Do you wait with your kids for the bus to school?

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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honeymoon

Mon, Nov 14 2022, 11:49 pm

I wait with my 5-year-old. My 7 and 8-year-olds wait right in front of my house with a couple of other neighbors and I can see them from my window so I don't wait with them.

I think a 5-year-old is too young to wait on their own. I would wait with older kids if there are no other kids waiting with them, if they leave very early when it's still quiet out, or if I'd live in an unsafe area.

amother

DarkRed

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 10:39 am

I wait with my 8 year old. My daughter is now in 7th grade, its the first year she goes herself. In the afternoon, both come home themselves. I dont like my 8 yr old in the dark by himself (he has to cross the st) but the bus is so unreliable, that its just difficult to stay at the corner for an hour. I waited last year every afternoon, but just think he can manage now. Aren't always easy answers, but 5 is way too young to be alone.

Chayalle

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 10:41 am

amother OP wrote:

We recently moved to a new neighborhood and we have school buses picking up the kids instead of carpooling (Yay!). My daughter is 5, and there are a few other kids her age who wait at the same bus stop in front of the building. I’m usually the only one who waits for my daughter’s bus, both when she leaves and when she comes home.

Do most people do this? From what age?

I waited with DD at the bus stop until this year (she entered high school and quite unceremiously told me I am no longer welcome. Oh well.) I was often the only parent. Oh well.

amother

Wine

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 10:45 am

amother Acacia wrote:

Oh my gosh! I do not go out to the bus w my kiddos and I feel guilty (and judged by the other moms) about it
Maybe add a poll?

I think this is OK as long as you make arrangements with someone specific at the bus stop (mom, older kid) who will take responsibility if something goes wrong and you're not there - ex bus doesn't show.

amother

Sage

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 10:45 am

With all the antisemitism going on, I would wait even for an older kid. It's not safe anymore.

amother

Emerald

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 11:10 am

5 is way too young. Even my 9 year old I make sure I see him go on, otherwise how do I know he arrived on the bus?

amother

Saddlebrown

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 11:13 am

When my kids were 5 I waited with them! DS is 6 and now it's often dh who waits with him because I don't make it out of the house in time. But I don't let them wait on their own til they're in 3rd grade. My older kids wait themselves.

amother

Apple

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 11:21 am

I wait with my five year old in the morning and in the afternoon he comes off himself. I wouldn’t trust him to wait on his own yet, especially this one who for some reason is not as responsible as mh older ones and has less of a sense of danger. My neighbor sent down her son himself yesterday and he kept running slightly into the street. Did she expect me to yell at her son?

amother

Pear

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 7:36 pm

amother Apple wrote:

I was often the only parent at the bus stop. Sorry- I walked them and stayed with them till they were 11 or 12 at least. But I often experienced same as above- other mothers took it for granted that I would watch (and discipline) their kiddos. Sad

amother

Forestgreen

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 7:49 pm

Y'all realize that there are horror stories of kids being kidnapped from right outside their homes? I'm not a panic worry person AT ALL and in a million years I wouldn't allow a kid to wait at the bus stop alone ARE YOU CRAZY????

notshanarishona

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 7:59 pm

I would never leave a 5 year old outside by herself. I would maybe start watching from the window at around 7.
I only started letting my daughter walk to school herself (2 blocks) in 4th grade.

amother

Bisque

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 9:50 pm

I live a couple of houses from the corner. When I stand on my porch, I can see my kids going onto the bus.

That being said, I wait on my porch to watch my 8th and 12th graders. Not because they need to be watched, but because I walk them out the door, and relax with a coffe.

I still walk my 4th graders to the corner. I don't like not knowing if they got on the bus or not

amother

Ginger

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 10:21 pm

The bus comes to my driveway. I'm not always outside with my kids but I've never let my kids go on the bus without checking my cameras. Either I or dh does try for the most part to be outside with them. When it's cold they usually wait in the house and I tell them when to go out when I see the bus coming up the block on the cameras. On the way home, they normally come in themselves. If I'm not home for the bus which happens rarely I keep my cameras on so I can call the house as soon as they come inside and let them know when I'll come home.

amother

Clematis

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 10:23 pm

amother OP wrote:

At what age would you stop? I feel like my daughter is still so little.

I still wait with my daughter at the corner. She's 10.
If we had a house stop, I'd stay connected with the camera/window at age 10. But we don't.

amother

Apple

Tue, Nov 15 2022, 11:55 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

Do you not your kids go anywhere by themselves? Dd10 doesn’t have transportation anymore, she’s required to walk 7-8 blocks to school.

amother

Carnation

Wed, Nov 16 2022, 12:09 am

In the past, the bus stop was on my corner, and I watched from my window. To all those who wait at the stops with their school age kids, what do you do with your younger kids at home? Bringing my baby and toddler out at 7:50 am to wait with me at the bus stop is not something I would ever do. These days I don't have to make this decision since drop off and pickup are door to door BH.

amother

Lily

Wed, Nov 16 2022, 12:16 am

mommy3b2c wrote:

People leave their five year olds alone at the corner ? The things I read on imamother…

nobody said that. OP is talking about alone in front of the building

amother

Kiwi

Wed, Nov 16 2022, 12:32 am

I have been blessed with a small family, not double digit, so maybe that is different and I am not judging what you do in your home. My children are close in age and on similar schedules. I have always had the ability and waited with my child at the bus. In HS, I drive my DD to the bus (it was 6:45 am and cold) I stayed and she sat in the heated car until the bus came. Many other children asked if they could wait in the warm car too. I of course didn’t say no. (Yet I did resent that nobody else assumed responsibility to drive if there was a problem and when the kids were little, people just assumed I would watch their kids in the street).
The world is tough enough, it stinks to wake up early and need to go to school (or work or run errands) why not at least feel like mommy cherishes you (see the thread about the woman who was upset DH didn’t walk her home Friday night when he went to a Shalom Zachor). I never wanted my kids to feel like something else was more important than they are a a greater priority. That doesn’t mean that one is always able to do that, it is an attitude and they are many ways to show this feeling. This is one of the ways I chose to show my kids. (There was a time in middle school where they wanted to be independent and go alone -I watched as best I could and let them feel independent. But after they felt independent, I offered to drive and I always got a if you don’t mind, I would appreciate, thank you. To which I responded. I never mind, you are my priority and the most important and special gift from Hashem)

amother

Daffodil

Wed, Nov 16 2022, 1:41 am

I wait with my kids inside my door. 7 and 9 yo. We get house stops.
Until recently we were the only family on this block to this school anyway. We live in a primarily non Jewish neighborhood. Coming home, until 1st grade I wait for my kids outside/inside my door w door open behind storm door. Depending on the weather.

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