for.
When I found him now, he was watching something about a lie detector so I'm hoping he hasn't seen anything bad but still! He went until bed at 9 and I found him at 1!!!! |
You can check the YouTube history on your phone. There should be a setting where you can restrict things but it’s not 100% foolproof. Hatzlacha
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healthymom1
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 4:26 am
First off calm down. He’s a child. He’s a human. He is curious. He is normal. Don’t make him feel guilty for being normal.
Also you can tell him that’s not what you guys do in your house. Is there a topic he’s interested in maybe you could by him a book about instead…
Take a minute to breathe. Adults get curious too.
I don’t let my 12 year old watch YouTube either. But it’s happened. It’s not the end of the world.
Neither is [filth] but I keep trying to tell 12 year old if they have questions it’s normal to be curious so don’t be embarrassed it would just be better for Them to get facts from me than a warped version online.
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the world's best mom
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 8:07 am
healthymom1 wrote: | It’s not the end of the world.
Neither is [filth] but I keep trying to tell 12 year old if they have questions it’s normal to be curious so don’t be embarrassed it would just be better for Them to get facts from me than a warped version online. | I disagree. For a kid (or anyone) to watch p-rn is terrible and should not be seen as normal.
But watching clean videos one night is not the end of the world, if that's what OP's ds was doing.
OP, you should remove the internet from your phone. Maybe TAG can help? If you didn't even know it was there, I would imagine you didn't want it to be there.
If you do want it to be there, then you'll have to take the risk that your children might use it too.
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amother
Moonstone
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 8:11 am
healthymom1 wrote: | First off calm down. He’s a child. He’s a human. He is curious. He is normal. Don’t make him feel guilty for being normal.
Also you can tell him that’s not what you guys do in your house. Is there a topic he’s interested in maybe you could by him a book about instead…
Take a minute to breathe. Adults get curious too.
I don’t let my 12 year old watch YouTube either. But it’s happened. It’s not the end of the world.
Neither is [filth] but I keep trying to tell 12 year old if they have questions it’s normal to be curious so don’t be embarrassed it would just be better for Them to get facts from me than a warped version online. |
P-rn is not ok for a child!!!!!! Do you understand what they are looking at? Would you be ok with them seeing that in real life? It’s bad enough people pretend that it’s ok for adults. But you thinking it’s not an issue for a young child is pushing it too far.
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amother
Lightcoral
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 8:19 am
You’re way overreacting OP
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amother
Valerian
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 8:21 am
There is no [filth] on YouTube. He shouldn’t have been on YouTube behind your back but he couldn’t have been watching anything terrible. They bleep out bad words too.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:46 am
amother [ Valerian ] wrote: | There is no [filth] on YouTube. He shouldn’t have been on YouTube behind your back but he couldn’t have been watching anything terrible. They bleep out bad words too. |
Thank you for this information. I'm ckueless
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amother
Moonstone
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:48 am
Yes there is p-rn on YouTube! I dare you to Google it now. Too many of you are super naive. I’ve seen it myself.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:48 am
the world's best mom wrote: | I disagree. For a kid (or anyone) to watch p-rn is terrible and should not be seen as normal.
But watching clean videos one night is not the end of the world, if that's what OP's ds was doing.
OP, you should remove the internet from your phone. Maybe TAG can help? If you didn't even know it was there, I would imagine you didn't want it to be there.
If you do want it to be there, then you'll have to take the risk that your children might use it too. |
I'm not sure how long he has been doing this for. He was in the middle of watching about how a lie detector works. He is a very inquisitive child so I'm hoping he only saw such type of things.
I did not realize it was on this flip phone!
I will definitely be going to tag today to block the internet.
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amother
Moonstone
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:48 am
amother [ Valerian ] wrote: | There is no [filth] on YouTube. He shouldn’t have been on YouTube behind your back but he couldn’t have been watching anything terrible. They bleep out bad words too. |
You wish.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:50 am
amother [ Moonstone ] wrote: | Yes there is p-rn on YouTube! I dare you to Google it now. Too many of you are super naive. I’ve seen it myself. |
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amother
Valerian
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:53 am
amother [ Moonstone ] wrote: | Yes there is p-rn on YouTube! I dare you to Google it now. Too many of you are super naive. I’ve seen it myself. |
Recently? Because they’ve gotten better at it in the last few years. They even take down fixation type of videos. Anything with moaning etc isn’t allowed.
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amother
Moonstone
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 9:57 am
amother [ Valerian ] wrote: | Recently? Because they’ve gotten better at it in the last few years. They even take down fixation type of videos. Anything with moaning etc isn’t allowed. |
Yes tons still gets through.
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amother
Darkblue
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 11:07 am
For now don’t treat it as an emergency. Assume he saw videos he was interested in as a normal innocent 10 year old.
I suggest, as an experienced mom, that you show him occasional YouTube videos on these topics that interest him, that are child appropriate, with you around monitoring so he doesn’t seek it behind your back. And no more phone time alone. I think banning completely is not going to work. That has been my experience and I have kids ranging in age from 7-22.
You should discuss with him trust and the fact that he can ask him to see occasional videos but not behind your back.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 11:27 am
amother [ Darkblue ] wrote: | For now don’t treat it as an emergency. Assume he saw videos he was interested in as a normal innocent 10 year old.
I suggest, as an experienced mom, that you show him occasional YouTube videos on these topics that interest him, that are child appropriate, with you around monitoring so he doesn’t seek it behind your back. And no more phone time alone. I think banning completely is not going to work. That has been my experience and I have kids ranging in age from 7-22.
You should discuss with him trust and the fact that he can ask him to see occasional videos but not behind your back. |
Thank you for your input.
The only issue I have is that we don't allow kids internet access at alll. I have 2 laptops that internet was removed by tag. I only have my phone which has internet.
This phone he was using was the family cell phone which we recently replaced because of the discontinued 3g service. I didn't realize that a flip phone can have internet!
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hodeez
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Tue, Aug 09 2022, 11:30 am
Of course there's [filth] on YouTube. Even if there is no [filth], there's enough garbage that his innocent eyes have never seen before. Hopefully he just watches toy unboxings or kid stuff the whole time, but who knows. You know that you have to be more on top of this from now on, take it as a learning opportunity and move forward.
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