S/O Guests: Would you host people you don't know?

amother

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 4:39 pm

S/o of the other thread about someone looking for Pesach guests. Would you host people that you never met? I would be afraid to open myself up to problems.
Just curious what others think about hosting random people off the internet.

amother

Puce

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 4:41 pm

I would, DH would not. (So we don’t)

I would love to open my house up to project Makom, sister to sister or anything like that. My dream is to love to Israel and my home be a place for lone soldiers/lone bnot sheirut to go for Shabbos/YT.

Chayalle

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 4:55 pm

I would if they are sent to me thru someone I know and trust. Otherwise I would not.
I have a sibling who BAH does so much Hachnasas Orchim. She used to have a really open house, until she ended up with a guest who was very uncomfortable to host...she could not rest all Shabbos because she did not find him trustworthy around her kids. After that she changed her policy. References are important in the world we live in.

Reality

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 4:56 pm

For a meal? All the time. We have met many wonderful people.

I have never lived in a home with separate guest accommodations. I wouldn't host strangers to sleep over near my children.

amother

Ebony

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:03 pm

Posting anon because I have told many people IRL.

The first Pesach we were married, we were oblivious newlyweds (married 5 weeks!) and left to my parents around 3 hours before Yom Tov. The drive from Lakewood to Brooklyn is typically 1.5 hours but due to bad weather (wind closing down most lanes of the Verrazano Bridge) we ended up stuck in the approach to the bridge and it was getting closer to Yom Tov. After making some phone calls, we found a host in Staten Island who literally said "Kol Dichfin Yesei V'yeichol" Smile

and we headed on over, getting there at candlelighting right before a three day Yom Tov.

If you are on here I want to extend another thank you for graciously hosting us strangers at the last minute!! It was a beautiful Yom Tov.

BrisketBoss

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:04 pm

amother Ebony wrote:

This is why Jews are great.

effess

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:16 pm

We host ppl we don’t know (for meals) all the time.

Many delightful
Some less so
Always a pleasure.
When I or my husband needs a break, we take one and resume when ready.

My parents did the same
Grandparents did too
Probably my gggrandparents too.
My kids mostly love it

Anyone need a Seder?

NechaMom

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:18 pm

Only if I hear about them from a trusted individual.
I need to first make sure my family is safe, then I can host anyone.

amother

Marigold

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:23 pm

Certainly for meals, sometimes for Shabbos. I've hosted families looking to move to my city before that I didn't know.

amother

Jasmine

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:27 pm

No.
My husband is a massive introvert and has some level of social anxiety. He hates hosting. He'll host family occasionally because I love it, but it's really hard for him.
Hosting strangers would be a torturous experience for him.

rachelli66

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 5:53 pm

amother Ebony wrote:

Thank you for Sharing this with us! Mi K'amcha Yisroel!

Highstrung

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 6:05 pm

I’ve had guests bring guests that I didn’t know along with them. They told me beforehand that they’d be coming .
I grew up with new guests at our Shabbos table every week. My father brought home random people from shul. It was expected .

amother

Periwinkle

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 6:11 pm

amother OP wrote:

We have guests sleeping by us all the time in our basement. Most of the time I have no idea who they are until I meet them.

amother

Feverfew

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 11:12 pm

Yes to both. Sleepover guests are usually referred by someone we know, though not always. we've hosted parents of young people who posted on a local e-bulletin board that their parents need a place to sleep, just as people have hosted us when we visited our kids. And our shul chessed committee has sent people we don't know our way for Shabbat meals. One such family became good friends. They moved to another part of the country but we're still in touch 20 years later.

amother

Feverfew

Mon, Mar 27 2023, 11:19 pm

Highstrung wrote:

You reminded me that I used to set extra places at the table in case dh would see someone in shul who looked like he needed a place to eat. It's less awkward to remove unneeded place settings than to add extra ones when the guest is right there. With the place setting there already, the guest doesn't feel that he's an afterthought and making extra work for you.