Sad and struggling with getting in

amother

Tue, May 16 2023, 11:03 am

Please don't bash and no loshon hora. I just want to vent and want some emotional support and hugs...

I can't get our daughter into a girls school. Everyone has no room. No one will even interview us. I push and push and push and nothing. I beg and plead and no one seems to care. No one seems to feel that a good girl from a good family is worth adding 1 desk in a classroom. I have never been so humiliated. Everyone says try somewhere else.

My daughter is precious. She's beautiful. She's a tzanua. She's got good middos. She's a bas yisroel.

She feels like no one sees her for what she is. She feels rejected by the frum world. And frankly, so do I.

No one deserves this.

flowerpower

Tue, May 16 2023, 11:05 am

How old is she? Where do you live? I’m hearing this from many many people in the tristate area and it makes me sad and very mad. I call it a modern pandemic. A jewish girl should not have to beggggggg for a jewish education. We need to do better. It’s tragic what is going on

amother

Tue, May 16 2023, 11:08 am

I'm so scared for her. Kids often associate yiddishkeit with their relationship with institutions and feeling like they fit in, not their relationship with Hashem. What will happen to her if she doesn't get accepted somewhere, or if this continues much longer? The internal wounds are so painful and don't heal quickly.

amother

Chocolate

Tue, May 16 2023, 11:53 am

Hugs. I was in your place many years ago (in the NY area). I had my kids registered in the local public school that summer, but we ended up moving away to an OOT community where every Jew is welcome and precious.

Chayalle

Tue, May 16 2023, 11:58 am

Are you talking about high school? Crazy as it sounds, it's still "early". There are still a few months till next year. As a parent you need to carry your daughter and normalize this for her, so she gets thru it.
I say this as someone who myself got into high school - yeah over 30 years ago - at the end of June.

amother

Ivory

Tue, May 16 2023, 12:24 pm

Chayalle wrote:

Exactly this.
Op, you must be devastated. It's such a sad and upsetting situation. For your daughter's sake, don't act as if it's a catastrophe. Try not to make a big deal out of it. Act confident and reassuring even if you're not feeling it.
It's in your hands to make your daughter feel loved and wanted. You can't change the schools but as her mother you have the power to decide what type of experience this will be. You can turn this into a huge trauma for your daughter or make it a learning experience about keeping a positive attitude during the ups and downs of life that everyone experiences sooner or later.