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Forum
-> The Social Scene
Should we add a disagree button or not
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| Add a Disagree button |
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63% |
[ 163 ] |
| Remove hug and leave only like |
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8% |
[ 21 ] |
| Keep hug and like and add a third or fourth button (explain) |
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11% |
[ 30 ] |
| Don't change anything, only hug and like |
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10% |
[ 27 ] |
| Remove all buttons |
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4% |
[ 12 ] |
| Other |
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1% |
[ 5 ] |
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| Total Votes : 258 |
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amother
Peachpuff
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 Wed, Dec 21 2022, 1:38 pm
And other platforms have removed these options because it hurts people.
I don't think here is the place to add it.
It will just cause more ganging up against certain posters.
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singleagain
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 1:54 pm
| zaq wrote: | | You can post {{{HUG}}} instead, with as many brackets as you like. If you're really sympathizing, you can take the extra thirty seconds to do this. |
This was the reason the hug button was created in the first place because so many posts were just posting. Hugs without anything and op would have to throw through sometimes three four pages just to get actual responses
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amother
Springgreen
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 2:00 pm
I vote for complete transparency on who is liking and hugging.
It would be interesting to see who agrees with your posts and if the huggers are the same who are arguing with you.
I don’t know if it would work with the whole amother thing though if people always want to be anonymous on threads…
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amother
Bisque
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 2:05 pm
I would like a  button, sometimes a comment really makes me smile or laugh.
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#BestBubby
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 2:11 pm
I think the hug button should be removed and leave only like.
People can use like as emotional support.
And write encouraging post.
If someone disagrees they should explain why.
Or they can just post " disagree."
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amother
OP
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:38 pm
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Maybe if we add a word to hug and disagree it'll make it less hurtful for everyone: Genuine hug and respectfully disagree.
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chanatron1000
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:42 pm
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I don't think adding a disagree button itself would prevent misuse of the hug button. Posters might just use both. Also, imagine posting something other than a statement of opinion and getting a "disagree."
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amother
OP
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:44 pm
| chanatron1000 wrote: | | I don't think adding a disagree button itself would prevent misuse of the hug button. Posters might just use both. Also, imagine posting something other than a statement of opinion and getting a "disagree." |
I hugged you cuz I respectfully disagree  I'd not hug you if I'd have the disagree button. I think once there's disagree the hugs will be shifted over and left as a genuine hug.
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chanatron1000
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:46 pm
| amother OP wrote: | I hugged you cuz I respectfully disagree  |
I don't believe you. The hug button is not an expression of respectful disagreement, and I don't think the disagree button would be one either.
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chanatron1000
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:48 pm
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Buttons are a lazy way of communicating, not a reasonable substitute for verbal expression. In the case of the like button, it's justified because giving people empty praise isn't typically harmful.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:52 pm
| chanatron1000 wrote: | | I don't believe you. The hug button is not an expression of respectful disagreement, and I don't think the disagree button would be one either. |
Firstly, why don't you believe me? I think a statement like that is more hurtful than if you'd simply click disagree on my post. See? Why is it okay to disagree by writing a post, but not okay to just simply disagree? Sometimes simply disagreeing is less hurtful than words used, and you just proved it.
Honestly, I don't really get what's wrong with a disagree button. We're different and we have different ways of thinking. You like oranges, I like apples. Can't we disagree?
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chanatron1000
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 4:56 pm
| amother OP wrote: | Firstly, why don't you believe me? I think a statement like that is more hurtful than if you'd simply click disagree on my post. See? Why is it okay to disagree by writing a post, but not okay to just simply disagree? Sometimes simply disagreeing is less hurtful than words used, and you just proved it.
Honestly, I don't really get what's wrong with a disagree button. We're different and we have different ways of thinking. You like oranges, I like apples. Can't we disagree? |
I'm sorry if my post came across as hurtful. At least you know it was me, though, and you got a chance to respond. The reason I said I don't believe you is because the hug button comes across as passive aggressive, the message being "I pity you for thinking that," not "I respectfully disagree." With a disagree button, the implied message would be "I disagree, but I don't think you're worth my time," and if it's implemented the same way as the like and hug buttons, it will be anonymous and not give the poster the opportunity to respond.
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jflower
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 5:01 pm
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To me, the hug button implies a genuine show of support and a virtual hug. I'm not sure how some people interpret it to imply disagreement.
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Simple1
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 5:01 pm
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I wouldn’t want a disagree button. If people disagree, they should take the time to type out an explanation.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 5:01 pm
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So then the hug button needs to be removed altogether because it's doing more harm than good because it got a very negative interpretation. Best option would be if a dislike comes along with the option of being able to see who disliked it. That way posters won't be so quick to dislike unless they have a good reason to.
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chanatron1000
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 5:04 pm
| jflower wrote: | | To me, the hug button implies a genuine show of support and a virtual hug. I'm not sure how some people interpret it to imply disagreement. |
People interpret it that way because it's used that way, like "bless your heart."
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amother
Bronze
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 5:14 pm
I would much rather have a disagree as a reaction to my post. I can accept that not everyone will agree.
But a negative, sarcastic hug to me means that pple think I am stupid or worthless.
Maybe there should be agree, disagree, like.
Hugs should be   inserted from the selection available here.
Come to think of it: maybe there shouldn’t be any buttons. Perhaps if we have to search and insert from the list available here, we might think twice before reacting
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chanatron1000
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 5:49 pm
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I think renaming the hug button is worth trying. "Genuine hug" doesn't really change the connotation of positive hugs, but might not be enough for negative hugs. "Embrace" has other connotations, but it comes with the benefit of also implying agreement.
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amother
Honeysuckle
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 6:07 pm
| amother OP wrote: | Firstly, why don't you believe me? I think a statement like that is more hurtful than if you'd simply click disagree on my post. See? Why is it okay to disagree by writing a post, but not okay to just simply disagree? Sometimes simply disagreeing is less hurtful than words used, and you just proved it.
Honestly, I don't really get what's wrong with a disagree button. We're different and we have different ways of thinking. You like oranges, I like apples. Can't we disagree? |
This. I don't understand all the sensitivity about disagreeing. Are we really under the assumption that everyone agrees with our opinions. If you post in a public form, globally no less, I'm assuming you're posting to promote a conversation and not just to have your viewpoint restated back to you multiple times.
If you're looking for help and advice, wouldn't you want to get a general idea of which advice most people agree with, and which ones most people consider bad advice?
If we wouldn't have these button options, there wouldn't be a normal flow of conversation. The conversations would be interrupted with posts of people agreeing or disagreeing.
Maybe Yael should simply have a disclaimer appear when you log on. It can state - This site is for adults, where healthy conversations of differing opinions are encouraged. If you're currently not in a state to accept multiple different perspectives, please refrain from posting.
We can also have a 'safe' forum - where OP can choose to post a thread where we have no like or dislike options.
There will always be people abusing any setup, so as long as its a small minority I don't see why we need take that into account. If we try to account for every single possible way people can abuse something, this site won't be offering an enjoyable experience.
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amother
Honeysuckle
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Wed, Dec 21 2022, 6:08 pm
| Simple1 wrote: | | I wouldn’t want a disagree button. If people disagree, they should take the time to type out an explanation. |
But often it is the case where someone typed out my exact explanation, so by simply liking hers I'm providing an explanation. Would you really want every poster to type out duplicate explanations?
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