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S/o unpopular opinions thread- kollel q
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ShishKabob




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 25 2022, 1:30 pm
mig100 wrote:
no matter how much the wife values and he prioritizes learning, its still very hard to work 8 hours and learn nearly 8 hours. unless the person can go on very little sleep
It's not the quantity of time learned it's the quality.
(of course there are very shtark learners that learn strongly the entire day)
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mommyisbest




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 28 2022, 11:30 am
Posted this before elsewhere:

I came across this fascinating article on Tzarich Iyun about how the Kollel system in Israel has essentially reversed gender roles, leaving many men unfulfilled.

https://iyun.org.il/en/sedersh.....96c43

As someone who grew up more modern and is now more yeshivish, I find that this isn't such a problem in the USA because men socially have the ability to leave Kollel and get a job, unlike in Israel.
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israelgirl




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 03 2022, 5:28 pm
Congresswoman wrote:
The “wife really wants and appreciates” argument is typical seminary idealism.

In real life it’s baloney.

(Except in rare cases where the husband is not wired to be successful in business and will feel like a bigger failure working.)

(I’m all for husband being a stay at home dad if that is his calling. But he has to do SOMETHING to provide for the family. Learning isn’t providing.)


I'm a kollel wife. I want and appreciate and respect my husbands learning-nothing bogus there, just reality.

My husband would be an extremely successful business man, as he's very intelligent and driven. I'd be devastated if he would leave learning (as would he)

We believe in living for a higher purpose and acknowledge that fueling life for the present isn't the end all in terms of fulfillment. There is a lot of fulfillment to be found by living your life for olam haba.

Aside from which, I wouldn't trade the siyata dishmaya I get while my husbands out learning for my husband to help/provide in any way. Hashem is the ultimate provider/help. When my husband is learning, I've seen countless times that things are calmer. He gets tremendous satisfaction knowing how much his learning is contributing to the functioning of the house.
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israelgirl




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 03 2022, 5:33 pm
I also have to add that the respect and appreciation that a kollel man shows his wife constantly, because of her willingness to take over "his role of providing" is something that gives our marriage great satisfaction. Rather than my husband coming in tired and expectant, he comes home glowing and full of appreciation to me for holding down the fort so that he can pursue both of our dreams.
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