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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
A school for teen girl with behavioral issues
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:20 pm
Any suggestions?
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amother
Slategray


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:23 pm
amother OP wrote:
Any suggestions?

Where? What kind of behavioral issues?
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eight




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:28 pm
Defiant, doesn’t listen, rude, disrespectful, talks back, doesn’t follow rules - looking for a Jewish school
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amother
Slategray


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:34 pm
eight wrote:
Defiant, doesn’t listen, rude, disrespectful, talks back, doesn’t follow rules - looking for a Jewish school

Any specific location? (Also, your last post wasn’t anonymous)
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nicole81




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:37 pm
eight wrote:
Defiant, doesn’t listen, rude, disrespectful, talks back, doesn’t follow rules - looking for a Jewish school


Has she been evaluated? Do you know the underlying reason?
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amother
Apricot


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:39 pm
Bnos Chaya academy? I don't know your daughter's religious level. The girls may be a little less religious
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eight




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 6:57 pm
How do you post anonymous
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 7:23 pm
amother Apricot wrote:
Bnos Chaya academy? I don't know your daughter's religious level. The girls may be a little less religious

I was thinking that too, and they have a dorm, so OP’s location might not matter.
OP you post anonymously the same way you did in your first post- after you finish writing, scroll down a drop (before the submit button) and click the box for “yes” where it asks if you want to post anonymously.
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eight




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 7:45 pm
What type of girls go there ? What is the day to day schedule? Do they also get professional help ? Do the girls really graduate ready for life ?
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nicole81




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 8:09 pm
eight wrote:
What type of girls go there ? What is the day to day schedule? Do they also get professional help ? Do the girls really graduate ready for life ?


Many of the girls have psychological and/or psychiatric issues. They're manageable with therapy and meds where indicated. Many are or have been otd. Many have, or have had, issues with drugs and/or alcohol. Graduating "ready for life" is subjective and I have no clue what you mean by that. But most of them graduate in a much better place mentally than where they started. They go on to live productive lives. No all end up frum. But they're a lot healthier.

That's why I asked if your child has been evaluated or if you have any clue what the underlying issue is. General defiance and rudeness isn't a specific issue that any decent school sets out to mitigate. These behaviors come from somewhere. If it's due to psychological or psychiatric issues, and she hasn't been evaluated or received help, then a school isn't going to help, and she may not need a special school with treatment anyway. If she's being treated but needs additional support, then there are a couple of schools that are really good with this. If her behaviors are due to a resentment for the lifestyle, there are schools that help with this.

I would say the reason for the behavioral issues, and what your daughter wants for herself, are two critical components that should go into determining an appropriate school.
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amother
Tealblue


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 9:56 pm
any kids with behavior issues need an excelletn psychatric evaluation (see if any issues, and treat them, or get an idewa whats going on) + outstanding therapist evaluation and on going meetings.

No school can solve a problem parents+ mental health professionals put long term effort and did not help at all. Usually , such intervention, and child attending long term therapy they connect with can bring great results.

Therapist also would do private session with parent, guiding them how to work with child, where to be firm, where not, where to draw the line, how to respond when rules are broken etc.

So before looking for a school. there is a lot a parent need to do. school can only supplement home + professional efforts.

Kids ready for life? depending where they started, and how well they worked in program.

Any professional help on long term basis is great!

if anyone here mention schools , pls add state, city, and if kids there are frum/ drugs issues etc. not every child need so much exposure.

I would say, behavioral issues are a call for help, a call for attention, a cry.

Hatzlacha to all!
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amother
Aubergine


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 10:07 pm
I don’t want to complicate things, but just feel that I have to share that my daughter has had behavioral issues since very early on. She was in a regular yeshiva through 5th grade ( with behavioral modification plan and a private shadow) when that wasn’t successful, she went to a frum special needs program for 6th and 7th grade.
She was not getting what she needed across the board . She is now in a non-Jewish, private therapeutic school and never been better. Not everyone needs what she needs, but sometimes I wonder if these school can provide everything that these need and deserve.
Admittedly, I don’t know a lot about the current alternative schools out there today. Sometimes warmth acceptance and someone to shmooz with is enough, but sometimes it’s not.
Located in NJ , FWIW
Edited to add that my daughter does not have any drug or other additions.
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amother
NeonBlue


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 11:02 pm
Nefesh and Shalsheles
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amother
Nemesia


 

Post Mon, Aug 15 2022, 11:34 pm
amother Aubergine wrote:
I don’t want to complicate things, but just feel that I have to share that my daughter has had behavioral issues since very early on. She was in a regular yeshiva through 5th grade ( with behavioral modification plan and a private shadow) when that wasn’t successful, she went to a frum special needs program for 6th and 7th grade.
She was not getting what she needed across the board . She is now in a non-Jewish, private therapeutic school and never been better. Not everyone needs what she needs, but sometimes I wonder if these school can provide everything that these need and deserve.
Admittedly, I don’t know a lot about the current alternative schools out there today. Sometimes warmth acceptance and someone to shmooz with is enough, but sometimes it’s not.
Located in NJ , FWIW
Edited to add that my daughter does not have any drug or other additions.


can you share the name of the school she's in?
looking for a therapeutic school, I know there's nothing Jewish, but overwhelmed about where to start with non Jewish because it seems there are so many ways to go
how did you find the right school for your daughter?
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eight




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2022, 12:45 am
Nefesh and Shalsheles- are these schools for girls with behavioral issues? Also the lady who sent to non Jewish therapeutic school- would you mind sharing info on that
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eight




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2022, 5:16 pm
Does anyone know of the school in Richmond, Virginia. I’m Not sure what the name is however I do believe there is an enrichment program? If you do know would you mind PM me with pros and cons
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LovesHashem




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2022, 5:39 pm
What's your goal here?

Send her to school and her problems dissappear?

Lots of these schools for kids are pretty abusive and dont really help the kids.
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eight




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2022, 5:52 pm
Yes, for sure- no one can click their fingers and all things disappear, however Sometimes kids need to be in a different environment to thrive. Being extremely cautious about boarding is a must however someone mentioned this school so I thought I would try gather more info
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amother
Bluebonnet


 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2022, 6:15 pm
The only girls school in Richmond VA that I know of is Shaarei Torah but I’m not sure if they work with girls with behavioral issues/what supports they offer. I hope you find what you’re looking for.
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LovesHashem




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 16 2022, 6:27 pm
eight wrote:
Yes, for sure- no one can click their fingers and all things disappear, however Sometimes kids need to be in a different environment to thrive. Being extremely cautious about boarding is a must however someone mentioned this school so I thought I would try gather more info


So why not boarding in another city with a relative or a family while getting proper therapy and help?
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