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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
Attend funeral of teen community member?



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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:40 am
I received announcement from shul that a teen from our community was a fatal accident, t”l. I know who the parents and grandparents are but they don’t know me, maybe the mother knows me by face.My friends are friends with the parents.I am not working at the time of the funeral. Because it’s a young person from our community, I specifically want to show support.Is it odd to go?
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theoneandonly




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:49 am
I'm sure there will be plenty of ppl there without a strong connection to the family, due to the horrific nature of the situation. I don't think it's weird to go.
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bsimcharabba




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:52 am
Definitely go if you can. Such a Nechama to the family.
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amother
Powderblue


 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 5:21 am
Definitely go. A large amount of the community will go, because they feel a need and to show support.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 5:23 am
I think it will be appreciated. A note to the family that you can leave in their mailbox during shiva about what moved you, or what you might like to do as a zechus, might be nice too as you don't seem to have a strong enough connection to go to shiva itself.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 5:37 am
Of course go. Mourners derive comfort from seeing that people are honoring their loved one. Nothing's sadder than a sparsely-attended funeral.
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 7:28 am
My son had a classmate killed in a car crash when he was in 8th grade. The father was my other son's rebbe a few years before. I never met the boy, nor his mother. (We moved to this city a few years before and the 2 boys really had nothing to do with each other.) Still I went to the levaya and shiva home. It was a tragedy in the city. I assumed the numbers showing up would give comfort for the family...to see the community support.
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amother
Tangerine


 

Post Thu, Feb 02 2023, 7:29 am
Showing that you care is never weird
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amother
Crimson


 

Post Mon, Feb 06 2023, 9:59 am
Hope you went or atleast watched the zoom
It was a beautiful funeral.
Similarly I have little to do with them, but I reached out to a family member to assist with something and it really meant a lot
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Bnei Berak 10




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 06 2023, 10:18 am
IMHO it's mostly not an issue to attend a Jewish funeral. Unless it's some very controversial person.
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