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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
OP
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:24 pm
Obviously I won’t. Age 9 and 6 (and the 3 yo is a darling who listens). One is an introvert who refuses to play at a friend and from the minute he comes home at 4 until nighttime he is wild and fighting with his brother.
I asked them to clean up their toys in the playroom but they refuse. They are just being wild, fighting, making more of a mess etc.
I am so angry and have no idea how to handle. This happens every night In the winter. In the summer my younger ds plays with friends and older ds rides his bike.
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amother
Beige
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:29 pm
Set up an activity schedule with them for after school include a new craft or arts and crafts supplies.. they're bored.
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amother
IndianRed
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:30 pm
Wow are you in my house?? Same situation
But I know it’s my problem
My kids just had a long hard day and need to feel safe at home, so I try my best to stay off my phone and be there with them
Surprise surprise, the better I am at being there, the better behaved they are
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amother
OP
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:34 pm
amother Beige wrote: | Set up an activity schedule with them for after school include a new craft or arts and crafts supplies.. they're bored. |
They are not interested the tiniest bit. Only my 3 yo is interested in that.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:35 pm
amother IndianRed wrote: | Wow are you in my house?? Same situation
But I know it’s my problem
My kids just had a long hard day and need to feel safe at home, so I try my best to stay off my phone and be there with them
Surprise surprise, the better I am at being there, the better behaved they are |
In what way?
Today I tried engaging them in conversation and all I got was rude responses. I took my phone and here I am.
They don’t want to play any board games and neither do I after a long day of work honestly
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#BestBubby
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:49 pm
Separate the fighters.
Give healthy snacks and a drink as soon as they get home.
Maybe go for a walk or to park after school?
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amother
Petunia
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:50 pm
Snacks and activities is the way to go. Start doing a puzzle, building with lego, or doong something they like and they will join you.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 5:52 pm
amother Petunia wrote: | Snacks and activities is the way to go. Start doing a puzzle, building with lego, or doong something they like and they will join you. |
They had snacks
Not interested in Lego. They have too much of it for too many years, it’s not exciting for them. They don’t want to do puzzles either
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amother
Viola
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Mon, Feb 06 2023, 7:22 pm
Very much feel you.
I’ve been schooling myself to understand that I’m the adult and in control of how I behave with my kids. In turn, they’re slowly starting to see me as the authority.
That means:
- Tell, don’t ask.
You their mother; they’re obligated to listen to you. Show them a firm, cool, even demeanor that guides them to behave properly.
- Talk, don’t yell.
So so hard! But worth it.
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